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10-19-2007, 12:31 PM #1
You’re about to cross into Abyss of Neediness If…….
You’re about to cross into Abyss of Neediness If…….
….. You’re wondering for more than 10 minutes if you should call her or not
This was triggered by a post I read earlier. If you sit there, all day, wondering if you should call her; DO NOT call her. You call should be spontaneous, when you got bored from doing your daily tasks and you want someone new to talk to. Don’t even bother making day2 plans with her if it’s your first call. Just call her, bullshit for several minutes and tell her you have to get back to doing something (exciting).
If you started hesitating whether to call her or not…. You’re going to fuck it up. Feel edgy about calling? Get your mind off of it, and go to the mall; sarge someone else. Come back. Call her.
……..You’re giving her too much benefit of a doubt, too much slack.
Again, I hear guys talk about it; giving her excuses and why she did this or that. It doesn’t matter. It is your reality. Set up your threshold limit on what is tolerable by you and what is not. I, personally, have three strikes. (or just a BIG ONE). And because she is a 10 or a 9 don’t give her extra slack. If you wouldn’t take shit from a fatty, you shouldn’t take shit from a 10. EVERYONE, INCLUDING ME, falls in this trap. I do this shit all the time, except I catch myself giving extra privileges to hotter girls and I stop. THIS IS BAD! Do not do it.
If you’re sitting at home thinking about her action, look at it from a logical point of view: what she did is acceptable by you or not? If not, let her know that you don’t tolerate crap. This falls more into ‘relationship’ portion rather than pre-day2. If bitch stood you up on a date, tell her that it’s rude, and NEVER call her again. Because, we, men, have A LOT OF THINGS ON OUR PLATE and DO NOT HAVE TIME to waste. Stop thinking about her, giving her excuses in your mind, justifying her actions, but be reasonable about it. People do have emergencies;
…….You get overly jealous (exclusive or not exclusive relationship)
Hot girls have guy friends: lots of them. Hot girls have orbiters. These guys want to fuck them but can’t. Get used to it. In exclusive relationship there are things that acceptable and not acceptable, define these things between you two. Set rules and stick to them. (ok, correction: make her stick to them)
Just remember, she is probably going to keep her options open. Most likely she will LIKE SOMEONE ELSE while being with you, and there is a possibility she might cheat on you.
Guess what you should be doing? EXACTLY THE SAME THING: Keep your options open. Have other women in your life (even as friends). Have women in your life that are dying to fuck you (but can’t). Go out! Don’t stay at home with her all the time. Meet other women. You don’t have to sleep with them but always have your GAME ON. And if you happened to be in situation where you can cheat on your girl………. Well, that’s your moral stand point; I am not giving you advice on this
……..You wonder why she didn’t call you, (yet)
Why do you care? She is busy. You’re busy. (Or you should be). Get a life. I used to do this all the time. I would get depressed if some girl I was gaming didn’t call me. Then I learned that the only reason I am depressed is because I let myself be. DO NOT CALL HER. Just go out, hang out with your buddies and STOP CHECKING YOUR CELL PHONE every five minutes. You’re not going to miss a call from her. And if you do, even better; it shows her that you’re too busy and don’t have time to be worrying about her. Man up. She’ll call.
……….You’ve spend over 20 hours with her and still haven’t fucked her, yet kissed her.
I don’t want to hear this bullshit: “Well she is not like that; she likes to take it slow” BULLSHIT! This whole taking slow bullshit is her excuse for lack of attraction for you. If Johnny Depp offered her some dick, I am sure she wouldn’t even think about ‘taking it slow’. So don’t be that guy who gets lead on, only to end up in LJBF Zone. I can understand that some girls have issues with sex. Here is word of advice for you: you don’t want these girls. Do not try to play ‘good Samaritan’ and try to help her with her issues. Don’t try to ‘save her’. You’re not a shrink. You’re not her girlfriend. If she is too fucked up or prude to have sex within 20 hours of meeting guy, you’re on for a ride (you don’t want to take). Very few girls are like that though. Somewhere you just failed in attraction (sometimes comfort). Admit it! Stop letting your ego get in a way. You’re acting like a coward. FUCK HER ALREADY! If not, MOVE ON!
……….You call/text her, over and over, but she doesn’t return your calls/sms’
DESTINATION CREEPINESS! Welcome aboard! Stop with this shit. Just stop.
You call her, she doesn’t call back. Ok. You call her in few days; she doesn’t call back, leave a voice mail, and delete her number. Let me repeat that again. DELETE HER NUMBER. You gave her two calls over SEVERAL DAYS and on your last call you left her VM…… and it’s time to delete her number, because, you ARE NOT going to call her back again. Not going to text her, not going to call her and hang up or whatever creepy thing you could possibly do.
