Be a Risk-Taker

[Tenmagnet]

As you guys probably know, we talk a lot here about three “Attraction Switches”, which are the core traits that women find attractive in men. The three switches are 1 – Preselected by women 2- Leader of men and 3 – Protector of loved ones. I’ve been thinking about this for a while, and I think we should consider adding a fourth attraction switch; successful risk taker.

Why successful risk taker? Think about it – what is the most unattractive adjective that a woman can pin on a man? It’s LOSER. Being a loser is the most unattractive thing that a guy can be. Dumb, player, weird, badly dressed, dorky – all these are bad enough, but loser if the king of the insults when coming from a woman.

In a game of chance, your chance of success depends simply on what game you’re playing, and your strategy. There are no world-champion blackjack players, because (aside from counting cards), there’s no strategy you can use to win. But in real life, there’s an extra factor – you. Some people, when they take a 1 in 10 risk, win every time. Some people, when they take a 50/50 risk, tend to fail a lot. The first group of people are winners, and the latter are losers. Which category of person you fall into says a lot about your character and ability to succeed in the world. You can also tell which kind of person someone is by the risks they take.

For example, there’s a common statistic out there that says 2/3 of all small businesses fail within the first two years. From that statistic, you might reasonably assume that starting a small business isn’t really a smart idea. You might read that statistic and think “I’m better off here in the office, working for the man”, but that’s loser thinking. That 2/3 statistic is only relevant if you’re just as smart, competent and hard-working as the average small business owner. If you’re brilliant, talented and you have a good small business idea, your chance of failure might very well be zero.

Likewise with sports. The chance of a highschool basketball player making the NBA is probably 1 in 1,000…. Unless your name is Michael Jordan, in which case it’s 100%. So when you say to youself “going for that goal is a big risk”, think to yourself – is it really a big risk? For you?

And this is why the willingness to take risks is attractive to women. People who are willing to take risks do so because they are *winners*, and people who are afraid to take risks do so because they are *losers*. By taking risks, you are demonstrating to a woman that you are a winner… (well, either that or really stupid, but once you show you’re not stupid, you look like a winner), and when you chicken out - you're a loser.

Let me give you guys some real-life examples of simple risk-taking and what it says about you.

- You won’t eat Indian food – You’re a wimp and will barf
- You think Mexico is too dangerous to ever visit – You’re a chump and people like to rob you.
- You would never play the stock market – You’re not smart enough to win.
- You’re cheap (even if you’re rich) – Deep down inside you fear losing your money.
- You perform jackass-like stunts – You’re confident enough in your physical and mental prowess to do things that would otherwise be considered stupid.
- You’re trying to be a rockstar – You’re confident enough in your musical abilities that you’re willing to risk it all.
- You drive too fast – You’re confident enough in your abilities that you’re willing to bank on it.
- You have a bad habit of being loud and abrasive in bad neighborhoods and seedy bars – you’re confident that if things went down, you could handle yourself.
- You have a healthy contempt for rules and punishments – You’re smart enough to not get busted, and tough enough to risk the consequences.

Even risks that might otherwise be considered “stupid” can often make you look cool. If I were to do a bunch of Jackass-style stunts, I would probably hurt myself pretty bad, and for me, they would be stupid. But if you’re tougher than the average guy, if you have the fortitude, then one of those stunts might be a perfectly acceptable risk. They only look dangerous to wimps.

So what do you do now that I’ve enlightened you with this information? First, you have to go out there and take risks, and live a risk-taking life. That might mean a few failures here or there, but if you keep at it, you’ll become a winner. Second, when you’re talking to women, you want to convey this information. Talk (in comfort) about how you did something that might seem foolish or rash, and how it worked out. Finally, just remember guys… it’s *successful* risk taker, not *stupid* risk taker. I don’t want you guys poking your eyes out and coming back to me!

[miaddict]

As a caveat to 10magnet's post, make sure you take calculated risks. I hope you are not advocating aPUAs to indulge in criminal activities for the thrill and the reward.

How cool would you look if you eat Indian food containing peanuts if you are allergic to the said nut?

It's probably better to talk about 'getting outside your comfort zone' rather than risking losing all the things you care about 'to impress some girl'.

Risk-taking is as much a psychological trait as it is value-based. Be conservative where it is required(to ensure your survival) and risk-loving in some circumstances. And best of all, live your life with passion and some caution. Nothing is going to convince me to go to Iraq right now(even the allure of beautiful belly arabic women with skin smooth like silk and a hypnotic midriff).

