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well me and my girlfriend recently ...
girl friend not saying goodbye online anymore
well me and my girlfriend recently havnt been as close as we used to be.
and we only are able to see eachother on the weekend, but do talk on facebook chat every night. but recently she has been talking to me less and less.
now shes at the stage where she hasnt said goodbye to me. where it used to be xxxx <3 and all that jazz. its been 3 times in a row, and initially i didnt call her out on it. coz it could have been for a number of reasons, but now shes not caring.
what should i do. i do really like this girl. and shes good for me in the fact she brings me to lots of partys in which i can improve my social skills. so i would like to keep her.
i feel her attraction and love for me has gone down hill. and im trying to man up. so what should i do about the lack of xxxx's and her not saying goodbye at all.
also what are some good conversations to have with her. that will make her like me more?
Originally Posted by attractosaurus
Honestly man, it sounds like you think that you are lower value than her, and it seems like she can sense this. If the reason why she is "good" for you is because she brings you to lots of parties, it seems like she has the upper hand in the relationship. This is also supported by the fact that she is the one who keeps signing off on you, its clear that you are more afraid to lose her than she is to lose you. If the only reason you think she is good for you is because she gives you a social "in", I think you should really consider breaking up with her and moving on, because its clear that the way this is going shes eventually gonna do this to you.
It can have one of two effects:
1. You break up with her and look elsewhere to improve your social skills, meet new girls, and find one that will treat you right. This will also allow you to regain your frame, as it seems like you have completely lost the upperhand in this relationship.
2. It's obvious that she thinks you are more scared to lose her than she is of you, hence her poor treatment of you. If you were to break up with her out of the blue, she would feel an initial shock, and to be honest it would probably make her want you a lot more than she does now.
Good luck, keep us posted.
You sound like you're way too available. How long have you been dating, and why do you only see each other on weekends?
How does she act when you guys are together, not online?
we have been dating for about 3 months, and i can only see her on the weekends as im in my final year at skl and its a few months till my exams, so i have had alot of course work to do during the week.
Originally Posted by Vapor
umm sometimes she can seem into it, and like grab my hand or touch me in a couply way, but i can tell she feels like she can do whatever she wants, and ill still be there
Originally Posted by Fact0r
When you two are spending time together in person is she affectionate and open/talkative, or does she seem guarded like something is "off". If it's A. I would say don't worry about the goodbye thing. If it's B. it could be indicative of something else.
From your last post I got the impression you might not be praising her good qualities and are expecting her to keep chasing you. This combination can lead to withdrawn behvaiors. Are you making her feel good about herself?
You should be hooking up with other girls until you and her are able to have more time together. 3 months in and you don't see her much.. should still be exploring different avenues in the dating world until you get to be with her more and know her better.
If someone's long distance with me, I actually cut back on talking to them... 2-3 times a week is a lot for me. I should be able to trust her, but I don't trust anyone off the bat, nor expect them to give me complete trust. That's naive.
You can also turn that FB chat off. I had to, because when I didn't, I got barraged with people I didn't feel like talking to, and "too busy right now" from the ones I said hi to. I just said fuck it and turned it off altogether, plus I could call them if I wanted to talk to them. Esp. a girlfriend, I'd rather hear her voice.
Do you see her every weekend, or a couple of times a month?
Originally Posted by attractosaurus
I agree with sdnightfly. I would give my left nut to have the dating opportunities that a guy in college has. Single girls are *everywhere.*
Another thing, and this never changes, is that a girl in her 20s has a million opportunities. I wrote a big ol' thread on dating tens, and one thing that I realized is that dating tens is just a pain in the ass after a while. Even after you get 'em, keeping 'em is a never-ending battle.
You're in college - girls are going to come, and girls are going to go. While studying sucks, the benefits of studying are going to pay off when you are older. When you are in you're 30s, you will be able to pull college girls, no problem, as long as you get that degree, learn some game, and establish a high value life.
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