Naturally, if she calls you back, (IF), you’re going to say “Who is this?” …Don’t ask me why, just do it.
Most likely, she won’t (call you back) MOVE ON.
…………..You take her out on day2 and you would not leave her alone (after)
This is my personal rule. Day 2s are there to re-enforce your game; show her that you’re congruent with whom you were first time she met you, and day2 is there for you to plant several seeds in her head. Your day2 game must be tighter than your game when you first opened her. Going into day2 she should be thinking “Well, this guy is cute/hot/interesting, I want to get to know him better” …………leaving day2 she should be thinking “OMIFUCKINGGOD! This guy… wow… like I can’t stop thinking about him… he is just… amazing…maybe he is the one…I haven’t felt like this in a while!!!” (and she really should be leaving WITH YOU thinking THAT… and you should get minimal LMR)
BLOW HER FUCKING MIND! Then don’t call for few days. Let her wonder. Most guys fuck up entire chemistry by calling her THE SAME FUCKING DAY with “Oh hey, had a good time tonight.. I hope you got home ok. Thanks for hanging out with me…” <<<<< WTF IS THIS SHIT? DO NOT DO THAT! If you feel like you ought to, send her ONE SIMPLE text message “good night “ that’s it.
…………………….you stop seeing other girls because of her
Unless you both agreed to stop seeing other people and decided to start exclusive relationship, you SHOULD NEVER EVER stop seeing other women no matter how good looking she is or how wonderful her personality is.
If you don’t see other women except for her, start meeting more women. Seeing one girl will give you enough confidence boost to start seeing more. But you shouldn’t get stuck on JUST ONE GIRL. (whether you’re fucking her or not)
REALITY CHECK: She IS seeing other guys. She is sleeping with other guys. Sometimes, you might kiss her and you might not even know if she just given a blow job to one of her fuck-buddies. And there is a good chance she might still be fucking around on the side after you start seeing each other exclusively (not always though)
……………………………you read all this and nothing clicked, sounded familiar or made a slight shift in your inner game.
Ladies and Gentlemen, I was guilty of EVERY SINGLE issue listed above. Some were pre-game days some where during the game days. Most happened while I was in relationship! I would safely say that almost every PUA falls into on or the other trap of ‘neediness’. The good PUA will catch himself before it’s too late. Emotions are hard to control and there is nothing embarrassing if you’ve done on or few or all of these things. Just learn from your ‘mistakes’.
I learned how to deal with these urges and it boosted my game tremendously. I suggest you reconsider how you think about your targets. Someone, who shall remain nameless, once said: “She might be a dime, but you are a fucking hundred dollar bill!”
06-01-2008, 06:29 PM #2
You’re about to cross into Abyss of Neediness If…….
....You latch onto the next girl who you 'game' successfully.
You've been out and talking to girls for what seams like ages and not getting any action. Suddenly, one night you know it's all on. So you don't want to split from her side in case she gets away. Bar getting a drink. Your with her. Outside smoking. Your with her. Your both having fun and getting along BUT your smothering her with attention. Afraid she'll disappear and once again you'll go home alone.
- please read the stickeys to find out why this was deleted
03-13-2010, 11:01 PM #3
I can understand that some girls have issues with sex. Here is word of advice for you: you don’t want these girls. Do not try to play ‘good Samaritan’ and try to help her with her issues. Don’t try to ‘save her’. You’re not a shrink.
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I met a girl from a dating site who opened up to me (I'm the first person she's told) that she was sexually abused when she was younger. That's why she doesn't trust guys and hasn't had a boyfriend. I spent a month online talking to her about her issues and helping her. Playing "nice guy" but probably too much. I pushed her into having a phone convo with me.
She looks like a model - a perfect 10. I'm just average in looks, and never had a girlfriend, also had problems with depression myself. She knew all this and it probably makes me seem weak, but I tried to man up in recent convos.
But at the end of the day, I spent too much time on this one girl just because I thought she was different. Its just too much of a challenge to deal with girls like this. You never know if you're going to get anywhere. As for me, I was happy to hold off on the sex until she was comfortable and told her so. But she's been avoiding my phone calls lately. So looks like I've been friend-zoned. At the end of the day, you want to go for normal girls who don't have issues and not spend too much time on a messed up chick. It's OK to talk to them on the side, maybe something will come of it. But don't pin a lot of your emotions on it like I did.