Bar Relationships

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    Bar Relationships

    I have my own opinions on this but I wanted to see what you guys think...

    Why is it that bar hookups (no matter the rapport built and how great the sex was) always ends (never get a g/f out of it but more like a short-term girlfriend) 95% of the time.

    The other 5% of the time, it seems that the girl you hook up can be easily made into your g/f.



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    well that 95% number is based solely on your own experiences and those of people you know..so its not a very good number to go by overall..


    but in general, bars/clubs are social atmospheres where both men and women go to have..fun. fun means drinking, fun means grinding, and fun means fuckin

    its a casual atmosphere where expectations are lowered...this means most people dont go to find their next 1 year relationship or so..

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mind_Diversion View Post
    I have my own opinions on this but I wanted to see what you guys think...

    Why is it that bar hookups (no matter the rapport built and how great the sex was) always ends (never get a g/f out of it but more like a short-term girlfriend) 95% of the time.

    The other 5% of the time, it seems that the girl you hook up can be easily made into your g/f.

    What do you think about buying groceries at the gas station? I know you can go to supermarket and purchase all items for dinner, but what's wrong with buying groceries at the gas station?

    Same analogy applies here. You simply don't go to the bar to find a girlfriend just as you do not go to gas station to do your weekly grocery shopping.

    It's feasible, but not as easy.
    The ghost of pua's past.

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    I don't find that percentage to be accurate at all. Are you sleeping with girls you wouldn't consider making into your girlfriend? I must be missing something. You try to turn them into relationships but fail or you choose not to make them into relationships 95% of the time.

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    Well, speaking from my own experience, I think it matters much more what type of girls I look for then where I find them.

    Generally, when I've been picking up girls in bars and clubs, I pretty much only went for looks, cuteness and sexiness rather than screening for LTR qualities. I just went for the ones that are great for a one night stand, but not necessarily have any of the qualities that I look for in a LTR.

    When I've been meeting women outside of bars and clubs, I have generally not been looking for a one night stand, and so have been screening a lot more for qualities other than face, body, sex appeal and cuteness.

    I don't know if this is generally true, but for me, the screening factor plays a big role here. If you screen for LTR qualities (which of course is harder if either one of you have been drinking) in bars and clubs, then I definitely think it's possible to have a higher "hit rate". If you don't, then yeah, you have to rely on luck, and if you are as picky as I am with LTR qualities, the chances are pretty slim.

    That being said, I'm in an LTR right now, it's going really great and we are very, very compatible, have great chemistry, lots of love for eachother, a great and mature relationship (even though she is in her early twenties) and she has all the important qualities that I'm looking for in a girl for an LTR. We met in a club (on the dancefloor even), we were both quite drunk, I didn't screen for LTR qualities as I wasn't looking for an LTR (was still married at the time) and it started off as a one-night-stand. We're moving in together in a week, so it definitely works. Just pure luck, but given enough chances, it happens even when you're not screening

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    Truestory, love the grocery analogy. It really makes perfect sense, you shouldn't be going into a bar or a club expecting to walk out with a future LTR.
    However there are the rare occasions when something can spark. I myself just met an older girl at a club a few weeks ago and we have started seeing each other. I don't really expect anything serious to come of it, but that's what makes it fun in the meantime! Every time I start seeing someone, I begin with zero expectations. I may know what I want out of the relationship, but I don't "assume" that things are going to go any way in particular without me deciding they will. Perhaps you're expecting to gain the kind of depth from a bar meeting that you just can't get, at least not with the girls that you've met in the past. Maybe look somewhere else? Practice your day game

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    Quote Originally Posted by kvision View Post
    Truestory, love the grocery analogy. It really makes perfect sense, you shouldn't be going into a bar or a club expecting to walk out with a future LTR.
    However there are the rare occasions when something can spark. I myself just met an older girl at a club a few weeks ago and we have started seeing each other. I don't really expect anything serious to come of it, but that's what makes it fun in the meantime! Every time I start seeing someone, I begin with zero expectations. I may know what I want out of the relationship, but I don't "assume" that things are going to go any way in particular without me deciding they will. Perhaps you're expecting to gain the kind of depth from a bar meeting that you just can't get, at least not with the girls that you've met in the past. Maybe look somewhere else? Practice your day game
    Great answer. 110% agree with what you said. My day game has been great, but I do plenty of fish website and it has really taken off. I come home and I have hot girls emailing me.

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