How do you keep motivated when you're content? - The Attraction Forums

PrinceNZ · #1 (**permalink**) 08-15-2008, 07:59 AM

Before I start, I would like to acknowledge that being "content" is going to vary from person to person, for some it will be that simply seeing a girl is sufficient to meet this level, for others its seeing 5 girls (possibly all at the same time). For me I seem to be content when I meet a girl who is hot and who I sex on a regular basis. I am at this level right now, and I have been in the past.

I have noticed the following trend a number of times, the x-axis is time and it begins when I am not seeing a girl.

As a short background let me tell you my story of the last couple of months. I seriously committed myself to getting to a high level of PUA mastery. I went out 3 times a week, really concentrated on my body language, applied all my knowledge, and damn, I got good. I had an opening rate of around 90% (including day time) and #C 100% of those that I attempted (I'm a picky guy). I was almost "seeing the matrix" -- and I have never been happier. I noticed profound changes in my work skills, social skills, mindset (optimistic), and overall levels of happiness. I was enjoying life and anything I wanted was mine.

Then I met HB8.5. She is EXACTLY the type of girl I got for. Petite, sexy, slim, great breasts, extremely presentable, and totally into me!

But after closing HB8.5 I stopped going out, and due to the lack of practise, my skills and sociability have fallen dramatically. And unless something changes soon I'm probably going to lose HB8.5 since the mindset that attracted her in the first place is now deteriorating!

I went out tonight, and the only reason I did so is because HB8.5 sounded flakey for my meet with her tomorrow. Thats my motivater.

I want to have motivation to go out and meet new people and girls ALL THE TIME. It makes me happy, and while I know that logically I do not know that emotionally, which is what will trigger my motivation.

I'm wondering how PUAs (like, actual PUAs) deal with their motivation. Once you've fucked an HB9 what reason is there to go and find another when you can just call her up? Is the variety a motivator? DO you find a flaw with the HB9 you already closed to go out to find another HB9 who is better? WHat happens when you meet an HB10, who the chances of surpassing as so low that going out would be a waste of time?

I would appreciate any thoughts anyone with experience can offer.

Thanks in advance,

jesseelite · #2 (**permalink**) 08-15-2008, 03:00 PM

Good question. A lot of it is hormone driven. I have cycles of extreme horniness, which is my primary motivator.

Phateless · #3 (**permalink**) 08-15-2008, 03:05 PM

Great thread! For me, it's not so much the going out and continuing to meet new girls as it is the self-maintenance. When I get a gf, I tend to fall off the face of the earth and not hang out with my friends enough, go to the gym often enough, or generally maintain myself in the way that I should. I think being happy with one girl seriously affects your drive to meet new women. My whole mission of meeting a lot of women was based on the idea that I hadn't met one cool enough to hold my attention.

Now I've had this gf for a while and I'm beginning to get bored. I'm not sure what to do next.

handle007 · #4 (**permalink**) 09-21-2008, 06:08 AM

PrinceNZ, find a friend you can trust and show all your secrets, go out with him, watch him grow, watching him get better will make you get better. perhaps work on work and other ambitions

PrinceNZ · #5 (**permalink**) 09-24-2008, 04:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by handle007

PrinceNZ, find a friend you can trust and show all your secrets, go out with him, watch him grow, watching him get better will make you get better. perhaps work on work and other ambitions

Thanks, this is good advice. While I haven't divulged my secrets to anyone, I have in fact been focussing on other areas of my life. I'm liking the change in focus, but have a little anxiety to whether my skills will be up to scratch when I get back in the PU ring!

dman · #6 (**permalink**) 11-13-2008, 04:20 AM

still go out and be sociable even when you are in a relationship, just because you are in a relationship doesn't mean you can't party on a friday night and talk to girls (just hold of on fucking them)

RedJoker · #7 (**permalink**) 11-13-2008, 02:45 PM

For me my pattern goes:

a) date a bunch of girls
b) find one I like more than the others. Stop seeing all but 1 of them
c) date that 1 exclusively for 2-3 months.
d) crave excitement/thrill of new sexual partners
e) start dating other girls again. Leave the original one in the mix, though... until things die off or blow up.

RedJoker · #8 (**permalink**) 11-13-2008, 02:47 PM

Op,

your situation is pretty common. Only way around it is more experience I think... and also if while seeing 1 girl you really like, force yourself to be flirty with other girls in your daily life. If you are relatively new, I would say dont stop going out to pickup girls, even if you are seeing one you like.

jiggatycoon · #9 (**permalink**) 11-18-2008, 06:15 PM

Wow I just 5 starred this thread. Maybe you've scared some people off by your graphs, but this is an exceedingly good way to communicate tendencies and trends that I've recently gone through myself, and I fully understand what you're talking about.

I hope there's an answer out there to overcome this phenomenon, because even after getting out of a LTR and exhibiting these same patterns, I could see myself doing it all over again.

FemmeFatale · #10 (**permalink**) 11-26-2008, 01:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PrinceNZ

Before I start, I would like to acknowledge that being "content" is going to vary from person to person, for some it will be that simply seeing a girl is sufficient to meet this level, for others its seeing 5 girls (possibly all at the same time). For me I seem to be content when I meet a girl who is hot and who I sex on a regular basis. I am at this level right now, and I have been in the past.

I have noticed the following trend a number of times, the x-axis is time and it begins when I am not seeing a girl.

As a short background let me tell you my story of the last couple of months. I seriously committed myself to getting to a high level of PUA mastery. I went out 3 times a week, really concentrated on my body language, applied all my knowledge, and damn, I got good. I had an opening rate of around 90% (including day time) and #C 100% of those that I attempted (I'm a picky guy). I was almost "seeing the matrix" -- and I have never been happier. I noticed profound changes in my work skills, social skills, mindset (optimistic), and overall levels of happiness. I was enjoying life and anything I wanted was mine.

Then I met HB8.5. She is EXACTLY the type of girl I got for. Petite, sexy, slim, great breasts, extremely presentable, and totally into me!

But after closing HB8.5 I stopped going out, and due to the lack of practise, my skills and sociability have fallen dramatically. And unless something changes soon I'm probably going to lose HB8.5 since the mindset that attracted her in the first place is now deteriorating!

I went out tonight, and the only reason I did so is because HB8.5 sounded flakey for my meet with her tomorrow. Thats my motivater.

I want to have motivation to go out and meet new people and girls ALL THE TIME. It makes me happy, and while I know that logically I do not know that emotionally, which is what will trigger my motivation.

I'm wondering how PUAs (like, actual PUAs) deal with their motivation. Once you've fucked an HB9 what reason is there to go and find another when you can just call her up? Is the variety a motivator? DO you find a flaw with the HB9 you already closed to go out to find another HB9 who is better? WHat happens when you meet an HB10, who the chances of surpassing as so low that going out would be a waste of time?

I would appreciate any thoughts anyone with experience can offer.

Thanks in advance,

It doesn't matter if you're not keen on meeting other women at this point in time... but you have to force yourself to go out because of you, not because shes sounding flaky. It doesnt mean you have to go out to a club and chat up random chicks.. you could go out elsewhere, with your friends.. or even on your own. Your motivator shouldnt be to just go out more and have options bleh bleh bleh.. your motivator should be to have a rich life.. people with a rich active life, with hobbies, etc.. these people have options and they dont even register it in their brain.