"Why do you want to meet me?"

Discuss "Why do you want to meet me?" at the Online Game and IMs within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; "Why do you want to meet me?" I've spoke with her online,and we had arranged ...

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    "Why do you want to meet me?"

    I've spoke with her online,and we had arranged date,exchanged numbers....anyway when it was obvious that we are going to meet she gave me this question "why do you want to meet me?"

    I've said what I said,and we met day after that...but this question made me think...this is so fucking obvious qualifying of her,I didn't expected such direct question.

    What is best response? What would you say in this situation?




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    Because you find her interesting and genuinely want to get to know her cos u never know you may end up hating each other.
    That, or simply because you want to fuck her brains out.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ramhotep View Post
    Because you find her interesting and genuinely want to get to know her cos u never know you may end up hating each other.
    That, or simply because you want to fuck her brains out.
    I don't know...this sounds to much stereotype...in afc way...

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    Cause it's more natural for people to interact directly, rather than to sit in front of their computers typing to each other. Accuse her of being an outcast if she prefers to sit at home rather than meet people "IRL" (playfully of course)..

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    Fey
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    There are several possible reasons for her to actually ask you this question.

    1. You didn't qualify her enough beforehand. Which means you should re-qualify, just say something along the line of 'actually... I'm not so sure myself! Now remind me again, do you cook?' bla bla etc

    2. She gained 20 pounds since the picture she sent to you. ha..

    3. She just need some re-affirmation that you genuinely like her as a person and not just looking for casual sex. Something from some of the above posters should do nicely.

    4. She never actually intended it to go this far. Just having some fun online to make her feel good about herself.

    5. She is not comfortable with meeting you cause she thinks you're a creep. just kindding.

    Nobody can really give much advice without more info.
    Think outside the box.. Or better yet, keep expanding yours

    The way you do anything, is the way you do everything

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    J03
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    You gave the answer yourself ... Qualify her off of it.

    She´s throwing out a hoop. DO NOT JUMP! you do not have any/or hardly enough comfort established to give in, even in the least. If you have some comfort established, you can become more ¨human¨ and actually have a ¨normal¨ interaction, where you can jump through hoops. For example, if your 7 year gf asks you to make coffee, you will gladly do it - exaggerated for ease of the example.

    Don´t answer with normal social answers, because you might not have enough attraction established either, otherwise she would not ask that. The flip side is, if she was completely attracted to you, she would be happy to be in your company, right?

    Easiest way is to be uncertain about whether you actually want to get to know her. This should anyway be how you should REALLY be feeling!!

    Now you should be able to come up with responses easily .... if you´re still battling, try something like ¨to find out if you´re interesting¨ ¨I love meeting people, ...¨

    A story at this stage would be fantastic, if you know a lot of routines - stock, or real stories. Maintain the attitude of you being the prize.

    Good luck

    -J

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    Quote Originally Posted by Fey View Post
    1. You didn't qualify her enough beforehand. Which means you should re-qualify,

    Yes,this is the case I'm talking about.

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    Quote Originally Posted by J03 View Post
    You gave the answer yourself ... Qualify her off of it.

    She´s throwing out a hoop. DO NOT JUMP! you do not have any/or hardly enough comfort established to give in, even in the least. If you have some comfort established, you can become more ¨human¨ and actually have a ¨normal¨ interaction, where you can jump through hoops. For example, if your 7 year gf asks you to make coffee, you will gladly do it - exaggerated for ease of the example.

    Don´t answer with normal social answers, because you might not have enough attraction established either, otherwise she would not ask that. The flip side is, if she was completely attracted to you, she would be happy to be in your company, right?

    Very interesting!

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    J03
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    good luck. just work at it. you'll get there.

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