Introduction & my story

Introduction & my story

Discuss Introduction & my story at the Introductions within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; Introduction & my story Hey. I live in St. Louis, MO. I've been wanting to ...

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  1. #1
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    Introduction & my story

    Hey. I live in St. Louis, MO. I've been wanting to share some thoughts I'd had recently and I wasn't exactly sure where to put them. So since I had never posted here before, I decided that maybe this would be the most appropriate place, since I just wanted to tell a bit of my story and where I am now. I warn you now, it's likely not that exciting.

    I am 31 years old. I am also the very definition of an AFC, with a "batting average" of only 5. I suppose I could puff up the number if I included the odd oral-only incidents or whatever else, but it's 5 with regards to actual sex. Though the total is low, I have had some fairly adventurous partners. I've had a threesome with 2 girls. But I have also felt worthless much of my life, out of step with women and with people in general. Uncomfortable with myself, believing I was stupid & ugly, I obviously had zero self confidence. And I hated everyone. Not only was I the guy in the corner, sipping his beer by himself, scared to interact, but I looked pissed off.

    About 3 years ago, and after a couple of big heartbreaks, I read "The Game" on a total fluke. Like everyone else I was enthralled and blew through it almost overnight. I thought what I'd read was interesting, but then I fell in love again and I guess I just sort of filed it away for the future. In the ensuing months, I finally realized that I'd spent the bulk of my adult life in a deep depression. That realization helped me start making sense of things. Knowing and coming to terms with it seemed to lift something off my shoulders. Friends and family began noting that I seemed happier than I'd been in a very long time, maybe ever. I hadn't really noticed, but once people started telling me this stuff it had a small snowball effect. I still wasn't a ladykiller, but I began wanting to go out more and expose myself to good food, beer, music, people.

    Also, turning 30 had a major effect on me, drawing me closer to my very-tight-knit group of friends. One of these friends is what would probably be called a "natural." I'll call him "Nick". "Nick" wasn't a "natural" in high school when we first became friends. But within a couple of years of graduation, Nick had gone off to school and his number started to grow exponentially. There is a longer story as to how he reached his mindstate, some personal issues and such, but that's his story. The point is that through the years, while I was in and out of long term lockdowns, he was my male-whore friend, the guy whose stories I longed to hear so I might live vicariously through them. At the same time, my envy would often make me feel something resembling anger towards him. I would, on occassion, ask him for advice. It was always "be confident in yourself, believe in yourself. Nobody is going to think anything of you if you don't think anything of yourself." This makes sense to me now, but at the time it was the dumbest thing I'd ever heard. The fuck kind of advice is that? So I decided that no matter what he said it was really mostly about the looks. He's around 6 feet tall; I'm 5'6". He was a pretty slim guy, a cross country runner back in the day; I am stocky at best, chubby at worst. So there was little hope for me unless I dieted and sprouted 5 inches of leg in my late twenties, which seemed unlikely.

    Then I read "The Venusian Arts Handbook." What interested me most and convinced me that Mystery wasn't a snake oil salesman was the tireless research behind it, and even more than that, the science. He explained it in layman's terms and the more I read, the more I thought "Well, duh. This makes perfect fucking sense!" I started paying more attention to my friend "Nick". I listened to his stories with a slightly more trained ear. I heard the cocky-funny sense of humor he'd always had since I'd known him, since we were 14. I could see how he "negged" girls, how he acted like he didn't give a shit whether he took them home or not because most of the time he really didn't give a shit. The old addage "plenty of fish in the sea" was not a cliche to him, it was gospel. And he didn't know all this stuff because he read it in a book or on a message board. This was just who he is.

    Seeing all this with new eyes made it real to me. I started lurking on this message board, looking for more material. I decided to start small. For me, this meant concentrating on three steps: making eye contact when speaking to someone, smiling A LOT more (compared to looking suicidal all the time), and being as relaxed as humanly possible. Almost immediately I began to see some results. I wasn't opening cold sets, but just when interacting with coworkers or when being introduced by a friend to someone else, there was an undeniable change. People started telling me how funny or smart I was. All my life I had been one of the smart kids, and I'd had this quick, occasionally biting wit and somehow I never really knew it.

