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View Full Version : Small day game question: She's sitting alone, do you sit with her?



.Cadmus.
09-05-2006, 11:18 AM
I got it glued in my head, that sitting with a girl or her set shows that you're not only comfortable and not the working structure in the stimulation around her. I think I may have sent a girl bad vibes by miscalibrating and doing this when the girl is sitting by herself..like on a bench at the park or on campus.
Im wondering, when you do an opener isnt it only natural and smart to approach with a question, standing first...and THEN after a few IOIs you sit down with her?
A small question that's been buggin me. Which is your method?

Sy
09-05-2006, 11:24 AM
I kinda do it in a fluid motion, I've seen guys stand there run an opener and then sit down 5 mins later, it looks forced. I kinda start opening and sit next to her as I go. Its much easier to kino on her level, and it works because you can mirror her bodylanguage much easier, rather than standing in front of her which is semi confrontational.

Vapor
09-05-2006, 11:28 AM
Open first, then sit while she replies. Sitting first is going to alarm some women, or come across as weird.

Sy
09-05-2006, 11:29 AM
Also, be smiling when you approach, its very disarming.

Elwing
09-05-2006, 11:35 AM
Make sure you FTC (which is easy in day game, since you're always on your way somewhere, aren't you?) and don't sit until it looks like the set will hook.

Mayhem
09-05-2006, 11:39 AM
Here is how I do it. Run my opener. midway through, look away (heres your nonverbal time constraint), turn back, start your verbal FTC. As you are SAYING it, sit down. Then continue with your opener.
Consider direct also. "Hey I just saw you sitting here and I had to come meet you" and sit your ass down. Then it's just get to know each other time. No worries about FTC, and when to sit etc etc.

Xtreeme
09-05-2006, 11:50 AM
I haven't thought of the vibe im sending when sitting down. I just sit down, cause standing with them sitting makes me nervous. I don't sit right away though. What I do is, I open, and while saying my False time Constraint I sit down. (I don't know if im right, but logically that sounds like the best time to do it) and I've never felt or seen any weird looks.
The math is pretty simple, u put in a time constraint, so she won't be thinking about what other benches she could go to, cause you're leaving in a minute and hey! A public bench is a public bench, unless you're living in the 40s Missisippi and are black there shouldn't be a problem. Now she can relax and listen to your question and soon realise that sitting on that bench that day was the best thing she could ever do :D
Try that one out!
peace!

.Cadmus.
09-05-2006, 12:20 PM
See there's some simple advice in this thread that personally helped. Logically I'll know how a good run should go, how and why everything works, but I forget to ACT on some things.
v v v
Waiting til you KNOW they'll be receptive towards you, is a good idea.
^ ^ ^
I've got a more personal question: How do you approach when they are on a bench or just standing and talking on the cell phone? Also how difficult do you gauge this to be? Harder than a moving set?
However, any topic I put here, is usually for the benefit of guys in my situation (this situation is VERY GENERAL)
What about he body rocking method of approaching, it can only help. But when sitting it looks odd if you say "thisll just take a second" or body rock and then you decide to sit with her.

Sy
09-05-2006, 12:25 PM
On the phone I tend to smile and see if they give me an approach invitation, if not I respect their privacy. On a bench I'd naturally just roll up and say hi. The best is girls on public transport with earphones, they're a lot more open about throwing IOI's at you with the "saftey net" of headphones. Just tap them and then say hi :)

.Cadmus.
09-05-2006, 12:34 PM
On the phone I tend to smile and see if they give me an approach invitation, if not I respect their privacy. On a bench I'd naturally just roll up and say hi. The best is girls on public transport with earphones, they're a lot more open about throwing IOI's at you with the "saftey net" of headphones. Just tap them and then say hi :)
Got a sentence for each of your points.
Hmm, no offense, but you seem like a more direct gamer. We dont use MM just bc is technically one of the best methods, but bc for msot of us thats what works and its flexible. Im not one to be able to direct game smoothly, unless its with girls that arent that pretty (my looks altogether are slightly above avg.) Still I dont like to think that you have to wait to get her attention when shes on the phone (you dont know how long itll take.) TD said to act like you're a retarded person on the phone, as if to imitate her. Seems ballsy, to me I guess, bc it feels like its missing something, for some reason I cnat make myself believe it would work. Anyone try it?
Benchin it, I cant just say hi. I dont have your man candy looks man lol.
As for public transport, like the bus or subway...HOLY CRAP its liek an IOI breed ground over there. It feels like when you're at a wedding and women are in the mood for meeting some sweet guy (ala Wedding Crashers) there's this fate / destiny feeling going through a girl when on those public transports. (Like "I may never see his guy again.") All that romantic-comedy bull. Anyway I thought up a really cool routine that builds off of that fate feeling she gets, its built especially for the public transport. It helps if you have head phones on to. Haha I wanna try it out and then post it on the boards.

Sy
09-05-2006, 01:11 PM
I feel no need to act a fool just to get a girls attention, if she's on the phone and more involved with that than the amazing guy who was about to say hi, her loss.
True, my looks help me, and saying hi I can assume value, but believe me I've been me for 22 years and it didn't always work. I've had "what the hell do you want? go away" a number of times in the past. Often after the hi I will run an opinion opener if there is nothing situational around.

.Cadmus.
09-05-2006, 02:42 PM
yup not trying to offend you on any level. just saying personally for me i cant do that. and as a pua to another, friend to a friend, id say you should try other methods besides MM if you're not already. MM was meant for the lowest of the low to game the classiest girls if enuff work were put in. haha u dont need that

Mayhem
09-05-2006, 02:52 PM
See there's some simple advice in this thread that personally helped. Logically I'll know how a good run should go, how and why everything works, but I forget to ACT on some things.
v v v
Waiting til you KNOW they'll be receptive towards you, is a good idea.
^ ^ ^
I've got a more personal question: How do you approach when they are on a bench or just standing and talking on the cell phone? Also how difficult do you gauge this to be? Harder than a moving set?
However, any topic I put here, is usually for the benefit of guys in my situation (this situation is VERY GENERAL)
What about he body rocking method of approaching, it can only help. But when sitting it looks odd if you say "thisll just take a second" or body rock and then you decide to sit with her.
You don't have to be good looking to do direct. That is just speculation though ;).
Here is how you get girls with Ipods / Cell phones to open. You walk up, say Hey (doesn't matter if she cant hear), then do this hang up / pull plugs out of her ears gesture with your hand. And direct open.
It's about being congruent guys. If you are going to open her powerfully with something like getting her to remove her ipod or cell phone, fucking be congruent with it. Don't stack into Who Lies More, have the balls to say, "Hey, I just thought you were really cute, and I knew I would kick myself if I didn't come meet you". To be honest, I'm not going to open like that unless the girl is worth it. That's why I did indirect to start so I could figure out what the fuck I'm supposed to do afterwards, and how girls respond to things etc. If I really want a girl, she can be surrounded by 10 guys, and 10 girls, I'll open her just like that.

Sy
09-05-2006, 03:24 PM
Edit: crap I wrote the same reply twice without realising!