Unrealistic Expectations

[TheSlayer]

Lately I have seen an influx of posts starting with my negs/disqualifiers/teases/routines don’t work. What’s wrong? This is the money question: I just read “The Game ” and TMM and MB or whatever but I am still in the friend zone with my one-itis; what’s wrong? Thirdly, I have been going out quite a lot but I keep on getting blown out, this shit doesn’t work, you guys are a bunch of weirdos and fakes. The problem stems from unrealistic expectations on part of the people who start out. They think reading a couple of routines and some pickup theory should transform them into superstar PUAs, the ones they read about in their books.

After reading Sinn ’s “Game Accelerator”, I realized I do have a slight advantage over all the other PUAs starting out because I am SOCIALIZED. Before you ask any of the three questions that I mentioned above ask yourself this:

1. Are you socialized? What I mean is before getting into the game did you go out with your friends? Were you part of various social circles and what was your status in them? You didn’t have to be the Alpha male but were you at least a Beta male who was somewhat valued by his friends?

2. Have you been around women? Even if it was getting LJBF’ed by the woman of your dreams or whatever, did you have a couple of female friends? Even those experiences help you put things in a better perspective and are a great help when you start out in the field.

3. Have you been sarging actively? Do you post on the forums for sound advice?

4. Have you been in this for < than 6 months? Give yourself at least a solid 6 months to absorb the theory and become socialized if you were not previously. All this will hold true if you actually do go out and sarge with your wings or solo.



The problem with inexperienced PUAs and I myself was guilty of this mindset is that we think read a couple of routines, know the theory, and start banging the 9s and the 10s. Fortunately I had an epiphany as soon as I got into this mindset and realized that I am a socialized guy. All I need to do is start going out, develop more social intuition, and just slog it out. If you were one of the guys who actually spent his whole day playing his Xbox , PS3 or other PC games, you are not going to get SPECTACULAR results right away. Getting socialized and developing social intuition takes time and you should consider that when you think about your learning curve.

Another frequent question on the forums that need to be addressed is how to turn my friend into my gf? Well, for one getting out of the zone is extremely hard and the “gurus” are right when they say it’s wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy easier to do a cold approach and get a bang than it is to get out of the zone. After you read this theory don’t go after your one-itis right away. Go out and get some approaches and numbers and lays under your belt. The skills needed to get out of the zone are frankly quite advanced and you should aim to develop them first.

With anything in life there is always a learning curve and this is no different. Diving into this head first is a good way to approach this; expecting to lay the 9s and 10s right away is not. Anytime you have questions like my looks are shit or this shit is fake, ask yourself one of the 4 questions and you will probably get your answer.

This is the definitive work on pickup and dating theory, written by an acknowledged master of the game - a guy who’s TRAINED many of the new “gurus” on the scene!

[CMPitts]

Good post, needed to be said.

[TheSlayer]

Thanks Pitts, most newbies should ask themselves those 4 questions and answer honestly they will see a lot of the common misconceptions.

[ninx]

Yeah bro, you're right about the high expectations, if i fail misserably on an approch, i kinda have a hurt feeling, and i think, f*k this sh*t, im not doing this again.. then after a bit i feel like the aproch was kind of an anesthetic and i would approch again, but at the same time thinking i will just get hurt again.

about the 4 questions:
for the first, i have been SOMEWHAT socialized. i mean i had some friends i would chat most with, but they werent high value, and where people who would avoid the popular people. I have hung out with Cool, social people as well, but not too much, and when i was with them, they would be nice to me, and between themselves they were joking around, tesing, etc. i couldnt.

and i didnt really have girls that were just friends either too much, like close girl friends.

im trying to cath up with that.

[Menalvagor]

Its always a good idea to think back to situations where you demonstrated a lot of social value before even discovering the community. If you find that after answering those 4 questions that you are socialized you must've at some point displayed natural aspects of solid inner game . I.e think back the night you attracted your first girlfriend and the ones after her you will find that all of this has some primal origin and that most men already posess this skill we must just enhance it. Try to get in the same state as when you were in the above mentioned situations.

[L_P]

On the oneitis thing...
I suspect being seen to be successful with, or even just interested in/pursuing other women may actually help long term with getting out of the LJBF zone.

[TheSlayer]

On the oneitis thing...
I suspect being seen to be successful with, or even just interested in/pursuing other women may actually help long term with getting out of the LJBF zone.

Yes, exactly. You should get approaches, numbers, and lays under your belt before you go after your LJBF or ex-oneitis. Getting hard out of the zone is hard and the skills have to be developed. Most guys read the material and think they will go after their one-itis. Doesn't work like that. Also, you should go after your her only once when you have successfully sarged a girl who is just as pretty. So, if your LJBF girl is an 8, go after her after you have successfully sarged an 8+.

[Menalvagor]

Yes, exactly. You should get approaches, numbers, and lays under your belt before you go after your LJBF or ex-oneitis. Getting hard out of the zone is hard and the skills have to be developed. Most guys read the material and think they will go after their one-itis. Doesn't work like that. Also, you should go after your her only once when you have successfully sarged a girl who is just as pretty. So, if your LJBF girl is an 8, go after her after you have successfully sarged an 8+.

I totally agree I tried using material to my oneitis and did not get the response I wanted. Yes sarging other girls is a great idea aswell as an avatar change and total approach change.