Misogyny and the community

[Sinn]

I'm sorry to break the string of tactics and techniques that we seem to love immersing ourselves in, more than anyone I value the knowledge and information on these boards.
But I thought today would be a good time to sit down and have a little chat.
It has come to my attention, that something is terribly wrong with this community.
Misogyny and sexism, antagonistic feelings toward other men and misplaced feelings of compeititon.
The community is supposed to be a place where we can come together and help each other get what we want out of our relationship lives.
I would love to change the filter so that the words "whore" "pimp" "bitch" etc.. were filtered out. But that wouldn't be enough.
Instead I challenge everyone in the community to change the way you THINK.
Don't blame women for the way they act, they can't help it anymore than a spider can help making webs and eating flies.
Women are not bitches or whores, or any of the other words I see being used on these boards.
Misogyny does not get you the women you desire. It only drives them away.
There is a reason we don't tell women about these boards, at first glance the community could be seen as a sleazy place where we focus on tricking and deceiving.
But I don't think it is.
This is a place that promotes personal growth and allows us to become our best selves.
Everyone here loves women, you wouldn't be here if you didn't.
If you hated women would you spend all your time trying to learn how to attract them?
Why would you want to attract something you hated?
Isn't it about time that we started acting like we love women and appreciate them?
I have been guilty of all the things I have written about and worse.
But I looked at myself and realized that the problem wasn't with women, it was within me.
I had to stop blaming women for their behavior and start focusing on what I was doing wrong.
So I challenge everyone on this board or who might read this years from now. Right now make the choice to stop blaming women and take personal responsibilty for the reactions you are getting.
It's not the easy way out, but it is one of the steps on the path to mastery.
The same thinking applies to other guys as well.
There is no such thing as an AMOG or a chode.
The only reason guys get upset is when YOU (I include myself in this collective you) are doing something wrong.
Going into sets with guys in it planning to steal their girls is wrong.
And guys can smell the agenda radiating off of you.
That doesn't mean that we shouldn't do it, but I would love for the whole community to empathize with other guys.
And realize that in every interaction with a guy or girl we can leave the other person better than we met them.
Empathy is a sorely missing skill from the community.
It's time to see that we cause the reactions we are getting, and to take responsibility for them, rather than just whining about it.
Lastly, leave every woman better than you found her.
I know why we don't do this.
I came into the community a heart broken mess and when i got the oppurtunity to return the favor I did, multiple times.
And I was wrong..
I've been heart broken and I've broken hearts and while we do need to end problematic relationships, let's make sure that we do so with compassion.
There is no glory to be found from hurting a girl's feelings and even more so, there are nothing but benefits to ending relationships in a way where there are no hurt feelings.
I realize that some women do make bad choices during relationships, but even when you have been wronged, there is power in keeping the moral high ground.
Something that I have been guilty of giving up too easily.
I write this not as a criticism, but rather to hopefully guide some of you who are lost in a sea of pain and don't know where to turn.
It took me over 2 years in the community to figure out that it's not cool to treat people badly and that you can bring yourself up without pulling other people down.
So if you want to continue to be filled with anger toward women and other people in general than I suggest you stop reading this and embrace celibacy. But if you can look at yourself and take responsibilty for your actions and the results that they are bringing you, then together we can make the community something to be proud of.
S

[trainrunner]

Well put. The other day I was thinking about having top notch game and the effects of witnessing many women cheat on their spouses/boyrfriends. At first this made me bitter towards women, and being aware of the whole blue pill/red pill concept I was almost leaning towards niativity. However when i thought about it women are just as bad or good as men. Being a skilled PUA and mastering seduction and using it on women in relationships is the same as an HB 10 straddleing a married man and removing her top. Some things are just hard to resist and men and women are equall in most spheres but just diff.

[pr0zac]

Touche Sinn. One of the first things I noticed when I showed up here is there does seem to be a large divide between those who are here because of positive feelings and those who are here because of negative ones. A lot of newbies like myself seem to join for the wrong reasons. In particular the "I've got a girlfriend but want to sleep with other women on the down low" posts get to me.
While I understand where those negative beliefs are coming from, having experienced them myself, I have also realized that recognizing their fallacy and letting them go is the first step to self improvement. Being a genuinely good person will always be a good, attractive thing. I really wish more people would figure this out. I hope your post helps.

[Legion5]

What Sinn says is 85% true...
The only thing I would add that women are less women and more people over all.
I would also add that it still does't give any indevidual or group the green light to treat you poorly.
-
Also scince when is the famous Sinn known for being a softy? I think an attitude like that is love of your own success.
Would Mystery be up for making you his official permanent wing? Would be interesting. I know you two have hung out around girl together.

[Sovereign]

Rule #1 on my post from several months ago: Rules for aspiring PUA's.....
Spot on Sinn.

