Date Beautiful Women 4.2.1
Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 11 to 19 of 19
Like Tree9Likes
Discuss What to do when you finally grow tired of the whole thing. at the General Discussion within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; How about writing some reports of situations you've got close, but buckled at the last ...
  1. #11
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Gender:
    Posts
    1,260
    Thanks
    12
    Thanked 22 Times in 20 Posts
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    How about writing some reports of situations you've got close, but buckled at the last moment from?

    If we know more about how you're playing in the field, we could perhaps highlight some areas that are turning the women off.
    What do you think are your main sticking points? Aside from motivation - which only you can deal with.


    Example of DHV: I show her my AngryBirds score
    Example of DLV: She shows me hers...

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Gender:
    Age
    28
    Posts
    165
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Been there, gotten a tshirt. I still consider myself afc, just with a spurt of good luck. An anomaly I've learned since I've started reading into all of this is the less you seem you're trying the better results you have. The nights I've gone out to bars srictly for the purpose of "sarging" I usually just end up drunk and with some money drained out of my account. Anymore I just think when I approach "well let me see if this opener works" or "lets see how long I can talk to these new people before I piss them off" A lot of times I will specifically tell a girl I'm trying to get into her pants, but its the way the words are presented. I'm not creepy about it, or showing that I'm trying to get laid. I just throw it out as if its something on my mind and she can either accept it or ratify it. Worst case scenerio she isn't interested and I go back to one of my regulars or I just fuck my fist that night to japanese girls getting plowed...no biggie

    It sounds to me as if you may be coming across needy. When you come across as needy you're also coming across as a guy thats not confident. I've heard so many women say lack of confidence is the BIGGEST turn off to women. I generally go overboard to arrogant, but I just don't have the time to give a shit. For awhile my buddies that I talk to I would always bring up women and gaming and such. We can talk about it on here, but don't make it your life. People will recognize this, and its unattractive. Take a step back from the community for a bit. You've probably read enough material you know how the structure works and its imbedded in your mind. Let it come out naturally...trust me it will happen. The gyst of the story is don't let this stuff consume you, which it sounds like it is. Step back for a moment, find some other hobbies, and when you're ready go out with the mentality of "well let me see what happens if I do this" These women know you're gaming them, but don't make it come across as some serious thing. 9 times out of 10, if you start gaming them properly instead of thinking "this guy is creepy" they will think "this is a fun guy, I'm intrigued" and at that point your better off than 90% of the guys out there.

    Hopefully that helps in some way, I tried to trim off the fat and just get straight to the point. And something that just came to mind, try this. Once you get attraction, show a willingness to walk away or try a jealously plotline. I don't think this stuff is too too difficult. If something isn't working for you, don't do that thing. Simple enough

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Gender:
    Location
    Madrid
    Age
    38
    Posts
    83
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by Maverick76 View Post
    How about writing some reports of situations you've got close, but buckled at the last moment from?

    If we know more about how you're playing in the field, we could perhaps highlight some areas that are turning the women off.
    What do you think are your main sticking points? Aside from motivation - which only you can deal with.
    First of all, thanks for being interested in 'fixing' me.
    My guess is that apart from motivation which i definitely lack, the main problem is that i do not ACT when i see clear opportunities. I mean, most of the time i'm willing to talk to women but when i see a woman showing some kind of interest, i tend to panic.
    I usually sarge solo during the day. I can talk to women, get them interested, get digits, etc.

    I'm also really afraid of interacting with women when friends are around. I feel there's too much at stake. Like i'm risking too much to do it. I don't like to be 'observed', if she rejects me, then all my friends will see that and i will feel even worse.

    I guess my inner game needs work.

    Last nite we went out with friends. What a horrible night. First of all i drank too much. We went to a bar, we started drinking, I was feeling like doing approaches and talking to people. I was kinda anxious. I started talking to chics and they would reject me instantly. I would talk to many different groups. I thiought i did this just to impress my friends. I did not impress them much for the interactions would not last very long. I was being shutdown quickly. I started feeling frustrated. Then we went to a club. More alcohol. We danced and fooled around. Then i did such a lame move, i chose the ugliest and fatest girl in a group and started dancing with her. I don't exactly know why i did this. I guess i thought it was an easy thing to do. God help me. After a couple of minutes, one of her friends came and took her away from me.

    After this my mind just would not stop. Instead of just talking and/or dancing with other women and just forget and let go of the failed interactions, i kept thiking things as 'what a loser i am'.

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Gender:
    Posts
    1,260
    Thanks
    12
    Thanked 22 Times in 20 Posts
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Hey man

    Looks like you've got a lot more skills and talent than you're giving yourself credit for. Day Game is not an easy thing to do, the fact you can is a positive. OK, your reasons for it hint towards a lack of self-confidence/inner-game, but I still respect that you're going out there and doing something.
    Give yourself some credit. It is effective to be openly honest with/about yourself, but you should also rejoice in your successes. Having the motivation and drive to go and speak to women is something to feel good about.

