'I don't want to be lead"

[Growing Pains]

That's what she said to me the other day after starting a fight. In subsequent days she keeps referring to this idea, that I just want to lead her and I want her to live up to my expectations, that I want to impose rules on her.

I said it's not really rules on her, it's rules on myself for what I will and will not accept, and that is in relationships and friendships alike. if my friend treated me a certain way I would not remain his friend. Does that mean I am controlling him, or have boundaries for myself?

We've been together for about a year and a half. Just looking for some input.

[Vapor]

Need more details. If you are being needy and controlling, that's one thing. If she has a crack habit you want her to quit, that's something else.

Is it the same girl in this thread?
Married and Whipped...help turning it around...

Read the linked post from silversixone over and over. He has exactly the right advice.

[BigDuke6]

Every time she says "I don't want to be lead" immediately say "Zeppelin ?" You'll break her state and it'll diffuse things some.

[FemmeFatale]

Thats all well and nice, but you should include more info..perhaps you are being a tad controlling or coming off as needy.. tell us what caused her to say that to you from scratch.