[adamm411]

I'm sure the intention of Tenmagnet's post is positive, so I shall temper my comments accordingly. On the one hand, it is laudable to pursue goals that you are passionate about, and thereby risk failure in the process.

But to suggest any and all manner of risk, specifically to score tail, to me, sounds irresponsible and even stupid.

I wish Tenmagnet had given a bit more thought to his post, more specifically in order to differentiate between:

1. stupid, immature behavior in general.
2. responsible behavior in the pursuit of goals which one is ACTUALLY passionate about
3. risk taking of any kind for the primary or sole purpose of scoring tail.

1 and 3 are stupid, needy, desperate, or even all three. 2 involves intelligent long term planning and pursuit of goals which lead to growth and community betterment. I think we all need to draw sharper distinction between positive activities such as investing money to build a business that employs people in your community vs. driving 100 in a 20 mph zone when a bunch of schoolchildren are crossing the street. Both involve risk. The former is evidence of intelligence, maturity and risk taking. The latter is ||||ing stupid, anti social and irresponsible. Not to mention criminal.

Tenmagnet is sketching/outlining a kernel of an important idea so I don't want to condemn this idea while it is still in draft form. But let's elaborate on it so we don't encourage people to do stupid shit to get laid. You don't need to break your neck to get laid. In fact, if you DO break your neck, you won't be able to get laid since your private parts won't work any more.

PS: As far as implying that someone is a pussy for being afraid to visit foreign countries, I just read an article from a pua who just returned from a south american country. He was robbed of $1500 dollars, his pua friend was pickpocketed, and his *other* pua friend was robbed at gunpoint. This is REALITY, not evidence of being a pussy, or a loser as Tenmagnet put it.

I am seeing more and more of these "mindless risk taking as alpha behavior" posts, and I see fewer and fewer posts about long term planning, intelligent assessment of risk, and self development. It's sad. I predict scores of "pua's" will be getting clocked in the jaw trying to stick their fingers up people's noses and getting their heads cracked open trying skateboarding tricks to try to develop dhv routines and stories for clubs and bars. People: WAKE UP!

Originally Posted by Tenmagnet

Let me give you guys some real-life examples of simple risk-taking and what it says about you.

- You won’t eat Indian food – You’re a wimp and will barf
- You think Mexico is too dangerous to ever visit – You’re a chump and people like to rob you.
- You would never play the stock market – You’re not smart enough to win.
- You’re cheap (even if you’re rich) – Deep down inside you fear losing your money.
- You perform jackass-like stunts – You’re confident enough in your physical and mental prowess to do things that would otherwise be considered stupid.
- You’re trying to be a rockstar – You’re confident enough in your musical abilities that you’re willing to risk it all.
- You drive too fast – You’re confident enough in your abilities that you’re willing to bank on it.
- You have a bad habit of being loud and abrasive in bad neighborhoods and seedy bars – you’re confident that if things went down, you could handle yourself.
- You have a healthy contempt for rules and punishments – You’re smart enough to not get busted, and tough enough to risk the consequences.

Even risks that might otherwise be considered “stupid” can often make you look cool. If I were to do a bunch of Jackass-style stunts, I would probably hurt myself pretty bad, and for me, they would be stupid. But if you’re tougher than the average guy, if you have the fortitude, then one of those stunts might be a perfectly acceptable risk. They only look dangerous to wimps.

So what do you do now that I’ve enlightened you with this information? First, you have to go out there and take risks, and live a risk-taking life. That might mean a few failures here or there, but if you keep at it, you’ll become a winner. Second, when you’re talking to women, you want to convey this information. Talk (in comfort) about how you did something that might seem foolish or rash, and how it worked out. Finally, just remember guys… it’s *successful* risk taker, not *stupid* risk taker. I don’t want you guys poking your eyes out and coming back to me!

[adamm411]

One more question for Tenmagnet: is any of this field tested? How do you demonstrate your risk-taking qualities to a woman as you are talking to her in a club or bar? I am at a loss to see how these examples could help you get laid, such as eating Indian food or driving too fast, visiting Mexico, etc.

Do you tell the woman or her group that you've done these things? Do you reveal your driving record, produce a receipt of stock market losses, or order a spicy meal as you're talking? Show pictures of yourself wearing a sombrero? Talk "trash" to her to show her you're willing to face rejection?

I'm starting to wonder upon second reading, if the OP posted this as a test of our gullibility.

