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Discuss Becoming A Burning Soul, By Taking a Different Path - Journal at the Field Reports within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; @Steyn: Well I am not sure my journal could be too motivating recently. I mean ...
  1. #41
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    @Steyn: Well I am not sure my journal could be too motivating recently. I mean all I have done is... well nothing. Like I said I can put forth the effort play through a game all weekend, and time myself, but I cannot go out and talk to people... maybe I should just give up.

    Anyway to answer your question, yes that is binary. You have to know how to read binary in order to know my ratings. :P Most computers have calculators that can convert binary to decimal form. I plan on using the same number of bits every time. That should give you an idea of what that number means. Just another way I waste the time not going out.



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    Ah i just finished reading it completely, i take my words back lol. But you are being harsh on yourself man, i have had a troubled childhood as well and i used to blame my parents but now i realize it is all my fault for being socially inept.

    So i think i kind of know what you're going through, i used to had same excuses, its all the mind's ways to avoid the anxiety you are going to face if you take this path.

    Work on your inner game, the material that worked for me was ekhart tole power of now, an inner game product by hyponitca - don't recall the name now but it was a seminar dvd and reading posts on the forums in classic writings/stickies related to inner game, motivational writings by steve pavlina(at his blog).

    Good luck and continue the journal but with writings about approaches.
    Girls are like phones. They love to be held, talked too but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Steyn View Post
    Ah i just finished reading it completely, i take my words back lol. But you are being harsh on yourself man, i have had a troubled childhood as well and i used to blame my parents but now i realize it is all my fault for being socially inept.

    So i think i kind of know what you're going through, i used to had same excuses, its all the mind's ways to avoid the anxiety you are going to face if you take this path.

    Work on your inner game, the material that worked for me was ekhart tole power of now, an inner game product by hyponitca - don't recall the name now but it was a seminar dvd and reading posts on the forums in classic writings/stickies related to inner game, motivational writings by steve pavlina(at his blog).

    Good luck and continue the journal but with writings about approaches.
    Glad I could help you take back your words. They are much more than I deserve. Anyway, I am willing to take a good chunk of the blame for my social struggles. However, I am not taking all of it. My mom played a pretty big role in socially isolating me when I was a kid.

    I do not think I ever had any inner game to begin with. Whatever my writings my say. Chances are they were all lies. Lying to myself, and worst of all to the community. I honestly think I am just broken. I do not want someone to have to drag me along either.

    I will do my best to refrain from posting anymore of my babbling on here. So that means that it will be a very long time before I post again... if I post again. What with my usual suicidal self seeping out more and more these days. I guess it is best to give up sometimes. I clearly do not have the drive to complete this quest. I probably never did. If I did I would have at least read Magic Bullets by now.

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    Done For Now

    So I figured I needed to have an official quit entry. That is just how I am. Anyway, if you look around you will see I have made a few modification. So to save a little time. I am pretty convinced that there is no cosmic or super natural event, that would land me female. Yes my inner game is in shambles. Suffice it to say that if a female was given the choice between suicide and repopulating the planet. She would choose the suicide. No matter how slow and painful. Yeah, I guess you could say my inner game is in shambles.... you know dust. Nothing is left of it. So no reason for me to continue.

    So like I said I am going to give up on this for the time being. Maybe in my time in figuring out the best way to blend in to the background and disappear, I might change. However, for now there is no reason for me to even try. I can cite many reasons as to why I cannot do this. Several of the most recent news letters really struck a few notes with me. Needless to say that I know I cannot improve with my current rate. Sadly all my other hobbies are more important to me. So I cannot dedicate the time needed to actually go out and get better with women. It is easier to watch anime, play video games, and hate women for not wanting me.

    Anyway I will do my best to not babble. So anyone looking for a wing, I am not that guy. Maybe later I can be a DD but not a wing. So anyway, yeah I am done. I would ask that this account be put on some kind of leave of absence. However, it is a great source for me to continue to fuel my depression and suicidal tendencies. What with me being a failure. That way when my kitty goes, which won't be long probably 5 years at most. I will be ready to pack up my stuff and go as well.

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    The best thought I can offer is;

    EVERYTHING in life is a choice.

    Might take some deep thinking to truly garner the immensity of that statement but I stand by it.

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    @DecadentSin: Yes, that is one philosophy you can live by. However, if I had the choice on whether or not to be born. I would not be here. I just have a flawed gene pool. This is just nature, those that are inferior get culled. Such is life, if I was not inferior. I would not be having these thoughts. That is the logic I choose to use.

    Odd I was not expecting a response. Most of these ramblings of mine likely go unread.

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    You choose to let these things hold you back. You choose to let them affect you like this.

    Its not an overly compassionate view but it works

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    so why are you keep posting here ? You want the pity the and attention, you want it cause you cant get is somewhere else. Pickup cant be done when you lack of enthusiasm and a positive attitude towards live.
    So what will you do? Continuing leading a live which doesn't make you happy? Maybe pickup is a way to far step for you right now. But self improvement itself can't never the wrong choice can it ?
    Dude try to socialize, find friends, seek therapy etc.. You seem to have nothing to loose, so try these things. This is the wrong forum for all this though
    Really I wish you all the best FrozenSoul. However I will now block you hope you find your way .. peace and love brother

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    @feudel: I post here because I enjoy the change of pace this forum offers. You guys all hold a very different view than most major forums out there. So it is a refreshing change.

    I actually have plenty left to lose. You can only lose nothing more when you are dead. I am currently socially isolated. Going out and changing and trying to be social and failing will further isolate me. Wherever I go I will hold the brand as that weird loser. No matter how I improve. Such is life, there is always room to fall even more.

    @DecadentSin: I can agree with you. In my case I am aware of these things. Therefore it is my choice to let them affect me like this. However, when one suffers a handicap in something. He or she can never truly have an authentic experience. Such is my case. Any woman who would be willing to give me a chance would never authentically want me. I would always be better than nothing, but there is always something better out there.

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    Its deeper than that. You don't have to choose how it affects you if you choose not to have it happen.

    EVERYTHING is a choice. Think about it a bit more.

    People without legs run 100m races faster than I could. Stop making excuses for yourself

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