Discuss 5 dates with a Stripper then Fail at the Dates and Dating within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; 5 dates with a Stripper then Fail
Met online after a few emails we decide ...
5 dates with a Stripper then Fail
Met online after a few emails we decide to meet up, I don't know anything about her at this point.
Date 1: Met for coffee, she said she was nervous, talked a lot, told a lot of crazy stories. I noticed despite her ‘girl next door’ look she had a large wrist tattoo under her sleeve. Went and saw an exhibition nearby.
Date 2: Arranged to go to the zoo, picked her up. Started raining, shared an umbrella, arm around her waist, slowly building kino throughout the day. Started raining again, shared umbrella, tried to kiss her. She moved us to a pergola; we start down, out of the rain and started kissing. Then we sat, arm in arm, waiting for the rain to end. Dropped her home, made out in the car.
Date 3: Picked her up, walked around an old cemetery, went and got food, took her back to my place had a drink on my bed, she seemed like she wanted to tell me something, she said how people often judge her. Before she had a chance I moved us to the living room and we watched a sexy French film. Started making out, we stripped, I fingered her and she gave me possibly the best BJ of my life. I suggested she sleep over.
Woke up next morning she confessed that the reason she can afford to pay off her house is because she strips. I acted unperturbed even though in my mind I was thinking “holy fuck”. Then, probably because I acted indifferently, she told me that she has done solo & girl-on-girl porn and worked as a dominatrix. Drove her home. Called my friend. Blew his mind.
Date 4: 2 days later, we went to see an exhibition, wasn’t open. Went and picked up burgers and ate them at her place, on her bed watching cartoons. Later we walked to the supermarket and got some fruit, cheese and ice cream and again ate on her bed. Watched more cartoons and started making out. She told me the trick to making her come and she came from being fingered in like 30sec! Then (this is the fucked thing) I lost my erection. I don’t know the reason maybe feeling the pressure. But I acted like it was no big deal and made out with her, spooned her, went to bed. Woke up, had breakfast, constant touching and making out. I left around 10.
Date 5: Then university finished, she starts working 10 days straight, stripping, doesn’t have much time but we meet up for Japanese. She lets me know in advance that she has to start at 8 in the morning at her office job so she can’t sleep over. Walking arm in arm, drive her home, make out in the car she says “if I didn’t have to work tomorrow I would be dragging you upstairs”.
3 or 4 days pass with typical daily text banter. Then I send a text asking her if she feels like doing something low-key after we both finish work Saturday night. No response. Sunday I call her, no answer. Monday she sends me a text…
“Hey sorry I’ve been MIA, I’ve been pulling double shifts & spent all yesterday in a coma… ughhh. I need to give dating a rest while I learn to manage my work/life balance. I’m feeling really guilty about my inability to commit to even a simple drink right now ☹”
I reply “fuck looks like I’m going to be listening to the Smiths for a while (carried on from a previous joke). Sorry if I was putting pressure on you to meet up. Can I call you or are you at work?”
She replies “Oh no, you were not putting pressure on me at all.. your expectations are completely normal. I’m just unable to meet them. I’m struggling to maintain existing friendships, let alone develop new ones. I’m really sorry, I feel like a complete bitch. With highlighter pens (reference to previous banter)”
Any suggestions about what went wrong? It seems so unexpected.
Went wrong for what? Stripper is alot of time does not have her life together. Most people refer them as BiPolar hence our model of Polarity model. A lot of them have crazy life style that is not normal 7-5 working people. And they do get into trouble like that
Listen. It's a online thing that means she really attract to u genuinenly
Yeah well from I can gather she is pretty much got her shit together. She has a morgage, studies full time and just started working part time in an office. But she still stripping 10 days straight so Im sure there are some residual side effects from that. Still I don't know where to go from here. I could re engague her with a text for some crazy fun date she won't want to miss?
Difficult one because you are dealing with something you cannot relate to; not many guys would understand what it is like being a stripper for 10 days whilst juggling friends, uni and an office job.
I think you are going to have to wait for her to return, but I would keep yourself in her reality.
I wouldn't ask her out: she seems forward enough. I'd keep in contact, your usual banter always with an undertone of caring. Show her you think about her without it being boring and needy.
Don't have any experience with strippers but she told you very honestly what her problem is and why she can't commit. There is only one thing you can do and that is letting her decide when and how you can meet. Just don't be an AFC and beg to meet up or keep texting, just let her know you are into her but are willing to see her on her terms!
Birthday: I'm not sure if she'll respond to banter at this point, I tend to think she needs some kind of enticing suggestion to get her excited again.
To date I have been very Gentlemenly, caring & respectful as you suggested, never making reference to her stripping unless she brings it up.
HugeGrant: I think that 'too busy' is a fake reason. As a stripper she decides the number of hours she wants to work. She's working a lot now because its the holidays. So she can start later or miss a day if she had a good reason.
wwejonathan: What's the Polarity Model? I did a search couldn't find anything. I think she may have Histrionic Personality Disorder. She says things to impress, is sexually confident & exhibitionist, sensitive to criticism & seeks approval. If that is the case, on the plus side, it means she is also easily influenced
If I follow that model I would say I didn't validate her ego enough. Even though I made it very clear that I liked her my 'cool indifference' to her crazy stories and inability to fuck her on date 4 may have made her feel insecure.
Did you have intercourse with her? You said you went limp, she is definitely turned off by that.
Remember strippers are very sexual, and want sex a lot.
You have to be very aggressive and caveman her with a 24 hour sex session. Otherwise she will think you are a weak wimpy man that she sees at the strip club.
Strippers have a quick hook on guys, because they are sick of losers who can't satisfy them. They have big egos and high expectations of sexual encounters. She might be into a lot of freaky sex stuff.
You blew it. If you call her, just get real sexual and tell her about plans about ravishing her body and keeping her up all night. Get her wet with a lot of sexual text messages and e-mails. She's given up on you, you have to be very sexually agrressive to win her back.
Polarity Model is our standard Model in Love System for dealing with Stripper. It's a improved Triad Model specifically for turn off stripper program and increase comfort than general method of club girl
Originally Posted by Andy Warhol
Take some viagra and go to her house!!!
Originally Posted by Andy Warhol
She doesn't want to see you because she thinks your cock doesn't work and that you can't even sexually satisfy her.
The last date was a big hint for one last quickie. She gave you one last chance to get it up. She probably thinks you are gay for not wanting to have sex with her.
You've found a gem - a reasonably sane, financially successful stripper whom you didn't meet at a strip club. She doesn't see you as a customer. That's a big step forward.
You've already had sex with her. She's not looking for a low-key date. Go for adventure. You probably could have fucked her in the cemetery. Explore an abandoned building with her. Take her off-roading in a Jeep. You don't have to be gentle; a working stripper is a jock. She can probably do more pull-ups than you can. Fuck her brains out and take her hard.
Recognize that she may turn out to be a total nutcase. Many strippers are. So be prepared to break it off.
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