[Starman]

One of the things I really appreciate about the community is the realization, and empowerment, that I could seek and get what I wanted from relationships with women. I've got my first FB who I maintained the frame with about seeing other women, and she considers me the best relationship she's ever had (for better or worse there). Another out-of-town GF/FB knows the score too and competes for me and I'm not lying about a thing. I'm circumspect, but never lie. And I hooked up with another HB for a makeout session last week and told her straight up I saw other women and she told me about seeing other men. No problem. No lies. No anger or hate. Still seeking a LTR, but not impatient or pressured to do so, thanks to the community. Hooked up with a couple of strippers, good experiences, and had them insist on giving me phone numbers and keeping in touch. They're people too, before being HBs or anything else. This can all be done in a positive, confident way that makes your own life, and the lives of others, better.
The frame PUA gives you can be awesome. I was in Europe over the summer and coming out of the bathroom through a crowded dance floor apparently touched a girl in a way a guy thought was inappropriate. I don't think it was, and didn't pay that much attention -- just being a guy comfortable touching people. When he made a big deal of it, I just shrugged and moved on. Not a big deal either way. He was really the one broadcasting insecurity.
And your FB is a person, too. Mine wants more, but was empowered while she was traveling to make out with a guy she found attractive, and tell me about it after. That was all cool. This girl had bad experiences with guys in the past, and is now super positive about things. Teasing the hell out of me, too, but that's what you want isn't it? We both know we won't end up together longterm, but the next guy should thank me for what I teach her.
It's easy to love them and leave them, or hide things, or be shitty in a hundred other ways. But no one has to be an asshole, and you can have pretty much the same stuff as a good guy without being the nice guy pussy.

[Rusty]

I dont think guys on the forum hate women. I think some repressed noobs are resentful towards women because of the power they have over their lives. And then their are some that have slept with women and they no longer see them as women, they start to see them as numbers.
You can see from my posts that i dont hate women, i've had a tough patch with women lately and i've been lied to, and yet i still dont hate women.
But i think we have all been resentful towards women (as we have with men) and this might come across in some posts.
I also agree with Sinn, he mentions empathy towards afc's with girls. I believe that nobody shouls go for a girl with a boyfriend, unless; boyfriens an asshole, she doesnt like him or you are head over heals in love with her (which apparently pua's dont get because they can only develop feelings for a girl after sex).
And he says leave every girl better than you found them. This should not just be for women it should also be the same for men.
Back to the main point, perhaps we should call guys out if they are being disrespectfull towards women. You know, ask why they think hb6 is a bitch.

[sting]

look - we all had the same upbringing as far as this stuff is concerned. disney cartoons, love conquers all movies with the man chasing, "and they lived happily ever after". boys are snail, pails, old goats tails and girls are sugar sweet, spice and nice.
the thing is, when you start exploring real life, you find that a lot of this isn't a bullseye. and it hurts. and you get angry. and you blame it on the girls because they are not what you were taught to believe they were.
this is normal, its a phase almost everyone who follows this path will have to go through.
at some point, we realize its not the girls fault, its not our fault, its just that we were given some bad info on the topic at a time when we weren't able to know that.
its like the way people went ballistic when someone suggested that the earth went around the sun, not he other way around or that the world was round and not flat.
people don't like to have their beliefs shattered - even when they have nothing to do with day to day life. and the realization that girls aren't like Snow White can, has and will continue to hit guys hard - and give them a temporary misogynistic edge.

[Perfect Dark]

It's all about making the shift from innocence to the real world. When you're innocent you like to think girls are too, you usually find out the hard way. When this happens you blame the girl, then it happens again... the more it happens the more you realise that every girl is the same! So you come here to try and get the advantage. You realise that there are things you can do to get the upper hand in every situation, you understand why those girls were bitches to you... because you weren't doing the things she needed. Then when you get MaDsKillz you'll probably turn out to be just as bad as those girls you hated. It takes a lot to take a step back and get out of the us vs. them mentality, and if done too early then you've lost your frame and your focus.
Anyway, I find the words bitch and pimp funny, I often use them to the girls I know and never fail to get a positive response. The "You're not special, you're just the bitch I'm fucking right now" is probably the greatest line I've ever said to a girl... did she take offence? Hell no, she probably loved it.
I don't see any problem with this community.

[streako]

Negativity is perhaps the one biggest flaw holding back any aspiring PUA. This can manifest itself in various ways, from fear of approaching, to being insulting to a girl if she rejects ones advances.
I believe that there is such thing as the AMOG. I have friends who show AMOG tendancies and it seems to be a way of putting people down to improve (in their eyes) their own social standing. The proper AMOG, who is with a group who a PUA initiates contact with, perhaps has every right to be aggressive if some other guy tries to muscle in on his women. However, I have also seen much negativity amongst so-called friends who "AMOG" their PUA friend mercilessly, trying to belittle his methods, put him down and generally give him a hard time. As if the GAME wasnt hard enough for an aspiring PUA to learn, he can find it twice as hard when other factors conspire to work against him.
And so the negativity cycle continues. Sinn is right, we must try to be much more positive in all other areas of our lives, and we must start with ourselves.