Originally Posted by Tenmagnet

As you guys probably know, we talk a lot here about three “Attraction Switches”
...the willingness to take risks is attractive to women.

Let me give you guys some real-life examples of simple risk-taking and what it says about you.

- You won’t eat Indian food – You’re a wimp and will barf
- You think Mexico is too dangerous to ever visit – You’re a chump and people like to rob you.
- You would never play the stock market – You’re not smart enough to win.
- You’re cheap (even if you’re rich) – Deep down inside you fear losing your money.
- You perform jackass-like stunts – You’re confident enough in your physical and mental prowess to do things that would otherwise be considered stupid.
- You’re trying to be a rockstar – You’re confident enough in your musical abilities that you’re willing to risk it all.
- You drive too fast – You’re confident enough in your abilities that you’re willing to bank on it.
- You have a bad habit of being loud and abrasive in bad neighborhoods and seedy bars – you’re confident that if things went down, you could handle yourself.
- You have a healthy contempt for rules and punishments – You’re smart enough to not get busted, and tough enough to risk the consequences.

Even risks that might otherwise be considered “stupid” can often make you look cool.

[Tenmagnet]

But to suggest any and all manner of risk, specifically to score tail, to me, sounds irresponsible and even stupid.

I wish Tenmagnet had given a bit more thought to his post, more specifically in order to differentiate between:

1. stupid, immature behavior in general.
2. responsible behavior in the pursuit of goals which one is ACTUALLY passionate about
3. risk taking of any kind for the primary or sole purpose of scoring tail.

1 and 3 are stupid, needy, desperate, or even all three. 2 involves intelligent long term planning and pursuit of goals which lead to growth and community betterment. I think we all need to draw sharper distinction between positive activities such as investing money to build a business that employs people in your community vs. driving 100 in a 20 mph zone when a bunch of schoolchildren are crossing the street. Both involve risk. The former is evidence of intelligence, maturity and risk taking. The latter is ||||ing stupid, anti social and irresponsible. Not to mention criminal.

See, you're wrong here. I'm not talking about endangering schoolchildren, but I am talking about taking risks for their own sake, for the sake of fun and for the sheer thrill of it.

The fact is, guys who engage in stupid, immature, behavior (and who are under 30 years old), get laid. Why? Because they're fun, and because they're demonstrating that they have what it takes to be a winner.

[Tenmagnet]

Originally Posted by adamm411

One more question for Tenmagnet: is any of this field tested? How do you demonstrate your risk-taking qualities to a woman as you are talking to her in a club or bar? I am at a loss to see how these examples could help you get laid, such as eating Indian food or driving too fast, visiting Mexico, etc.

Do you tell the woman or her group that you've done these things? Do you reveal your driving record, produce a receipt of stock market losses, or order a spicy meal as you're talking? Show pictures of yourself wearing a sombrero? Talk "trash" to her to show her you're willing to face rejection?

I'm starting to wonder upon second reading, if the OP posted this as a test of our gullibility.

First of all, I don't like your attitude.

It's most important that you don't engage in any loserly, un-risk taking behaviors, engaging in risk-taking behavior during a date is kind of hard.

Most importantly, you never want to be the party pooper, lame duck who says "we shouldn't do that".

But that said, as an example, last weekend I was drinking in front of Buckingham palace and singing O' Canada with a bunch of friends, including a beautiful British girl who I had brought out. The police eventually came and kicked us off. And yes, I got laid.

Another great thing I've done is I've broken into abandoned buildings on dates, that's a lot of fun. And yes, I got laid.

And I tell endless stories about things I've done, from being teargassed while filming a documentary, to starting my own business and being told I was going to fail. I even talk about gambling (I always claim I won). Obviously, talking about things is the primary way I demonstrate that I am a winner.

[adamm411]

But they also get shot and killed, get arrested and wind up doing 25 to life spending the rest of their lives with...other men.

Also, there's an assumption that I have do all sorts of outlandish shit to impress women, in order to demonstrate that I have value, in her eyes. Why not take the opposite tack? That she has to prove that SHE is interesting enough for me to be with HER. Let her prove herself and qualify herself to me.

Last, do you find from your own experience that people who engage in high risk behavior have any less approach anxiety, or meet more women, or are more successful with women? This is an interesting theory, but you don't present any evidence for it. Evidence from your own personal experience in particular, would speak highly in terms of the validity of theory.

A lot of guys are on this forum are now ready to risk breaking their neck in order to score with chicks, lol.

