Discuss HELP: Girlfriend/Sarging Crisis at the General Discussion within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; HELP: Girlfriend/Sarging Crisis
I'm having something of a personal issue at the moment. I broke ...
HELP: Girlfriend/Sarging Crisis
I'm having something of a personal issue at the moment. I broke up with a girlfriend a couple of years ago and shortly afterwards I discovered the sarging and PUA community. I had a great time touring the bars and opening, and I was beginning to get pretty good at it, having some success.
After about six months I put what I'd learned into practice with a high quality lady who I have now been with for a over a year. She's absolutely awesome; she's pretty, has a good family, a good job, lots of ambition, cooks, watches me on the Playstation without complaining, will do pretty much anything in the sack, is respectful, the list goes on.
Stay with me, I'm getting to a point.
I miss sarging. I miss meeting lots of girls and I miss flirting without feeling guilty or wondering who's watching. I miss having the time to do these things. The list of things I miss also goes on.
In addition, I'm about to leave my job and go to university, a PUA's dream territory. She's even going to move so we can continue living together.
What the hell am I supposed to do? I have this wonderful woman who will support me in every way imaginable while I'm back in education, yet I can't help thinking about the other opportunities which will present themselves and I will struggle to ignore. I feel like a bad person for feeling this way. And even though the relationship is largely excellent, we do have these blazing arguments, and every now and then I catch myself wondering if "this fight" will and the relationship and wonder if that will be a good thing. Sometimes I wonder how good a pua I could have been had I not stopped. On the other hand, sarging help me to get a fantastic woman, so it did its job.
Will I continue the relationship?
Will I finish it and go through the once-in-a-lifetime uni experience as a free and single man, while breaking a wonderful lady's heart?
Will I give in to my primal instincts and do a little of each at the risk of getting caught and destroying her heart?
I'm sure lots of people reading this have been in situations which are at least similar. Please pour out your advice and experience, heaven knows I need it.
Thanks in advance.
To be honest, if you really miss sarging, something's missing from the relationship. Funny enough, I was feeling the same way a few years ago, when everything was perfect in my relationship, still missed something. And that's where I started to read The Game, and got involved in the community pretty darn fast. So I'd say, your problem is nothing special - sorry to put it that way, but that's what I think. We, males are biologically programmed to spread our genes in the broadest area possible, that's evolution. When we see a gorgeous girl, we put our foot on the gas, and go-go-go, until we get the stop sign or the red lights (double entendre, haha).
You are still young, have lots of opportunity, but you are afraid, that this is the perfect relationship and you will blow it. Trust me, there's no perfect relationship. If you're good with girls and cool in a relationship, you'll get a bunch of more near-perfect relationships anyway. So I'd say, go and experience the juice of life.
Love is a game that two can play and both win.
Tough one man. The best I can do is talk from experience so here goes.
If your feeling this way already, it's probably not going to change. It'll likely get worse. In my experience, as soon as the first thought of 'this sucks' pops into your head, then your on your way out, even if it takes years.
Your going to university, and she is moving with you so you can stay together. I can't stress enough how bad an idea this was for me to do with my ex. If she is moving away with you, thats a big ass commitment, even if your choosing not to look at it like that. Your going to university with big aspirations. Good times, lots of drink and nights out, free time, making new friends, best friends, beginning a new life and making the most of your last years of freedom. By moving together, her aspirations will begin and end with you. This wouldn't be so bad if A) you hadn't already been having blazing arguments and B) you weren't already feeling insecure about your commitment/relationship.
DON'T feel guilty. You need to make a decision for you AND her, or I promise there WILL be trouble later, trouble that could go on for years and tarnish your whole good time at university. I've been there buddy. It's not pretty.
And trust me man, if you miss sarging, your gonna get to uni and be surrounded by opportunities and temptations. You sound lucky to have met a sweet girl, but shes one of a billion out there man.
Please god don't do what I did.
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