Discuss Tempus here at the Introductions within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; Tempus here Hey guys, I'm Tempus. And here's my story. I had used DYD products ...
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- 07-31-2008, 06:23 PM #1
Hey guys, I'm Tempus. And here's my story.
I had used DYD products since I was 19. I simply used the e-Book and the DYD videos and VOILA I had a girlfriend. I made the terrible decision that I knew everything there was to know... typical teenage years
I was a very energetic guy with the deep-routed belief that I was invincible. No rejection or physical feat was out of scope (within reason, of course). I wrestled and rock climbed as hobbies and, when times were down, I would rock climb just for the flush of energy that would flow through my body for accomplishing such a grand feat.
Well, three months after meeting her, my gf was acting strange, saying that one of our trusted friends (a guy) said that I was saying things about her behind her back. I fell for it all line, hook, and sinker and became the worst AFC you could imagine. Well, long story short, one night I was chasing after my crying gf, afraid that she was going to hurt herself (I was too naive to see that I was being played). I was struck by a car in the hip by a drunk driver and then, promptly, broke up with my girlfriend.
The only thing I did right was tell her I didn't want friends like her.
Without the ability to play sports for a while due to a bruised hip bone, I was confined to simple tasks like walking. I couldn't even go for a jog without hurting, so a HUGE part of my identity was broken, as I took pride in my limberness.
I lived on campus and rumors were spread. I basically lived in a very toxic environment for about a year. The same guy who was telling her this "relationship advice" wound up hooking up with her in her vulnerable state... and then I was told by my "friends" around me that I had no right to be angry and that I was basically a creepy chump who would never be successful with women.
I believed them.
There's a lush nature reservation near where I live. One night, I was at my wits end and hiked out to my favorite rock face. A waterfall flowed alongside the craggy mountain. It had just rained the night before, so the waterfall was flowing mightily. The mist could be felt off my face. I started climbing the jagged rock face... showing myself that I could STILL do anything I wanted to. I still remember reaching for that one cone-shaped rock as my hip gave way. I grabbed on tight to the rock, hoping it would suffice.
It came loose. I was hanging on the rock face by one arm all scratched up on my right side. It was dark in the middle of the forest, so I knew no one was going to hear me. So much for thinking things through. The thought of the car slamming into my leg flashed through my mind... the failure... as I fell into the darkness below and fell deep into the reservoir below the waterfall.
Ironic. I had just watched "The Count of Monte Cristo", too.
I woke up a bit later floating in the reservoir and pulled myself onto the rocks that accompanied the shore. I looked up into the sky where I could clearly make out bright stars and the partly covered moon. I questioned why I was still there... alive... looking up at those gorgeous stars and moon...
Then I remembered my condition. I felt myself over for injuries. I thoroughly checked my scalp, my neck, my backbone, my ribs, then my limbs. Nope, other than the scratches on my right side, a few pains where I had struck against rocks on the way down, and left bruised hipbone (which was already there), I didn't have any bad injuries. I got checked out later that week and all I had done was just agitate my hip bone. That night I knew there just HAD to be a reason I was alive. I'm a bit agnostic, so I didn't think of it in a spiritual way. I knew that the state I was in was no way to live and had set out to change it.
One traumatic experience made me lose hope, another gained it. I have made a 180 degree turn in my attitude.
I've studied Psycho-Cybernetics, "dark psychology" (involving certain subconscious facets), and other sciences for about two years alongside of DYD and MM products. As a result, I ran into debt, but it's the best choice I've made for myself yet.
- 07-31-2008, 06:32 PM #2
I'm still quite energetic, but in a more mature manner. I still like to study psych, but more along the lines of self-psych and group-psych rather than NLP stuff. I've tried it and it doesn't feel good, even if I'm genuinely angry and wish to use it.
Although I've studied a lot of psychology to improve my mindset and beliefs (along with getting a new reference group), I know that there is still much for me to learn. So please feel free to leave constructive criticism whenever I post. After two years of study and field-testing, I've made great leaps and bounds regarding my "personal evolution", as David D likes to put it.
I'm very good at breaking harmful or limiting beliefs since I had to break LOTS before I was good enough to go out in the field again. I'm also very good at "talking to my subconscious", or rather setting things from Conscious Competence to Unconscious Competence rapidly through a process I've developed using what I've studied in psych. By rapidly, I mean within 21 days, with the only drawback being that I need to pretty much seek validation of those ideas to make sure they're actually good. This is the major reason why I'll post some ideas or food-for-thought here.
I consider myself weak when it comes to *how* to show vulnerability, especially to women. After all, my experiences have stung me and the only way to break such anxiety is to just feel the fear and do it anyway. I've also done a lot of dating, but haven't had an interest in relationships until recently, so I'm currently weak in the step between what MM would call S3 and the relationship zone.
(I also realize that I've posted way too much. lol. But I decided to post the story above in case any newbies read it, believing that they can't attain the level of success they wish for due to the shit they've been through. This post down here is the usual personal intro )
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