Discuss Who here has true MLTR's? at the Relationships within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; had. no longer though.
i have a "blunt honesty" policy that i could get away ...
had. no longer though.
i have a "blunt honesty" policy that i could get away with in the past because i was disgustingly higher value than the guys around me (arrogant, you say? ). i went into the relationships saying that i enjoyed their company, was emotionally unavailable due to a past LTR, and did see other women. each of the girls (3 decent ones) pouted that there were others but stayed away from the subject. simple fact was that they enjoyed their 1-2 nights a week with me more than 7 nights a week/mad attention/validation etc from the other guys around.
all of them eventually ended when some satellite guy fiiiinally got through their defenses (probably because of lowered self esteem due to me) and i couldnt be bothered pursuing. a couple of them came back for a while (FB status) when their other relationships ended. theyre all currently in LJBF, though due to comfort being so high, i tend to sometimes big-brother them when they need it.
id give all of them higher than FB status because it was real (im still great friends with them) but perhaps not as deep as some of you guys take your MLTRs. someone define it please. for all i know, my def. of MLTR is what you guys would call "FB with feelings".
there were ONSs and FBs sprinkled over that period also, that they also knew about. looking back on it...i was toeing the line severely.
I have 2 mLTR's. They know about eachother. They actually get along quite well. I do not let them see eachother unless there is no way around it such as a social function one will be attending and I didn't know untill the last second.
One is a stripper so her work hours are great for me to spend time with the other. I have never lied to either of them about anything. I simply from the start of meeting them have been honest about what I want. I tell them when I am with you I AM WITH YOU! No talking to other girls or gaming at all. I made that mistake already with an LTR. As long as you make them feel fulfilled when they're with you or talking to you I find they have no problem and really never ask questions because you made yourself clear from the start. So there is nothing to question later on in the relationship. Which is why I approach every girl with the thought she may be a new LTR so be honest. BUT like everything the best way to learn is to completely fuck it up and learn from your mistakes. That's what I did. So I would say learn what you can and improve your skillset. Eventually you will get it down no problem.
I've got 2, right now.
I just kid around with them usually and tease
them about the other.
It's not lying, it's flirting.
It looks like this is where the PUAs gathered today :-)
Okay guys, I am not at PUA level yet(!) I go sarging on weekend evenings and open about 10-15 sets everyweek. I get their digits pretty easily but usually they don't respond to my phone calls. I am starting to believe that women do not consider the men at bars as relationship material. I am probably wrong. Where do you guys meet these girls and go as far as considering MLTR? This is beyond my dreams right now, I am okay with being desired by one only. Seriously, can you go through your memories and tell me where you meet these ladies.
your kinda stealing the point of this thread man. Start your own thread if you can't really give advice.
^ I TOTALLY agree with the first part, matter-fat, I think it's ESSENTIAL that you say this "line" b4 goin to s1.. However, I disagree with the 2nd half of your statement.. If the girl knows that you to are together, & that u are a very social person, she wont mind if you, (say on the way to the bathroom) stop & chat to a few sets, thruout a night.. I am in no way saying, totally disregard her presence & go n #close 5 Hb's right in front of her.. (use a nice lil time-bridge instead ;o) Just let her know b4 that when you are together, you are "an item" & if any1 asks, the 2 of you are merely "seeing each utha"
Originally Posted by switchblade
Now, I am talking from experience here, as I currently have 4 "gf's" who fit this exact mold.. The key I would say is, 1: DON'T LIE.. & 2: manage your time effectively.. i.e I (purposefully) only see a couple of these girls (the ones who I think/know will become too clingy) like 2wice a fortnight 3: Dont let them/ur realationship go stale.. make sure you send a sms, an email.. give a call every so often, to let them know you still love 'em.. & I can't stress enough how important it is 2 tell them from the outset that (this is p[retty much verbatim of what I use) "You're not a 1 girl guy, that you are too young/busy/whatever excuse u can use to be in a full-time relationship right now, but that u are willing to be together on those basis, (that when u are in physical conatct with each utha, u are "together") I also let them know that I wont tolerate them buggin my txtbox or cell with calls all the time, begging for my time/attention.. but to still call me/txt me every so often to let me kno they still love me..
If you can set up this situation & balance it, u can easily have up to 10 Mltrs going on at once.. I should also mention that I do it with minimal effort these days, u should too. i.e dont stress if sum bitch is buggin out/falling away) just kno that so many options are out there, having 1 slip away is nothing to worry about, she's the one losing out on something special.. not you.. I also have the mindframe that I am just "silphing" thru the sea of many birds & just waiting for the right one.. (psssh.. who am I kidding? lol, this one is for u rationalization freaks..)
Anywho, I hope that helped & I wish you good luck in ur mltr endeavours.. shit can b GREAT if you can pull it off with minimal stress..
Stay up pimps..
Last edited by Flowz; 04-30-2006 at 10:26 PM.
I agree Flowz you should be able to be social I just meant talking in a way to pick up a girl in front of you mLTR is wrong. I cant stress how right you are with the TIME MANAGEMENT aspect of mLTR's. It can be a juggling act at times. If your congruent from the start with what you want out this meeting then you should be able to change her to an LTR no problem.
^^ Exactly!! in fact, that's the perfect discription of an MLTR.. any girl who you are "gaming", seeing on a reggula/semi-reggula basis who you could easily turn into a mutual LTR at any time.. beautiful..
Originally Posted by switchblade
&.. re: the picking up in frotn of ish.. 1 of my MLTR's knows that I'm a "PUA" (I prefer 'natural' lol) so I've demo'd some stuff for her & had her be my pivot (more a 3some finder tho.. lol) but if u wanna keep the PUA thing a secret then I wouldn't advise going past A2 in a set in front of her.. although, depending on how ur callibration is, some girls get off/find it comforting about the fact that many women are attracted to you, yet she knows you are going home with her..
Anywho.. great thread..
Wow we have alot in common. My stripper mLTR knows that I am in the community and she actually is really into it. She wants to learn all she can which I don't care what she knows. right now she reading Juggler's stuff. The other mLTR is aware of what I do but has no idea what it's really about.