Thread: Compliments 101
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01-13-2008, 12:40 AM #1
So i've been doing some experimenting the past weekend and a half in compliments. We all know approach compliments are terrible, but after watching some Keys to the VIP and reading up on direct game, I gave it some thought and figured some good compliment techniques.
IMO, the BIGGEST key to the compliment is the context through which it is said, and your preselection status prior to giving a compliment.
Let me go into pre-selection compliment status. This one is pretty easy... if you're standing with 4 girls who fuck you and are also high status, when you give a girl a compliment, it is GOLD.
If you're on your own, are a stranger, and are ugly, you're just trying to butter her up.
So what is the problem here... we all know this... how do we get around it? Fact, is when a compliment is done RIGHT, it is really helpful in advancing the stage and such.
Here is what every person should be doing when giving compliments... and they shouldn't be afraid to experiment giving these out.
Disguise your compliments. This is elementary. Just make sure when you give one to her, it's on your own terms. Girls are always searching for approval, and once they have your conscious approval through a compliment, they get bored and move on to see if they can get a compliment from an even higher status man. However, if a girl does not consciously realize you're giving her a compliment, you'll be great.
So how is this done?... the biggest issue is how to disguising it. Here are some techniques i've found.
1. As said millions of times, don't give her an obvious compliment. There are times for somewhat obvious compliments, but ALWAYS be specific. If it is a very general compliment, it will suck, and won't have much of an effect. IE, you're cool, or you're hot, or you're awesome.
2. Use compliments as a reaction to her qualification, or something conversationally that came up.
3. Disqualify the compliment AFTER you say it. I LOVE this technique. I've tried it within just opening a set a few times, and it's golden. Why? because it accomplishes the initial goal of the compliment, but makes her want more and try to achieve more from you. So what do you do? Make a compliment, then imply that you dont give out compliments often, and she in some way hasn't earned it or doesn't deserve it.
ex: "I don't give out compliments very often, and you certainly don't deserve it, but you have gorgeous eyes. Are you german?" (I used this on a two set who looked like sisters over the weekend. They were hooked.)
Another weekend example: (when on phone) I wasn't drunk when I texted you last night. Believe me, I think you're great, but I certainly wasn't trying to impress you.
Make sure you emphasize that she "CERTAINLY" doesn't deserve it.
4. Dont wait for a reaction. EVER. To further aid this, Try not to let a girl give you a verbal reaction that YOU react to.
EX: You have really good fashion sense....where do you shop, polaris?
EX: You know, that's a very interesting topic you brought up. Much deeper than what most party girls talk about. You seem smart, I think you and I have too much in common however.
EX: You have a great presence about yourself, did that come from your dad's side of the family? ---> fluff.
5. Use compliments that imply that they're not coming directly from you. Tread lightly here. Make SURE you imply it's not coming from you. Once again, this opens a girl up to receiving future compliments, makes her feel more aloof, and will want her coming back for more. It implies she hasn't won you over yet.
EX: Everyone in here thinks you're the shit, I dont know whats up with that, but if they say all assume it's true, who knows, maybe it is?
EX: My friend says you have a really unique sense of caring. Is this true?
Anybody notice a common theme here?
Giving an effective compliment is simply a matter of embedding. Just like our DHV stories in which we imbed our material, we are imbedding compliments into every part of the game without implying anything personal relating to us.
We are imbedding qualification statements, cold reads, openers, hook questions, and other types of material.
01-13-2008, 08:44 AM #2
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these are pretty much "negs" that you're talking about? its a back-handed compliment.