Chicks divulging personal information

[elementz]

OK so I'm talking to a chick, having a good conversation and she starts to talk about something sensitive from her past, but then stops and says "I don't think I really know you well enough to tell you the details".

Now it's obvious here that comfort is an issue, upon rationalising she doesn't feel secure enough to reveal some deep personal shit. And I don't blame her, I've only been working with her for a week lol. If she did divulge real personal stuff after such a short time it might even be a little unnerving...

But the fact that there almost seemed like a part of her that wanted to, IOI?

Note to admin: Sorry if this is an obvious one that should be put in the noob forum, but I searched and there wasn't any relevant posts I could find. I just thought, it's on the subject of comfort and this surely must be something that comes up occasionally.

Thanks. Any feedback appreciated.

[Peter_Pan]

hmmm, yeah she seemed to want to which is an IOI but she didnt so you might not have built enough comfort, what you could have done is divulged something personal about you to her, even better if you think you know what her problem might be and yours is similar to hers, and then told her that you dont want her to repeat what you said but you told her because you trust her, she will be more likely to tell you then and this is an emotional investment for her so you will be far more likely to see her again

[elementz]

Ah, emotional investment, good thought. Yeah I kinda tried to relate but got the feeling it had been quite a big problem for her in the past so didn't say too much. My experiences were trivial by comparison so it might have came across as me trivialising hers, you know? I'm going to continue building comfort with her but try and keep things light for a bit. Sometimes if people divulge a bit too much they later regret it and then clam up, which is no good. Cheers for the advice dude