o this blog felt like the proper place for this entry. Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. Anyway it is going here so deal with it.
Addiction to Success
So recently I was offered a job that I really wanted to get. Which makes me happy because it is like the perfect job for me. Mainly because I will only have to leave home to get food and workout. Anyway, I have been thinking about my attitude from today and yesterday. Yesterday was my work from home day... so you know that basically means it is my free day off from my current job. Once I had received news that I was going to be offered this new job. I felt really good about myself. You know lots of confidence and all that stuff that comes when you are successful. Old fires were relight. I guess that is why I am here because I was thinking about starting up my old goals specified here. Either way I was feeling really good. Kind of like the time I went out and actually spoke to females.
Now I look at today. I am being forced to get a decision. There are other good jobs out there. This one by any means comes with its ups... however, it is not without its downs. I also do not like having power in this regard. Because now I can kind of say Well I have a job I want so why do I need you... I mean that works great for getting women. Hell I want that power when dealing with women. However, when dealing with a job... things change. Anyway, so I noticed though while my thoughts were on what to do about this job situation. I felt really good you know I felt like things were ok, and maybe I could go out and give this whole thing another try.
Well it took only a few hours at my current job to kill that motivation and desire. I mean yeah I am happy that I am getting a new job. However, at the same time I am depressed because I have to continue to be here. I really hate my current job. So that is a nice motivation killer. I think it would be the same way with females. Hell if you read my other blogs I had a hard enough time dealing with rejection from other companies. So if I go out and try to improve and then come home to my depressing reality... well I guess I am kind of screwed right? At the end of the day I am still the same loser right?
Gah why couldn't this have happened on a Friday... I could have actually maybe found the motivation to go out... oh well.. just an interesting observation on how fragile my confidence is.