meaningless #closes - The Attraction Forums

zenith656 · #1 (**permalink**) 02-29-2008, 12:49 PM

hey guys

I get numbers but they dont answer, I've tried something different for each girl so far.
like call next day, call 2 days after, and tried texting but i just get their missed call recorder, or no text replies

I know its their number because i prank them when I get their number just so they have mine

Even the ones who offer me their number and say they will call me, but they dont

I've even played on this and said I know you wont call, and they adamantly say they will.

Tbh I'm getting a bit bitter with this because its all well getting numbers but every one doesnt answer or reply. And i'm beginning to think rating a pua by number of #closes is not a great way to rate them. Anyway any ideas/insights what the hell is going on much appreciated.

Also any advice on getting over first time phone call AA ? I really have to make myself do it and I write down what I want to say and I just think it sounds scripted but I can talk to friends or female friends on a phone no problem.

Also someone said put them on a monthly rota, good or bad idea?

CrasherAnon · #2 (**permalink**) 02-29-2008, 05:54 PM

A number close doesn't mean jack shit.

Read that again, a few times over. Great.

Now, that said, let me explain (for everyone that doesn't see where I'm going with this)

I met a girl on the bus the other day, I chatted with her for 2 minutes, and then my stop came up, so I got her number. (A number close) I texted her later that day, and never heard back. Then again a few days later, still nothing. I never heard back, ever.

Another scenario, I met a girl, spent a half an hour at school chatting with her, got past attraction, into some early comfort, was at the point that I could ask her anything, etc etc. Then I had class, so I got her number (number close). I texted her later that day, and we had some texts back and forth for about an hour that evening. I met up with her again in a day or so, and we ended up dating for a while.

Why? It's all about the method man. They're flaking because you are lacking sufficient comfort. Maybe even lacking sufficient attraction. Getting a girls number doesn't mean anything, it's really just A MEANS TO AN END. Think about it, why do you want her number? Because then you can keep in touch, get together again, and get to know her better. Getting her number is NOT anything to her, she gives it out all the time.

So, you need to work on your structure, make sure to get far enough along in the model, and then number close, typically, if you're thinking: "wow, that was fast" then you did it too fast, slow down, make sure you're where you think you are, and continue from there.

zenith656 · #3 (**permalink**) 03-01-2008, 01:45 AM

yes this is what i'm thinking, i'll give two examples:

Example 1. 2 set with wing, built a lot of playfulness and seduction, after 15 minutes I'm on the dance floor with HB grinding on me, and kissing, she notices friend by herself so she wants to get back to her I think I'll get the number and get back to my wing, my goal wasnt to sleep with a girl on the first night. Maybe it should have been.

The thing is I expect she was hit on later, probably the wrong thing to leave her. Maybe somethings about to click in my head but does a girl really not care about a guy calling who she was having a laugh and grinding/kissing with? It seems so meaningless, maybe it happens every time a girl goes out.

Example 2. Meet a 2 set in a bar, with 2 wings, lots of teasing negging just being fun, drinking games and bounce everyone back to mine for more drinking. More fun as a group/chatting/drinking etc they're being very sexual, lezing up etc but I'm not at the stage of my game to escalate and I was too tired, I'm more interested in in keeping them as friends/contacts. The most playful one said to take my number and I gave the impression I wasnt interested but she said she would call tomorrow and pay for breakfast, so I said ok and took her number. Maybe I should have showed more interest about going to breakfast. Anyway again this was a good night which lasted a few hours not justa few minutes. I tried calling later no pick up.

I've got a girl as a best friend so at the expense of looking like a wuss I chatted about this with her, and she mentioned a ton of reasons why she might not be able to pick up or text back, like busy or no credit etc, of course I'm thinking shes bullshitting me to be nice.

CrasherAnon · #4 (**permalink**) 03-01-2008, 03:51 AM

Quote:

built a lot of playfulness and seduction

You did WHAT now?

I'd suggest going and buying a copy of The Venusian Arts Handbook, I don't think you've read it, or at least read it well, because you're sloppy with terminology and I get the feeling you don't know the method very solidly.

zenith656 · #5 (**permalink**) 03-01-2008, 06:14 AM

lol rereading Mystery Method, I didnt mean seduction as in foreplay/lmr/sex

Ok i know whats missing, my C1 gets to a point of no-return from a friendly chat, so I've cut this and gone straight to C2 which gets further quicker but if a bridge happens here theres no C1/repport and no reason to talk to me other than if they want to get further than C2 with me. I would need to go back a stage first which I'm not given the chance if they don't pick up.

Does this sound right?

CrasherAnon · #6 (**permalink**) 03-01-2008, 11:44 AM

There ya go, now you're onto something.

Because of where you left off when you last saw her, you're just that guy she was dancing with in the club. And then when you call up the next day, her mindset is that you don't know her that well, and you're basing your call upon the fact that you want sex. Well, she doesn't want sex right now, so she's not gonna pick up the phone.

If you want to read up on how to eliminate this, check out Sinn's post on qualification.

Qualification

brandi · #7 (**permalink**) 03-05-2008, 02:21 PM

"Also any advice on getting over first time phone call AA ? I really have to make myself do it and I write down what I want to say and I just think it sounds scripted but I can talk to friends or female friends on a phone no problem."

I suggest you do something else meanwhile you call. Driving the car, defrosting the freezer (yes this is great), assembling furnitures, being in a social environment talking to others, etc... The more tricky (and cool) shit the better. It keeps you from focus internal (plus you dont seem to be needy).