Where do I go from here guys?

Discuss Where do I go from here guys? at the General Discussion within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; Where do I go from here guys? > So I met this girl about 5 ...

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  1. #1
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    Where do I go from here guys?

    > So I met this girl about 5 months ago, around December time. Met her at a club, kissed, number closed and texted back and forth. Text banter was great so took her on a date around January time. Date went quite well, but no action and we parted ways afterwards. After the date there wasn't a great deal of contact for a few weeks (none from my side as I wanted her to come to me).
    >
    > Anyways, fast forward this a few months and I see her out quite a bit. Any time I see her out we always end up in each others company and I go back to hers, but never get anywhere sexually apart from a few cuddles. She says that she has only had s*x with one other person (which is her ex bf of 4 1/4 years that she is now broke up with for about 9 months. I am ok with this, at this stage.
    >
    > My problem is that I am not sure if she likes me just as a mate, if she fancies me, if she fancies me but is game playing because she thinks im a player, or if she fancies me but has her guard up because she thinks that I am a player.
    >
    > So as I said we do get on really great, our text banter is off the scale fun, and generally do enjoy each others company. Most of the time we do spend together is drunkish, having met each other on a night out and then messing around after. However I do occassionly meet up with her to do things. For example, last Sunday we said we would go to the cinema together as friends, and we did. Went fine, I was a little tired though. One remark she did make when I was driving her home was that she thinks I have a little collection of regulars that I text and ring up when I am bored and she hinted that I thought of her as one of these. Basically she said the impresison she gets off me is that I am a bit of a player.
    >
    > The bottom line is she says that she just likes me as a friend, but I don't know whether to believe her or not. I usually text her a few times a week and tbh 4/5 times I would be the intiator of any text mesages. Sometimes, I am rude to her, sometimes I am nice to her, just depends on how I feel but generally the rudness is very blunt and comedic banter.
    >
    > I told her a couple of weeks ago that I had put her in the friend zone, and she laughed and said that she put me there first. More banter. However, about a week after that I texted her drunk saying that I was too good for her etc. and that she was lucky I even associated with her as I only hang out with models. This was obviously very rude of me and I apolgised the next day but we got into a bit of a text war where she said that she thought I was rude, and then she started being rude. Essentially she said " why do you even care, sure you don't even fancy me". I then responded "obviously I do".
    >
    > So she knows that I like her and we text back and forth and go on the occasional date but I am finding it difficult to take this up a notch. I do also send her very nice texts from time to time, for example, the other day I text her telling her that she was one of my favourite people and she said that it was one of the nicest things she had heard and she hoped I was being genuinely sincere as it would be "mean" if I wasn't being sincere.
    >
    > How do I romp this up and find out if she really likes me, or acutally just likes me as a friend. As I said, she has only had it one time with one other person and that is her ex bf so she is a very very nice girl. She is also a model, a medicince student and a volunteer. A great, unbeliveable catch.
    >
    > Do I keep pushing and persisting, or should I go cold turkey and Ganji her?
    >
    > The problem is, I am not sure if she is cautious that I am a player, in which case she would want me to be nice and prove myself as a nice perosn, or if she genuinely doesn't fancy me or doesn't value me (which I find hard to belive as I am v. good looking), in which case Ganji games would be the best answer.



  2. #2
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    Sorry buddy, but right now you are 100% in the friend zone, and she has actually told you this flat out multiple times. You just aren't listening because you don't want to hear it. BTW if you two hang out a lot, she knows and has seen the types of girls you attract...so telling her you hang out with models is worthless. You need to show her you get attention from that type, otherwise you are just blowing smoke.

    Side note, she does not think you are a player, that is just a sh*t test/deflection routine to avoid having to get into conversations where you talk about your needy feelings. Also despite what they say, girls like guys that attract a lot of attention from women. Women want things that other women want, this holds true for shoes, outfits, purses, and men.

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    Where in any of that post did I indicate that i don't attract models etc. she knows full well what I am capable off, has seen my ex gf which is a model and knows that I am vip wherever I go

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Ireland View Post
    Where in any of that post did I indicate that i don't attract models etc. she knows full well what I am capable off, has seen my ex gf which is a model and knows that I am vip wherever I go
    I never said you didn't, i just said its better to show her that you are surrounded by models then it is to tell her with an attitude

    "and that she was lucky I even associated with her as I only hang out with models."

    You sound like Cartman from southpark yelling for her to respect your Authority!

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    Lol- I was drunk. That's the only time I ever said that to her and I did cringe the next day! But she knows all about me from looking at my Facebook which is littered at comments for hit girls. I just seem to like her the best and she is the one proving hardest I get!lol

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Ireland View Post
    Lol- I was drunk. That's the only time I ever said that to her and I did cringe the next day! But she knows all about me from looking at my Facebook which is littered at comments for hit girls. I just seem to like her the best and she is the one proving hardest I get!lol
    haha, been there with texts before...you just go "what was i thinking?" and hope they read it as a joke.

    I think the last line in this post says it all, cat string theory works on men also, and the problem is in this situation the more you chase the more she is going to pull away. As impossible as it is, you need to focus your attention elsewhere for a bit.

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