Discuss She let me touch her breast, pussy, but she wouldn't kiss at the Field Reports within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; She let me touch her breast, pussy, but she wouldn't kiss
Right now i'm a ...
She let me touch her breast, pussy, but she wouldn't kiss
Right now i'm a bit puzzled - i was curious what you think was wrong.
I meet a friends at a club last night - we have fun on the terrace watching fireworks. We sit at the bar - right by us a 3-set. I open them (cashmere sweater) - it goes well. Best friends test - they like it. I do the ring routine for 2 of them - they like it. Then I throw the 'quit your job. Double the salary' pebble. They keep asking me where i am from - I finally tell them after making them guess. The best looking girl (HB7.5) asks me my name - I answer Superman. They ask me what I do - i make them guess. It's fun. After some time, the 2 girls leave and my targets moves next to me (she was the fartherst away) - it's like they planned for her to remain alone with me! I tell stories with DHV spikes - like the 'beauty is common' routine and i mention one of my ex is a Russian model in a story (which is true). I start rapport - we have family values in common - she seems a mature girl. Plus I cold read her and it seems we were both geeks until highschool. I neg her - i tell her that i'm starting to like her ... that she's either the coolest person i've recently met or the strangest - i don't know yet. She laughs and says : strangest.
She mentions she is very passionate in a relationship - i tell her to give me an example. She doesn't but she says if someone hurts her - she hurts him back. So i tell her the 'priest & nun kiss' routine -and she laughs - doesn't object. She says that's the farther she would go. I make intense eye contact and say: but you would do it. And she says yes and smiles . At that point i was blocked - i didn't know how to transition to kissing. The problem is i think i didn't do kino almost at all. So then I do the trust test - but she fails it. Some more fluff talk - then i do a TD routine where i hug her -she kind of resists. I do the tension tests - she kind of likes the massage. Then after a while I her a good song she doesn;t want to dance, but i take her hand and she goes with me. We dance - i spin her a lot - she laughs - we have fun. She asks me what i do - i say i pleasure women. She says 'I bet you're really good then'. IOI !! I say i get that a lot ... but actually i don't do it for a living ... although i like to think i am a pro at everything i do and since it's an economic crisis - i know what i will do if i get fired - we laugh.
Then I want to do the cube but i tell her that i don't think she's ready. So her 2 girl-friends come back and i tell her i want to show her smth outside. I stretch my hand back to her - and she takes it. Then outside i have a hesitation. Then i tell her the spells opener - she says it's psychological.
THen I do the ESP - I don't guess any of the numbers! F*CK! DLV.
THen her friends come outside. I tell a story - i see they have drinks - i tell her it's not fair that their friends have drinks and they don't - so we go inside - and we sit at the bar - ready to order. And i realise i have to pull the trigger. But i messed up a bit Style's phase shift routine - i started with the lions, then the smell (she kind of was unconfortable when i smelled her). - then i bite the elbow crease. THEN i tell her to bite my neck. She says "no. That it' s too intimate."
HERE IS THE TRICKY PART: So we were sitting at the bar - close to the club entrance and I tell her : but what if a from a cube of ice, a drop falls on your lips, and it goes down to your neck (and i show her with my finger) and then down to your breast - she doesn't stop me ... i insist a bit on the nipple - then lower - i tell and my finger goes lower - then i reach her pubic area - then between her legs - while i am telling her this (SHE DOES NOT OBJECT!!!). I ask her 'How is that?' She says : that's arousing i guess (or smth like that - i don't remember exactly). I say : NOW that is INTIMATE! Now bite my neck - i said to her very decisively. She said NO.
Then I tried the 'beauty is common. Special is what you have' kiss routine. I tried to kiss her - she pulled away. Then i started talking about how it's important to take oportunities bla bla. Ask her to play the 5 questions game: she says: i know what you're gonna bet - you want me to kiss you - and i say - omg you still think about that kiss. Is it that how much you want it? I ask her to think about it - she thinks about it and then says : No ( She really hesitated) So I caveman on her - but she still pulls away. she says: "I'M NOT KISSING YOU!" . I ask her why? She mentions she is very stubborn. I say i know she is attacted to me. I try to tell her the 100% perfect love story and say i will rejoin my friends after this story. Then her friends come in the middle of the story and say they are leaving - she says to wait cause she is leaving too. I continue my story. at the end I try one last time. I get a refusal again. So I ask her why? She says she has several reasons. I tell her to tell me 1 good reason and I'll go - to be honest because we won't see each other again anyway. She says she is seeing someone. I tell her i think that's bullshit. That I don't believe her and that i was honest with her - but she says something ( I don't hear what - and she gets up from the chair - getting ready to pay her tab ). I ask her what did you say- i didn't hear? She said nevermind. So I get up and tell her - Ok - pleasure meeting you and go.
