Basically been hanging out with a girl I met a little over a month and a half ago. I've been seeing her a couple of times a week. I usually call her only twice during the week when I know she's not working to see if she wants to get together, and text her once or twice every few days. I usually initiate the hanging out during the week, and she usually texts me on Saturday to see if i wanna get together. Things started out great. She was staying over sometimes, we were hooking up, we talked about happy we were spending time with each other, crazy good physical chemistry...and so on...3 weeks into this thing, this girl said she liked me, how amazing I was, how could she lay beside me all day.
Bummer - What just happened here? Opinions >
I never did anything foolish like tell her I like her or ask her where this thing was going. Tried my best to lay back and let whatever happen...take it slow as possible.
I've treated this girl really good - taken her out of town a few times to places she's never been, introduced her to new things, new restaurants, listened a lot to her and had good conversations about actual real, deep topics.
Around two weeks ago, I feel I may have slipped up a bit.
Two weeks ago...After hanging out with her once on Tuesday, talking on the phone for a couple hours Thursday night, and not hearing anything from her Friday and Saturday, I finally decided to call her Sunday evening and didn't get a response. I waited a couple of hours and tried again - she answered, sounded really out of it and hungover, she had went to a wedding and stayed out all night at the reception. Since we usually see each other on Sunday, I asked if she wanted to get together that evening. She said she was tired, and was going to stay at home. I said "bummer, i was hoping since we hadn't seen each other all week we could get together". (fail) She stated she was sorry, she was really tired, I said it's all good - understandable...maybe we can see each other this week. She said,yeah, we will - we'll see each other Tuesday. Called her later that evening and talked for 20 minutes. After we got off the phone, I felt like I had pushed it a little. Sent her a text before i went to bed saying, "i didn't mean to bother you today with the phone calls - I know you're really out of it - I was on the road yesterday for business and I guess I missed your smile...have a great week, hope you feel better, take care"....she replied "Thanks! I'm sorry I'm so out of it - you didn't bother me - have a good night sleep well". Called her on Tuesday to see if she was coming, she came over when I got off work, watched a movie - we fooled around.
I had asked her to go to a concert with me out of town the upcoming Sunday, so I know I had that to look forward to. Didn't talk to her for 4 days until she called and asked what time we were leaving. She showed up Sunday morning, we spent the whole day together. Although I felt like something was off. She wasn't being as affectionate as usual. Her kisses back to me were different, ya know? I held her hand a couple of times, I kissed her a few times randomly throughout the day, nothing too heavy. Upon driving home she stated how much fun she had had and how she always has a great time with me. I was pretty buzzed, we laughed, kissed a few times at stoplights. The first week we started talking, she mentioned a DVD she really wanted. I ended up getting it for her and surprising her with it before we left out of town Sunday. On the way back I told her she should bring it over this week and watch it. She seemed content with the idea, we kissed before I got out of the car and she said "I'll see you later this week".
I texted her Tuesday, asked how her day was, and if she still wanted to bring the DVD over to watch. She replied, "maybe. I have to get all of the stuff on my to do list done. I'll try. I said that's cool, I'll let you get back to it, I'll call when I get out of work and see what you're up to. Called when done with work, she didn't mention coming over so I didn't bring it up, asked if she wanted to talk for a few minutes before I went to bed. We chatted, had a good conversation, said she had to go to get back to her friend that was staying with her.
I knew she was going to be off work on Thursday, so texted her Wednesday and again, asked if she wanted to come out with me my friend and his girlfriend on Thursday night.
I got: "I already have plans with my friend Thursday"
Me: "Oh okay, gotcha. I guess this isn't a good week"
Her: "Sorry. I only get 2 nights off during the week and I have been putting a lot of stuff/people off lately and I have some catching up to do."
I simply replied "it's all good no worries, I know you're busy and don't have a lot of free time. Do your thing and enjoy your time off. I hope you and your friend have a great time "
Never got a reply back from that text...haven't heard from her in 4 days.
Too much initiation of trying to hang out this week after spending all day together Sunday?
Maybe I'm expecting too much, but I feel like she would have sent me something back at least by now.
I feel like a jerk for thinking that she wants to hang out whenever she doesn't have to work.
She works 60 hours a week and has one of her friends staying with her for two weeks, so I know she's crazy busy. She's also extremely independent. I guess she needs some space and I need to back off. A few weeks ago things were AWESOME - she seemed really into me.
Have I already screwed this up, or can I still savor this by completely distancing myself and giving her space?
Am I an idiot for even worrying about this? I feel like something is off, and trying to backtrack my steps to see if I messed up.
I've done my best to keep things light and fun.
My main worry is that she felt things got heavy too quick, that I was clingy, or picked up on the fact that I really like her.
I was simply going along with the attraction (I thought) we both had going
Or then again I'm obsessing over nothing, or maybe she just wants to be hook-up buddies (completely OK with that)