    OK, your friends - i take it you're worried they'll mock you or laugh at a blow out?! Just remember while they're laughing, they're also getting less than nowhere, they're not learning nor improving themselves. It's easy to stand at the sides shouting how to do better - getting onto the pitch and playing is where the truth comes out. So don't take it to heart too much.
    OR, find some better wings to go out with - ones that will support you and keep you positive.

    Next, know and accept that you WILL burnout from time to time. Any guy that tells you he never gets rejected, listen to with caution. There are going to be situations where you open a set that are just not ripe. Mostly, this is not a reflection on you, so don't take it to heart. Again, objectively assess the situation.
    But the only failure is failure to act. I cannot give you advice on non-events. Opening and burning offers us a chance to understand why, and strategise on how to improve. So, try not to worry about it.
    Look at it this way, I'll laugh at your twice and long and twice as loud if you don't open the next girl you like than your friends will if you burn out.
    (that's not a great way to motivate you, i know... but try to realise it's not the end of the world... and usually makes for a great anecdote)

    Next, if you're out with a lot of male friends, and it's obvious that they're watching what you're doing... females can get turned off quickly. It appears that you're doing a bet/dare and they aren't interested. So, if you are with quite typical boyish guys... try to distance yourself a little before opening a set.
    Or, just enjoy the night with your mates, and postpone gaming til a better night.

    Anyway mate, don't worry about last night. You were drunk and in a club.... that's not a reflection on your gaming abilities.
    Just try to separate your nights. Going out and getting drunk with mates is great fun, but less great for success with women....
    Example of DHV: I show her my AngryBirds score
    Example of DLV: She shows me hers...

  5. #15
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Gender:
    Posts
    33
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    When i was younger i worried about my friends seeing me fail when trying to talk with women. I was always freaked out that they would think less of me or make fun of me if i got rejected. A man never wants to be seen as a failure with women by his peers, since success with women may be mans biggest evolutionary motivation. So in highschool i took zero risks and reaped zero rewards.

    Then i got to college, (the great time of of reinvention), and decided that i was going to approach every girl i was attracted to without hesitation. If is saw an attractive girl on campus or at a party i went in without thought...and you know what? an odd thing happened. my friends started asking me for advice on approaching. See it turns out they were just as nervous. They hated the idea of looking stupid in front of people just as much as i did. Plus they were just as worried about what i thought about them as i was about their opinions of me.

    My friends actually wanted to be around me more because i was willing to break the ice with attractive women, and they actually saw that as value on its own. As a result of that my confidence soared, and my pickups got better.

    My point is, don't make the mistake of thinking that your friends lack the same insecurities that you have. they have them, believe me. Its how people act despite those insecurities that will define how successful they are.

    Quote Originally Posted by LatexX View Post
    First of all, thanks for being interested in 'fixing' me.
    My guess is that apart from motivation which i definitely lack, the main problem is that i do not ACT when i see clear opportunities. I mean, most of the time i'm willing to talk to women but when i see a woman showing some kind of interest, i tend to panic.
    I usually sarge solo during the day. I can talk to women, get them interested, get digits, etc.

    I'm also really afraid of interacting with women when friends are around. I feel there's too much at stake. Like i'm risking too much to do it. I don't like to be 'observed', if she rejects me, then all my friends will see that and i will feel even worse.

    I guess my inner game needs work.

    Last nite we went out with friends. What a horrible night. First of all i drank too much. We went to a bar, we started drinking, I was feeling like doing approaches and talking to people. I was kinda anxious. I started talking to chics and they would reject me instantly. I would talk to many different groups. I thiought i did this just to impress my friends. I did not impress them much for the interactions would not last very long. I was being shutdown quickly. I started feeling frustrated. Then we went to a club. More alcohol. We danced and fooled around. Then i did such a lame move, i chose the ugliest and fatest girl in a group and started dancing with her. I don't exactly know why i did this. I guess i thought it was an easy thing to do. God help me. After a couple of minutes, one of her friends came and took her away from me.

    After this my mind just would not stop. Instead of just talking and/or dancing with other women and just forget and let go of the failed interactions, i kept thiking things as 'what a loser i am'.

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Gender:
    Age
    28
    Posts
    40
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    I had the same feeling of wanting to 'give up' a while ago but in my case, it was different because it wasn't the getting laid part, but the whole thing (i'm a girl, for reference).

    did you mean that you sometimes get tired because you perceive yourself as having to work too hard to get laid, or that you're getting tired of the whole thing, regardless of the payoff (sleeping around with hot chicks, etc.) and you just feel like all this is going nowhere and you'd like to stand still for a moment?

    I had the second feeling for many years...about 3 or 4. I never thought of wanting a boyfriend until i saw some couples who just 'made it'- and it was so difficult for me to find someone i felt comfortable with, and who felt comfortable with me. I just got tired of going out, picking up guys, dating, etc.,I just wanted someone I could relate to, not necessarily something super serious (i.e. marriage, kids, etc.) but just a damn boyfriend! It felt ok to have a social life as long as it fulfilled my needs, the problem appeared when everybody went home doing their own sh*t if you get my point...

