Urgently help wanted ..

[Doffie]

Guys .. i need your help .. fell in love with guy .. he's been my bf for little over 1 year .. soon he asked me to marry him (i said yes) .. so i quit my job and moved to Asia (he's from Asia, i'm from the UK) .. He told his parents about me and they told him not to see me again. We couldn't be together so i traveled round a bit. We kept in touch and right now i'm staying with him, but things are not smoothly.

The big issue we're having now is that we might be having a 3-some .. he iniated a chat online (under my name) with a girl to have 3-some. i want/wanted 3-some, but don't feel 'safe' about our relationship. Last week he told me he didn't want to marry for next 3 years (not ready etc .. then why did i leave the UK ?! .. couldn't he think of that before ?) .. so i feel a just a mean to get a 3-some and don't feel loved/appreciated .. He feels he's not special to me .. (let's say culture differences)

Am reading to move out and say him bye .. he's hurt me before in the past .. (and i him .. people in love do crazy things and can be mean to each other) ..

So .. guys .. advice would be welcome ..

[TheRogue]

When you quit your job to be with a guy on his territory, you practically lose all power in the relationship. Your BF now has all the power, and he's clearly mis-using it.

Also, the fact that he wouldn't marry you because his parents objected says a lot about his character. He seems to be highly dependent on his family still, and has picked his relationship with them over his relationship with you. I am not sure why they dislike you, but if it's because of the cultural difference, the chances that they'll ever warm up to you are slim. Keep in mind that even if he does marry you, his family will be there trying to break him away the second your relationship gets rocky.

His postponing the marriage is a huge red flag as well. If I were you, I would leave this guy behind and pursue my own happiness. You've made enough sacrifices for him. If he can't step up and be the man he promised to be when he proposed to you, he's not worth having around any longer.

My 2 cents,

Rogue

[Yodatg]

^^^

What she said. I'd say this to guys AND girls - follow what makes YOU happy.

That guy is a total pr*ck in my opinion. As Rogue said, he's not stepping up and being man. Total pussy.

Get out while you still can and find someone in the UK...hey...I'm in the UK...Brits kick ass ;-)

[FemmeFatale]

Originally Posted by TheRogue

When you quit your job to be with a guy on his territory, you practically lose all power in the relationship. Your BF now has all the power, and he's clearly mis-using it.


Rogue

I agree.

Also, your man let you travel around for a bit alone because mommy dearest didnt like him seeing you? Find a man with balls,not someone who does everything that mommy and daddy say.

Leave him. Go back to the UK and find someone better. Tell him, he is not good enough for you and walk away

[Cedar]

Originally Posted by Doffie

So .. guys .. advice would be welcome ..

Have a threesome with him. Then end it.

It's a strong ending to something that was beautiful, but just ain't gonna happen long term. Not if his familiar isn't supportive.