A) HOW COME SHE LETS ME TOUCH HER BREAST AND PUSSY AND DOESN'T LET ME KISS HER?
B) AND WHY DID SHE STAY ALL NIGHT WITH ME?
C) WHAT COULD I HAVE DONE DIFFERENTLY?
I have some explanations :
1.i didn't pull the trigger early enough and, at the end, she had crossed hands body language when i was telling her the final stories (also she was looking like : "yeah ... right ... i know you are trying to woo me")
2. too litle kino at the beginning
3. when i went with her outside the first time i showed DLV ( hesitated, then the ESP that didn't work).
But I want to hear what you guys think. I really want to learn.
There's a few things, but I'll bring up the one about kissing, because that was the issue you had problems with and the one she fought you on.
Some girls view kissing as being too intimate, and you were persisting a little too much on it. When she's going "that's too intimate" about biting, not kissing the back of your neck, that was a sign that everything else was going to be off the table.
I guarantee she's the dominant one in the relationship, because she's good at setting her boundaries and being stubborn. She gets her way. Odds are her bf's home and bored going out with her, and all these things you're doing is going to get him laid. Her friends aren't going to say anything to him if they don't care one way or the other about him. She could've gone home with you and they would've just said she stayed with them.
Odds are she does have a bf, and if you weren't jamming your fingers right into her cooch, she just went home thinking she didn't do anything wrong, her and her friends got some drinks out of the deal, and made her bf a very happy dude. If you were fingering her and she was letting you, then you probably could've closed her had you not pushed the kissing issue. Maybe.
Everything else is good, so it's just some calibrating, tweaking and not pushing hard to k-close girls you meet right off the bat. And you'll find other girls who will k-close immediately. You just happened to find the one with a bf and sees k-closing as something she's given him exclusive rights to...ties into the "what is and isn't cheating" list.
Awesome insight sdnightfly,
Refinement, why were you so intent on kissing her?
Originally Posted by sdnightfly
at least you got some titty action
"Women are never disarmed by compliments. Men always are. That is the difference between the sexes." Oscar Wilde
Originally Posted by CMPitts
This reminds me of long ago when I would go to nightclubs, get drunk, grind on a drunk girl, and finger her on the dance floor. I would then ask for her number and she wouldn't give it to me. I think you made your intentions of sex too obvious. The more aggressive you were with the kissing issue, the more obvious it became. You and her both know that once you start kissing, your hand is going to start wandering and soon you'll be pressuring her to take her clothes off. From my experience, escalating sexual contact early and then going back to conversation/routines make things a little awkward. By fingering her, you crossed a sexual boundary where there's no turning back. You need progress further at that point to maintain her arousal. If you stop, even for a few seconds she will lose that arousal. Kissing means going backwards in her sexual progression. Keep in mind that you are at a bar, not exactly the best setting to put her in a state of seductive bliss.
What sdnighfly said makes sense if she does actually have a bf. Kissing may bring up intimate thoughts of her bf which could make her uncomfortable or guilty.
Maybe she thinks u have a dirty mouth...Joking sorry
Nah Kissing, is quite intimate, I think the fact that you pushed for it did hinder abit...
Maybe you could have ran a scaled down freeze out on her ?
I don't know the situation is extremely strange
Or probably her breath was kicking.
Nice one. Refinement.
I wasn't fingering her ... i was touching her over her blouse and blue-jeans. But still, normally they don't let you do that in public before kissing. Or at least it never happened to me before. Definitely I should calibrate and not be as pushy with kissing.
Originally Posted by sdnightfly
About cheating - i actually did the 'girl who kisses other guys in clubs opener' and she answered "depends on the girl what she considers cheating - some just sitting alone with another guy, others kissing, and so on.
Thanks for your answer.
@7seven7: I knew that if i don't kiss her soon i will get into LJBF zone. That's what my mind was telling me.
@Mindstate: I could have freezed out on her ... are you thinking right after she refused to kiss me first time?
@Malevolent: Actually I was a bit nervous about feeling my lips "harsh"... i I think i bit them a few times, just before trying - now I realize she probab ly noticed that and made her uncomfortable.
I'm a bit surprised that more people don't know that kiss closing a girl you just met in the venue often times pushes you farther away from the lay.
Next time you want to get hot and heavy with a girl you just met at a club or bar or wherever, ask yourself this:
"Do I want one night of heavy petting, or countless nights of sex?" - Mystery
ANYONE can makeout with someone in a bar, but it takes a Pick-Up Artist to methodically bring that girl back home for sex.
I was just thinking the same thing, that you put too much emphasis on the kiss...
You could have played it aloof and didnt worry about it, but after that first kiss gambit had you went in to kiss her, maybe wouldve panned out later for you in-bed.
I am one of those guys who makes out in bars... lo0l so I agree with 7 and imma stop for a while
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