    I still feel that way. My post is actually a question-within a question what the hell? everywhere i go i see coupled who just made it happen- they met up, had fun, then kept seeing each other again until they started making plans together and that was it. I'm not desperate to settle down, like i said, i don't care about marriage or anything in the family (i'm still young, 25) but...it's so frustrating when i can only find the dudes who want to get laid. and i never go for 'bad boys', that's the funny part. I like geeky guys, someone whom i can talk to about ideas, things, events, not just drinks and sex.

    perhaps the time it takes it's just normal, like other dudes said. If you're worried about your game, try changing venues if you're not ok with the type of girls you encounter (if that's the issue). I feel like i'm tired of dealing with strangers, i just want a man who can also be my friend...

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Gender:
    Location
    Estonia
    Age
    27
    Posts
    382
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Anouk, just remember that for every happy family there are hundreds and hundreds single men and women longing to belong to the same club. Maybe you too should try changing venues and activities to meet new men who suit your needs? .) Where do geeky men gather? And take it easy, no expectations, just having fun.

  8. #18
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Gender:
    Location
    Madrid
    Age
    38
    Posts
    83
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by Anouk View Post
    I had the same feeling of wanting to 'give up' a while ago but in my case, it was different because it wasn't the getting laid part, but the whole thing (i'm a girl, for reference).

    did you mean that you sometimes get tired because you perceive yourself as having to work too hard to get laid, or that you're getting tired of the whole thing, regardless of the payoff (sleeping around with hot chicks, etc.) and you just feel like all this is going nowhere and you'd like to stand still for a moment?

    I had the second feeling for many years...about 3 or 4. I never thought of wanting a boyfriend until i saw some couples who just 'made it'- and it was so difficult for me to find someone i felt comfortable with, and who felt comfortable with me. I just got tired of going out, picking up guys, dating, etc.,I just wanted someone I could relate to, not necessarily something super serious (i.e. marriage, kids, etc.) but just a damn boyfriend! It felt ok to have a social life as long as it fulfilled my needs, the problem appeared when everybody went home doing their own sh*t if you get my point...

    I still feel that way. My post is actually a question-within a question what the hell? everywhere i go i see coupled who just made it happen- they met up, had fun, then kept seeing each other again until they started making plans together and that was it. I'm not desperate to settle down, like i said, i don't care about marriage or anything in the family (i'm still young, 25) but...it's so frustrating when i can only find the dudes who want to get laid. and i never go for 'bad boys', that's the funny part. I like geeky guys, someone whom i can talk to about ideas, things, events, not just drinks and sex.

    perhaps the time it takes it's just normal, like other dudes said. If you're worried about your game, try changing venues if you're not ok with the type of girls you encounter (if that's the issue). I feel like i'm tired of dealing with strangers, i just want a man who can also be my friend...
    Hello Anouk, thanks for the reply. I'm tired of not 'getting any'. I feel i talk to thousands of chics and i'm not getting laid. I'm sure i'd feel a little bit like you. It's just not sex i'm after, i want to give and receive love.
    After all the time that passed between the original post and today, i've managed to detect a sticking point of mine: it's not that i don't enjoy female attention, it's what i do with female attention: i run away. Whenever a woman shows interest in me, i shut down. I enter panic mode and start behaving as if i'm not interested in her. I don't take charge, i get all shy. I literally go away.

    So there you have it, i'm a coward of sorts.

    Today i'm feeling the same way i was when i posted this thread. I feel like giving up on life. I don't wanna go to work, i don't want to talk to anybody, i just wish a lightning struck on my head so i can collapse forever and rest.

  9. #19
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Gender:
    Location
    Venice Beach
    Age
    30
    Posts
    275
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Try not to wallow its dangerous.....i feel that way when it comes to pua..but i refocus my energy to life in general.....when i broke up with my ltr of5 years i felt the way you do.....but i set new goals, not related to women btw, and for the last 2 years i have building the foundation to my life so that when a godod girl comes along i got dhv on my side...so fuck women go get your finances up and meet me in makati filipines and wel get laid every night

Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12

Similar Threads

  1. I want to grow my hair long
    By Gfunk in forum Culture and Lifestyle
    Replies: 25
    Last Post: 08-23-2010, 03:11 PM
  2. Grow the fuck up!
    By Precious in forum Relationships
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 06-01-2010, 01:21 AM
  3. Black girls? Is this an Italian thing? or a white thing?
    By Durk in forum General Discussion
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 08-04-2008, 11:25 PM
  4. Its Time to Be a Man and Grow Up
    By VEE in forum General Discussion
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 07-01-2007, 08:21 PM
  5. One day I'll Grow up and be Marvilous
    By Marvil in forum Introductions
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 01-09-2006, 10:41 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  • Forum Rules



Facebook  Twitter