Discuss How much does personality come in to this? at the General Discussion within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; How much does personality come in to this?
Now, I'm not using this as any ...
How much does personality come in to this?
Now, I'm not using this as any kind of excuse. I think anyone can improve their game if they are willing to put the effort in. Simply going up to lots of women is going to improve your chances by the law of averages. If you then add in some PUA theory - push/pull, cocky & funny, role playing etc you're on to a winner.
But I do think personality plays a role in all of this. In my opinion, there are two types of guys. The first type of guy is probably going to do better at social circle game. He likes women but is reluctant to go up and talk to them in a club or bar. He needs to push himself into chatting to women in such places. If he puts in the required effort he can get some good results. He might even enjoy being the centre of attention in a bar. And if he has a string of successes he might convince himself that he likes cold approaching. But he knows in his heart of hearts that cold approaching is a chore for him. He'd rather meet women through friends and family.
The second kind of guy has a more extrovert character. He enjoys chatting to women on the street and in the subway. Its fun; it makes his day more interesting. If he sees a hot girl he can't control himself - he has to go up and say hello. Usually, this kind of guy has a high libido and loves experiencing new things. I know a few guys like this and they are much more interested in women and sex than the average guy.
Now, I would hazard a guess that most of us here fit into the first profile.
That doesn't mean that we can't have success with women, but we constantly have to push ourselves. And we are more likely to come up with excuses for not approaching that hot woman. Whereas the second guy would have made the approach without even thinking.
What do you think? Do you think personality is a predicator of how good you are at approaching? Just interested in getting some views.
You start out as the first guy, and over time become the second guy. Short and sweet.
The game is pretty much played in comfort. Alot of people make the mistake of spending time in attraction cuz the IOIs are fun, etc etc.
Basically, I think both will do equally well, as long as they have a great personality to convey to the girl through comfort. The second one may do better in building attraction, but attraction is only a small part of the game.
Have you ever thought what would happen to the social circle guy if he had no resources left to meet women? He ll probably start approaching women he doesnt know. So be good on everything.
The Mystery Method allows you to fake it 'til you make it. It's all about developing a personality that you can use to go meet women and be successful. It sets out a basic rubric for what you want to become, and if you are already that person before you pick up the book, it will help to teach you what you are doing wrong and how you can fix it. For me, I'm very extraverted and love talking to people. I would go as far as to say I thrive on social interaction, so going up and talking to girls wasn't a big deal. I was a natural before I read TMM and The Game, but I developed my skills and have much greater success from what I learned about social interactions from Mystery.