Discuss Do guys like it when girls text / rarely text? at the Newbie Discussion Forum within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; Do guys like it when girls text / rarely text?
I have a ...
Do guys like it when girls text / rarely text?
I have a question for you. I am a girl, obviously. I'm just wondering how you guys feel about texting. I am the type who RARELY texts unnecessarily. I'll text after a date - the night of or the next day - to say thanks, i had fun, or something like that, but it doesn't even occur to me to text during the week, like some people do, like "hope you have a nice day" or even "what's up" or whatever people text during the week. I have no idea what other girls are doing, because this is not the kind of thing i do. I usually only text if i have a question, or if we're arranging to go somewhere.
I'm just curious, how would guys feel about that if they liked a girl? would you WANT a girl who does that? would that make you intrigued?
Don't get me wrong, i do NOT act that way because i'm playing hard to get. not at all. it's just that it doesn't even occur to me!
because today my friend was telling me about a guy she JUST started dating (they actually went on like one or two dates last week) and she's telling me she and him texted him yesterday and they texted back and forth, how are you doing and so forth. She asked me whether or not she she text him tonight that she's thinking about him.
To me, i wouldn't text something like that. to me that seems clingy. too much too soon. what do you think? i mean, do you guys like that? she and the guy texted yesterday all day. i told her, why does she need to text him the very next day? i just don't get it.
Youre in a minority Beth, most girls text incessantly. And if she did that, its a major ioi to the guy; which would and for me it would set off the alarm bells that this girl could be a bit of a stalker, you never know though; depends on the guy. Good luck to you and your friend!
like what do girls text?!?!
(i obviously have no idea because i'm not on the receiving end)
ps. i might think "stalker" too!
Braddock has this down to a science honestly, so it may come across as a bunch of jargon. Girls like to keep everything playful, as I am sure you may well know. They like everything to be fun an inmature, as opposed to mature and serious usually (girls my age that is). They just banter back and forth like you would with a guy you were flirting with. That kinda thing
You may not be much of a texter, but I don't think that's really the issue. Texting is just one way for people to communicate. Nowadays everyone texts. Before texts it was house calls from a land line (Ah the 90's). Before phones people wrote letters. The mediums have changed, but the emotional content hasn't. If you like someone, you want to talk to them and you want to hear from them. If you like the guy enough, you'll text him. That's the bottom line.
But to answer your question, yes, guys like it when the girl texts them, but it also depends on the situation. Like your friend for example, if a girl I'd only gone out with a couple times was texting me saying she was thinking of me, it wouldn't be so much about how many dates we'd gone on, but whether I'd slept with her or not, honestly. If the first two dates were awesome and we'd already had sex, then it wouldn't seem like that big of a deal to me. It would be kinda nice, actually. If the dates were only so-so, and we hadn't gotten physical yet, then it would definitely be a red flag to me. Not a huge one, but it would still register on my clinger radar.
If I were dating a girl like you, I wouldn't think you were very interested. A girl who only texts to set up dates and never just to talk or flirt gives me the vibe that she's sorta interested, but not really and is only keeping her options open. If that's the message that you're trying to send, great. But if you really do like the guy, then sending a little text "just because" will let him know where things are at.
I think in the beginning you want to try to hold back a bit from texting too much, but some people feel like they hit it off really fast and then wind up in constant contact with each other. I think over time, you start getting used to it, so when the time comes that one of you decides not to respond back right away, the other's freaking out over what's wrong.
Set the tone of how much dialog you want to have going from the beginning. Eventually, people run out of things to say, and when the well is dry in a matter of weeks or months, then what?
Some people consider it hard to get, but I consider it avoiding burnout. I piss people off because I'll turn my phone off and it goes to voicemail, but when they get used to me doing that, it becomes a minor annoyance, or just get used to it.
I would tell your friend to "save some for later". After 2-3 texts, if her bf has something to say, they should just talk to each other. And by the same token, if you're texting away and you're supposed to be having fun with your friends on a night out, you're somewhere else, which annoys them.
For example, I like when a girl texts me, not too much, but enough to know that she is interested...
If she contacts me only to set up the meeting Im not sure if i created enough attraction...
here is one thing i hate:
-when i text a girl,and she replies the next the day
-she texts me but fails to answer my calls (maybe too shy,i don't know)
-she hardly sends me a text when we are dating but always expect me to send her one to respond.
if u at least text me from time to time,I can know what's going on from there...
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