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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 08-15-2008, 10:48 PM
Murrman Murrman is offline  - Male
 
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ask her what time she's having dinner, if she says 6:30, you say great, I'll pick you up at 9 for some drinks. (someplace where women drink free that night, or you bring a bottle of wine)

It may sound cheesy, but I've ducked dinner many times without the girl even realizing it.
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Old 08-15-2008, 11:25 PM
sdnightfly sdnightfly is offline  - Male
 
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If she has kids she's going to identify with you. If not, she might love kids and accept your situation. You're doing what you can to make sure your kids' have a good life.

Don't see it as "poor". Don't think like that. "Dressing nice" is just about coordinating your look and making sure things match up right.

Taking a girl out to a cheap place, just any place that doesn't involve spending money on food and drinks. The park, the beach, a couple of foldout chairs somewhere and a kite, a basket of some leftovers, and good conversation.

There's some disadvantage to not being able to go back to your place, so maybe get a babysitter (whoever you feel can watch the kids) and have the kids out of your place for the night.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Some Guy View Post
Advise me. What kind of frame is nessicary for a poor man to do well in this world?
I work hard for not very much money and I am a single father so that makes things doubly tough for me.
I dont fear the approach but once its time to take it to the date level my frame falls apart. I cant afford to dress nice (school is starting back and I have to spend money that I dont have on school clothes for the kids)
I guess what I'm asking is how do I reframe poverty?
I know its a stop gap measure, and I am working on solving the problem of being poor but in the mean time wtf do I do to convey high status while being authentic (I cant play 'starving artist' because I'm not)
whats are cheap place to take a girl? Can I suggest going dutch w/o looking like a loser? And how do I get back to her house insted of mine.
On that last note I usualy say that I have kids at home and I dont want them to meet a girl unless I know that they wont get attached to her only to have her dissapear (not that I am looking for a ltr but it's my excuse for not bringing them to my place).
This is a quickly composed post but plz read between the lines if need be and give any and all opinions!
Thanks guys.
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Old 11-13-2008, 03:43 AM
dman dman is offline  - Male
 
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I go to second hand stores, I dress awesomely for next to nothing
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  #14 (permalink)  
Old 11-13-2008, 06:36 AM
new2town new2town is offline  - Male
 
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Age: 30
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Ok, it's all about frame.. I'm back in school, getting my MBA, living off grants and loans and don't have two dimes to rub together... Your frame should be that the girls are lucky to be around you and even that their there to assist you (not necessarily monetarily) not the other way around.
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Old 11-13-2008, 06:37 AM
new2town new2town is offline  - Male
 
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the biggest date I ever go on is coffee
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  #16 (permalink)  
Old 11-13-2008, 08:37 AM
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TrueStory TrueStory is online now  - Male
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You want frame?


Quote:
Originally Posted by Some Guy View Post
Advise me. What kind of frame is nessicary for a poor man
You're NOT poor, you're broke. Poor is for life, broke is for time being
Quote:

to do well in this world?
You already doing well in this world. You have to see the good things
Quote:
I work hard for not very much money
work hard on increasing your income. College? night school? better job?
Quote:
and I am a single father so that makes things doubly tough for me.
You're also a man and you take care of another human being. That is a very strong DHV
Quote:
I dont fear the approach but once its time to take it to the date level my frame falls apart.
Your place. Her place. HOME cooked dinner. Or go walk in the park, roller blading, or just have a cup of coffee. NEVER pay for her, that's bad game.
Quote:
I cant afford to dress nice
you don't need to be an ARMANI man. Dress stylish. Thrift stores have some good clothes. Cheap.
Quote:
(school is starting back and I have to spend money that I dont have on school clothes for the kids)
you gotta do what you gotta do. You're man. And that's what man do. They solve issues and work thigns out
Quote:
I guess what I'm asking is how do I reframe poverty?
word "poverty" should NEVER escape your mouth. Think as temporarily broke. It is in your inner game.
Quote:
I know its a stop gap measure, and I am working on solving the problem of being poor
I was poor myself. I was poor college student, I took out my own loans, I supported myself. And I was ALWAYS poor. then I started finding a way to get richer. Don't run away from problems, but instead work towards a goal. Like other guys said.
Quote:
but in the mean time wtf do I do to convey high status while being authentic
sometimes you gotta put dating on hold and take care of present important issues.
Quote:
(I cant play 'starving artist' because I'm not)
Don't play excuse of anything. She doesn't need to know your financial situation. It's none of her business.
Quote:
whats are cheap place to take a girl?
you don't take girl [out]. She comes along with whatever you do.
Quote:
Can I suggest going dutch w/o looking like a loser?
Don't even go to restaraunt. If she wants you to pay for food screw that. All you're doing is buying her free dinner and that's where it's going to end. No sex.
Quote:
And how do I get back to her house insted of mine.
What's wrong with your place?
Quote:
On that last note I usualy say that I have kids at home and I dont want them to meet a girl unless I know that they wont get attached to her only to have her dissapear
I wouldn't look for excuses. Tell her that you have children. BTW do you have a baby sitter?
Quote:
(not that I am looking for a ltr but it's my excuse for not bringing them to my place).
You'll escalate towards sex at your place faster than at her place. That's just normal logistics. But either way, you can go hang out at her place.
Quote:
This is a quickly composed post but plz read between the lines if need be and give any and all opinions!
Thanks guys.
You probably should consider dating older woman 25+ that have steady jobs and do not look for sugar daddy. I think you'll do fine. You just have few troubles that you need to handle first.

And how difficult would it be for you to either finish degree or get a better job? This can significantly improve your self esteem and exposure to dating.
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  #17 (permalink)  
Old 11-15-2008, 03:27 PM
latnlvr latnlvr is offline  - Male
 
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Location: south florida
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Default Very interesting thread

See I am 40, divorced alsmost a year, and have 3 beautifull children. I have had more sex in the last year than I did in 15 years of marriage. I have to live with someone( just a roomate in thier house) so I can get my marital debt down. Women dont care if I f them on my twin bed.

Chicks dont care as long as you are confident.

Most will pay for dinners or drinks for you, without you asking, or trying to be in a poor mans frame. I pay sometimes too. I met only one golddigger and I dropped her quick. It is an attitude change. You can do it and reap rewards!
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