Discuss Starting to hang out with my ex. I dont know what to do now. Please help!! at the Relationships within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; Starting to hang out with my ex. I dont know what to do now. Please ...
Starting to hang out with my ex. I dont know what to do now. Please help!!
Hi, my exgirlfriend broke up with me almost two months ago, since then we have been LC. Last week she said hello to me on facebook chat and asked me how I was doing, how my family was, etc. On saturday out of the blue she said hello to me again but this time she asked me if I wanted to hang out with her in the night, so I told her that I could not see her in the night because I had a friend's party in the night but that in the afternoon I could see her. So we went for coffee and we hang out like in the old days, she was somewhat flirty with me, she touched my face, nose and hands a lot of times, although we never kissed but we had a good time. But the thing is that I dont know what to do now, she never mentioned anything about getting back together so I dont know if it would be good to wait for her to contact me again or if I have to contact her again and ask her out, that is one issue. Now the other one is that I dont want to get stuck in the friendzone with her, should I mention something about the relationship?. What should be my next move?
Nothing. That's you're next move. Nothing.
Your friends, and the women who do want you should be a part of your life. They should be your focus, not her. She had her chance, and she gave it up. No worries, but no privileges either.
Jack's advice is sound. Move on and do/say nothing with regards to the ex. Go get a woman who wants you in her life.
There seem to be lots of dudes who want their ex's back!
Hey, it's all just advice. You can go out there and do whatever the FUCK YOU WANNA DO! - Hodgetwins
Bang her for old time's sake and move onto the next chick!
I went through the same thing with my ex recently. Here is what to do:
Originally Posted by rovis77
1. NEVER BRING UP THE PAST AT ALL - if she does you just say that was then and its behind us - if she did some bad things say she's changed and isnt like that anymore and you have changed aswell. Never show that any of the bad things she did had any effect on you. You dont care about it all it was then and she's changed
2. Read DD's double your dating and see the part where he talks about using the word friend against her. If you say "well we can just hang out and if anything we can just be friends - it takes that frame away from her! Dont use this unless she seems like he starts to try and use this on you - only use it if you have to - YOU DONT NEED LABELS - just see it as hanging out and having fun with a cool fun sexy guy....thats all it is. If she brings up the friend thing before you be TOTALLY COOL with it - any hesitation makes you seem like you want more and puts you in the chasing frame. (I totally ruined what could have been a reconciliation by saying "I dont ever want to be friends with you" - DONT DO ANYTHING LIKE THIS - you just totally accept it if she says it and continue to run game as if she hadn't)
3. Improve, you need to change change something drastically about you - buy a new set of clothes - go all out and spend some serious money to make yourself look good - but in a slightly different way - maybe go for a slightly harder look? cooler look? - also do something different - start working out or join a dance class - you need to be able to convey that you have changed aswell.
4. Consider what you did wrong that caused the BU - make damm sure you think of everything you did wrong and make sure you dont display even a tiny ibit of those traits ever again, totally become the opposite -if you had a problem with her flirting with other guys - be totally cool with it now.
5. Make some female friends/"friends" (girls that like you and you have gone on a few dates with) if she has guy friends and you dont there is a big power gap there that will automatically put you under her whatever you do, get some girls that you hang around with that you can mention subtly if she mentions any guy friends - you have to make sure this is natural not like its a game - its for you aswell.
6. If she starts making advances make sure your not too eager - make sure she has to work for everything aswell or she'll get buyers remorse and think it was too easy - but dont push this too far - just saying make sure she is not your first priority
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