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Yesterday, I finally met up with a girl I've been ...
Getting rid of buyers remorse?
Yesterday, I finally met up with a girl I've been talking to on the phone for a little over a week. She's extremely gorgeous, an easy 8 by my standards and we hit it off right away. I escalated kino, I took her to different venues and four hours into the evening, we were passionately making out on the beach. Here's the kicker - she lives with her parents and I live an hour away. Going to either place was out of the question and sadly, I think our make out session in the car back to her house got a little too intense. Talking to her on the phone today, she was cold and unresponsive, an obvious sign of some buyer's remorse.
I tried not to come off sexual or even bring up being intimate with her and she sent me a few flirty texts, but unlike we agreed last night, she is "busy" and doesn't want to come see me anymore this week.
Gentlemen, how do I deal with this tragic case of buyer's remorse?
honestly bro...just move to another chic..if she really wants you she'll make it happen....
well patient this seems like an obvious case of buyers remorse what i would have done is before you made out say "im trying real hard not to kiss you right now" or whenever the makeing out gets more intense throw in a role reversal like "i dont think we should rush things" or suddenly push her away "im not that kinda guy" whenever she touches you somewhere new... what im tying to say is play with her a bit using (cat string theory) women want what they cant have... you gave in too quickly and escalated fast which caused buyers remorse
my opinion is sarge on and find a new hb and foget this one... becareful not to catch (one itis) thats another deadly disease to pua's
Doctor Alpha (haha)
Thanks for the quick reply guys - I'm not worried about one-itis, it just sucks to be self-realizing of your mistakes and not knowing how to fix it. I'll try running a little attraction tomorrow to see if she picks it up, but I'm not too enthusiastic about it.
buyers remorse is hard to fix with texting, nearly impossible from my experience. I avoid buyers remorse by taking a lot of time entertaining them, kino, sexual tension, being charming, a lot of bouncing. Average 4-5 hours.
Then you have to f-close if you are really making out hardcore. No such thing as a failed f-close is a good thing. It just makes it awkward. Only acceptable way is if you both are being interrupted and experience something together like a cop knocking on your window. something you both can laugh about it later.
Anyway, when you meet a girl and you think you have a chance of making out and have sex with, plan beforehead. If you don't have any place to have sex, stay at light makeout and settle for day 2.
I totally agree with those who say to move on. you Kissed. You Number closed.
So as old Meatloaf sings
"Now don't be sad, 'cos 2 out of 3 aint bad".
You were the girl that nobody could own. Stay for a while, then you would leave me alone
But i'm something different, aint like the rest
How does it feel to find out you're failing your own test? cause I stole your love, Aint never gonna let you go. (Paul Stanley. - Kiss)
The key to understanding every problem, is to work out exactly what the problem is.
Buyer's remorse is a term that describes many things: Guilt, fear, regret,remorse,feeling like a slut, confusion etc..
The key to reversing B.R- I would assume- is to individually reverse every 'bad' feeling that the woman might be experiencing after her encounter with you.
1-For the sake of academia, I'm going to list say the obvious: In the future, if you can, AVOID it.
2- HOWEVER, if it happens, go all the way back to A2 and DHV heavily (but easy on the negs). When you're getting IOIs again, Qualify her again with something non-sexual. DON'T MAKE IT SEEM LIKE YOU'RE AFTER SEX. You have a better chance of getting her back on board by inviting her to a birthday party, then inviting her back to your place for some 'quality time'. Your next date should be non-threatening,non-sexual and preferably in a public place. If you don't get laid on day 2, it's ok. Patience is the key. When you're in a comfortable enviroment, go for the seduction again.
Speaking of environments, I am going to be posting my D.C.R (Direct Counter Resistance) theory on LMR and Buyer's Remore soon, and that will contain key components that you need to have set up in order to achieve S3 and prevent an early failed attempts.
From reading that therory, you will realise that 'heavy make outs' in the back of you car actually INCREASE your chances of losing the girl as opposed to a romantic spot - such a candle lit room for example. Remember, a woman doesn't want to FEEL cheap the next day...
The conclusion is, if it's risky: Don't seduce.
PS: I have a duty to tell you- I never managed to overcome Buyer's Remorse and since I became a PUA, I've never had to deal with it. But it would be worth a try. Again, Good Luck.