    I don't want anyone to think this was an overnight miracle cure. I still have bouts of depression, and I still can walk into a bar and walk right back out 20 minutes later because I just don't have it that night. But the success I was having was like a thousand little moments of clarity.

    So, maybe two months ago, I decided I had achieved some success (but more importantly to me, a deeper understanding of how these things work to my advantage) and it was time to step it up a bit. I needed to try to develop my flirting skills a little. Due to the fact that I do have a quick and caustic wit, I decided to start trying to neg and portray more of a cocky-funny persona. Because I am a restaurant server, I am not only interacting with different people all day every day, but I am always around young, pretty, impressionable female coworkers. And so I started practicing on them.

    This story has already turned into an endless ramble, so I won't sidebar into a bunch of individual stories here. But in a nutshell, the last few weeks have been particularly rewarding. After an impromptu and relatively unexpected make-out session with an 18-year-old hostess in a dark corner of the restaurant, she came back up to "visit" me a few days later and I recieved a quick, and sadly incomplete, blow job in a closet. Most recently, I was intriduced to a coworkers sister. When I met her the second time, she was with her boyfriend. I spent that entire evening running plays right out of the playbook I had planned earlier in the anticipation of her being there, and they worked to a stunning degree. Right up to the end of the night when, even as I had my hand all over her ass a foot and a half away from her boyfriend, she left to go him with him. (quick sidenote - i was texting my buddy "Nick" that night, bragging about how close I had come. He jokingly chastised me, basically letting me know I had no reason to gloat. At first this really made me mad, but eventually I understood that he was right and I was able to change my mindset and resolve to make some fixes the next time). I chalked it up.....but sure enough, just a few days ago, she drunkenly called me and invited me over. The evening ended about three hours later, but not until after I had recieved the best head I have ever recieved in my life. We also have plans to hang out on Saturday night, so I should be able to close the deal at that point.

    If you're still reading this, I admire your resolve. Just a few quick things I want to sum up with. I still have much work to do. Inner game still needs a ton of attention, and I am not doing cold approaches at all. But I can see a time where that will come. I am going at my own pace and adjusting according to my comfort level. The most valuable thing I have come to realize is that the best thing to do is not to use canned openers. You have to take who you are and project it. Use your natural gifts. Be open to new experiences. Realize that I do not suck nearly as much as I ever thought I did. And I also learned that girls between 18 and 25 really love guys over 30.

    Thanks for reading.

    E
    Last edited by Funcrusher; 06-20-2008 at 02:06 AM.



  2. #2
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    That's pretty fucking long-winded, man.
    I edited and chopped up mine like four times before I got comfortable with posting it, and it's only about a 13th as long as yours.

    Nice story though.
    Same thing happened to me. I just discovered and read "The Game" over just the past week and it blew my mind. There's a fucking secret society dedicated to this shit? No way! And I actually thought of developing my own system the way Mystery did... before I found the book, I mean.
    Granted, the Mystery Method turned him into one of the most sexually powerful men in the world, but I don't care enough to take it as far as he did.

    I also think canned openers are shit. I've been brainstorming my own technique lately, building off of what little "The Game" had to offer for some insight.
    I'm young (20 y/o), so I have the time and energy. And I'm a sharp guy with enough social skills as it is. I'm just new to pick-up.

  3. #3
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    Hey Funcrusher - great story. Your story quite similar to mine except I am a bit older - 42. Its a real struggle for me - Im on the shorter side as well around 5'7 -5'8", but slim, dress well, witty - I have inner game issues that need to be worked on. I have a terrible time with women in general even with all the study and women under 30 are just not possible right now....I wish you well. I live in the Chicago area so if you ever up this way, just shot me a PM or something. Enjoy our weekend.

  4. #4
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    heh, I'm the same way. i have a tendency to not be concise enough myself. Good luck dude.

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