Have I lost her?
I think I definitely need advice here in order not to screw it up completely.
I've known this girl for more than 4 years now since we went to high school together. One year ago, we finished school and almost completely lost sight of each other. I never really cared much about it since she was just a female friend, and I've been in the army for the whole year and haven't got a lot of time to keep in touch with my former classmates. Sometimes we ran into each other though because her bf is a remote friend of mine. I knew that she had become a flight attendant meanwhile and since I want to become a pilot after my national service we always had a connection.
At the beginning of january:
So I would have my officer's ball at the beginning of february, and I figured out that I didn't wanna take a random girl with me but a good friend who would actually appreciate it. After new year's eve I was having a couple of drinks with her and her bf when the idea of taking her with me to the ball crossed my mind since she mentioned that she'd love to go to an officer's ball . So I asked her to come with me in front of her bf and she immediately said yes (he wasn't that amused, but he said he was cool with it). I also noticed that their relationship wasn't as great as it had been once.
January till february:
A few days after we met I fell hopelessly in love with her and got into an emotional conflict whether he or she should get priority. Since I've always liked her and I know that she truly is different to most girls I know, and that her bf was quite pissed of anyway, I decided to go for her. We kept in touch via text since she's abroad kinda often. Sometimes she wouldn't reply to a text, but would say she is sorry a few days afterwards. I wanted to meet her but we never made it, so I played cool and kept writing neutral texts in order not to screw it up before the ball where I would make my move.
Officer's ball (last friday):
I had only slept two hours the night before and was really devastated. I met her at the hotel room, where she was getting ready. The dinner was quite boring and I noticed that she was loosing interest, so I took her to the bar (alone, almost everybody else was going to a club where we could get in for free but we agreed we would stay at the bar) where she opened up (body language). She asked me what was going on in my life and I told her some army stuff which was a huge DHV since I got a lot of responsabilty I actually shouldn't be given (but I'm gooood). I knew I had failed to kino her so I wanted to fix it when 3 friends were joining us with their girls. Those damn bastards didn't get that I desperately needed privacy with her so they stayed until everybody was going to bed. I couldn't make my move that night and I failed to qualify her since I was stuck with teasing her. We kinda reconnected though and I realised that she still is an amazing girl I absolutely want.
The next day we stayed in the city until the afternoon, going for a walk and a bit of shopping. Again I failed to make a move. I told her I wasn't sure yet what I would do in the evening because I would have several options. She said she didn't know either and proposed to get together with her bf (the three of us) for dinner or so. I thought I should show her that I have other stuff going on in my life too and said I already had plans. She also mentioned that her bf is too nice to her (because I didn't buy her some stuff she wanted ) and asked me to go to a club with him that night as she didn't want to go (right?!). Again, I said no. Then she asked me what kind of woman I like, I told her that I absolutely want a blonde (she's brunette). I told her that we probably wouldn't get along anyway and she had to laugh. Eventually we got home and went seperate ways. Later that night I sent her a text, saying I had fun with her and that I enjoyed it. She immediately replied with callback humor thanking me for taking her with me to the ball. She didn't go out that night and was already in bed (so she didn't meet her bf that night).
On Valentine's day I sent her a text, asking whether a rose had made it to Kenia (where she headed out to on sunday and gets back this monday) and wishing her a nice Valentine's day, but I haven't got a response (yet).
In my opinion, I played way too distanced being afraid that she could reject me. Therefore, I kept teasing her and not qualifying her at all. I'm really scared that I screwed up and I'm not sure about what to do, but I know for sure that only few girls would go to a ball with a guy whom they wouldn't want to sleep with.
On one hand, she might actually be disappointed that I didn't make a move. On the other hand, I might have fallen into friend zone. I don't know whether it's a good idea to continue playing hard to get since I haven't shown any interest except for asking her for a meet up (before the ball). She might think I friend zone'd her...
Writing her again and asking her for a meet up, being warmer and qualify her.
Waiting for her to text me or let it cool off further and try again in a few weeks (while being warmer, of course).
Please, guys, help me!