Originally Posted by Tenmagnet

See, you're wrong here. I'm not talking about endangering schoolchildren, but I am talking about taking risks for their own sake, for the sake of fun and for the sheer thrill of it.

The fact is, guys who engage in stupid, immature, behavior (and who are under 30 years old), get laid. Why? Because they're fun, and because they're demonstrating that they have what it takes to be a winner.

[adamm411]

Bro, this is a board to share ideas and help each other out. If you are going to post ideas, be prepared for others to ask questions and ask for evidence. The moderators state ALL THE TIME not to post ideas without having them field tested first. To ask for this type of evidence is completely legitimate. To say someone has an "attitude" for asking for personal experience behind the post doesn't make sense to me.

What I do appreciate is the information on your personal life experience. This is strong support for the idea. Anyway, I like your attitude, in terms of helping us out and clarifying your initial post. As far as whether you like my "attitude" I have no opinion on that and it's completely irrelevant. Good post and I *especially* appreciate your clarification. I'm off to my work out, which is not risk-taking activity per se, but it'll sure get my adrenaline pumped! Cheers!

Originally Posted by Tenmagnet

First of all, I don't like your attitude.

It's most important that you don't engage in any loserly, un-risk taking behaviors, engaging in risk-taking behavior during a date is kind of hard.

Most importantly, you never want to be the party pooper, lame duck who says "we shouldn't do that".

But that said, as an example, last weekend I was drinking in front of Buckingham palace and singing O' Canada with a bunch of friends, including a beautiful British girl who I had brought out. The police eventually came and kicked us off. And yes, I got laid.

Another great thing I've done is I've broken into abandoned buildings on dates, that's a lot of fun. And yes, I got laid.

And I tell endless stories about things I've done, from being teargassed while filming a documentary, to starting my own business and being told I was going to fail. I even talk about gambling (I always claim I won). Obviously, talking about things is the primary way I demonstrate that I am a winner.

[Tenmagnet]

Originally Posted by adamm411

Bro, this is a board to share ideas and help each other out. If you are going to post ideas, be prepared for others to ask questions and ask for evidence. The moderators state ALL THE TIME not to post ideas without having them field tested first. To ask for this type of evidence is completely legitimate. To say someone has an "attitude" for asking for personal experience behind the post doesn't make sense to me.

What I do appreciate is the information on your personal life experience. This is strong support for the idea. Anyway, I like your attitude, in terms of helping us out and clarifying your initial post. As far as whether you like my "attitude" I have no opinion on that and it's completely irrelevant. Good post and I *especially* appreciate your clarification. I'm off to my work out, which is not risk-taking activity per se, but it'll sure get my adrenaline pumped! Cheers!

No problem dude... it's just that I've been out gaming every weekend for the past year, and three weekends a month for the three years before that. Of COURSE it's field tested man!

You can be certain, unequivocably, that every single thing I say is massively field tested. It should go without saying.

Anyway, I often come across testy over the net. Don't take it personally.

[adamm411]

No worries, man. I think in my own case, I am risk taking in some ways, and very risk averse in other ways. I've occasionally done things on occasion, in an unplanned and spontaneous fashion (and certainly not to impress girls), where I've thought back later and said: 'whoa, that was NOT such a good idea (while secretly enjoying the adrenaline rush).' Yet this doesn't necessarily translate into automatic, consistent success with women in particular.

Also, I meet people sometimes who are risk takers yet don't necessarily have a lot of success with women, and sometimes they don't have ANY success with women. I've met people and have some friends who work in very high risk, physically dangerous occupations. They work with all sorts of hazardous materials, put their lives on the line every day, and yet they go home...dateless. Rosey palm and so on. They took risks earlier in their lives, getting their heads cracked playing sports for example. And enjoyed it. But again, it doesn't necesarily translate into success with women.

To me, I think it's really a matter of TRANSFERRING our willingness to take risks in other fields, and APPLYING it in the area of meeting women. We have to tell ourselves: 'look, I take a risk, EVERY DAY just to make a living, or having fun in my hobbies, and the risk of dating rejection is MUCH less dangerous.'

I don't see the link as necessarily being all that automatic (risk taking and success with women); instead, we have to ACTIVATE it. And that comes with a lot of time in the field. To me, that's the biggest determinant of success with women: spending time actively meeting women, whether we are inherently risk seeking or not.

Anyway, fascinating thread, and I hope people aside from Tenmagnet and I have a chance to contribute, so I'll step aside and listen to others, rather than talk so much, lol.