PDA

View Full Version : One-itis. STOP WRITING THEESE POSTS!



Xtreeme
07-31-2006, 07:12 PM
OMFG, I read the Malibus thread on how to get rid of One-itis (i didn't have one, i just read through the "best of forum") And i completely agree with someone who wrote that newbies should be introduced with reading that thread before they post their first thread on this forum.
Anyway, While im still at it and discovering I was close on falling for it, Guys (or people) under 21 tend to be stuck with one-itis thanks to all the teenage movies. Im pretty sure that older guys have the same problem, but im not that age so im in no place to tell.
Anyway, I think people tend to believe that one-itis is somehow connected to love. It's not.
Love is when respect and infatuation and connection is created on a mutual level between two individuals. One-itis is someone who sees another person with the eyes and don't go with the facts or feelings. She's treating you like shit, she doesn't want you (anymore at least) and there is no mutual attraction. Now, the whole love thing may have existed, but it doesn't anymore. Get over it. But what i'd like to really speak about is the kind of One-itis that is created directly. A guy gets LJBFd but cant think of anything else then woman.
Now, most of the time when i say to AFCs that you need to disqualify a woman, and dhv yourself to create attraction, they often say: That's crazy! If your into her, then be into her. let her know.
NO NO NO NO NO. NOO.
The reason why u in A2 higher your value and lower hers is so that attraction can be created on a mutual level. The reason why u qualify her on A3 is so that she dont feel like your full of shit when u ask for her number or isolate (whatever) because even though you seemed different from most guys, she'll think that your still as everyone else just want to get some booty.
Now can't Pua's fall in love?
Yes we can, but again, it must be on a mutual level.
I'm posting this because one hour ago i read a blog of an hb9 that i k.closed at a party one week ago. We've been talking some over the internet and stuff and it seems like a good wibe between us. She's beatiful, she's smart and her blogs are AMAZING. I read it and i sucked it all up. She's a great writer, you know. she's one of those who can get anyone to feel connected to what she's feeling just because she writes good.
When i read it, I was thinking like OMG she's so perfect. I LOVE THIS CHICK! (I don't but you get the point) and I started to plan on how perfectly I'd get her when i arrive back home (Im in Spain now on vacation). Then i read a little more and somewhere in the text she wrote how miserable she felt the other night about a guy she's been in love with in a while. (seems as she's having a one-itis) By that, I got sad. I started to think like DAMN i k-closed her one week ago and she never even mentioned it once in her blog like: "oh, i met this amazing guy the other night". I REALLY Started to feel needy about her. I got so far that I almost posted on the forum about help.
AND there's where i stopped. I know the answers, I know the "magic" stuff. I know everything. Why do i want to post this? So i started to work on my inner game to get rid of those feelings I had. I simply took a pause for 15 minutes and started to think of stuff like:
"Okay,am I reading her blog and dreaming away on a sailing boat with her, while she's thinking about a guy that she loves? Stop this!" And then I'd think of everything about her that annoys me "she has terrible friends, (an LJBFd AMOG who really hates me for k-closing her) she's smart but she's boring, she's a terrible kisser and i've only met her once. SHE MAD ME TOUCH HER EYES, she's stupid! (i did the "you have beautiful eyes, can i touch them" routine on A3). Now i feel releaved. I still want her, but we are on a mutual level, now i can keep my game on her on a smooth level. I started to think of every other girls I've sarged and have in line to F-close and i decided that when i come to sweden, She's going to be the last one i try to f-close out of those im counting in head. She's one of a hundred to me now, if i loose her, i still have 99 (well 9 in my case, but u get the big picture)
now, can there ever be love between me and HB9? Well, If it can, it will. It will happen, can't force myself to it, otherwise I'll get obsessed on the feeling of being in love and love that particular feeling, not the girl. That is what I truly think a One-itis is.
Thank you for reading this post.

Accent
07-31-2006, 07:15 PM
ok thanks for posting something thats been posted thousand times, and trust me, it doesnt make you any smarter by posting this.
Have a good day
ps i didnt read any of it

Iceman
07-31-2006, 07:26 PM
I did read it...but yes, it has been posted a hundred times.
Congratulations on overcoming your one-itis though. it isn't easy.

Lazy
07-31-2006, 07:33 PM
It's easy to say "Yeah, get over someone you have loved and have been in a LTR with" but saying it is much easier than doing it.
Instead of everyone getting angry at every one-itis post, why not create a one-itis forum and let people talk about it there? Then atleast you don't have to check that part if you're not interested.
One-itis is a real bitch, it really is, I'm still trying to get over my ex and it's not easy and I honestly feel sad for other people in similar situations as me.

IceNow
07-31-2006, 07:38 PM
Its true that there are thousand of post about one-itis, but Xtreeme show another point of view in this one, its useful because he posted about what he specifically did for overcoming a minor one-itis, and that could give other people ideas for solving their problem too, including myself if Im starting to have one-itis again in my life.
So Accent, you dont have the need to attack something that you didnt even read, because you dont know if this could be useful for someone.
ICE:cool:

that_asian_guy
07-31-2006, 07:57 PM
I think we have to understand that most of these one-itis posts come from teenagers. Their one-itis is what drove them to the community to begin with.
I know that's why I found the community.

JohnnyOs
07-31-2006, 08:07 PM
Instead of everyone getting angry at every one-itis post, why not create a one-itis forum and let people talk about it there? Then atleast you don't have to check that part if you're not interested.
Because from a PUA standpoint, one- itis is a bad thing. Being in pickup is about improving your game by meeting thousands of different women and trying thousands of different things in thousands of different situations. You cannot improve your game if you let "this one girl" be your sticking point. I'm kinda sick of all the kiddies who come through here without much or any knowledge of MM or the "game" in general, looking for a magical way to get "this one girl." Mystery is not Hitch, and this forum is not fucking Cosmo; so people should just stop with the one- itis posts.

Accent
07-31-2006, 08:27 PM
Yeh its great to bash one-itis until you get one

JohnnyOs
07-31-2006, 09:09 PM
Yeh its great to bash one-itis until you get one
It doesn't matter how hard it is to get over a one-itis. If anybody has one, they better fucking get over it or their game will not improve, period.

Accent
07-31-2006, 09:13 PM
It wont improve, but it WILL drag them down, no matter how many times you will say get over it, its hard.
Everybody knows they need to get over it, but if there was only this magic pill for everything

antman
07-31-2006, 09:21 PM
Hey accent i dont think ive ever read a useful post from you on this entire forum, so next time you go to put somone down who just made a huge breakthrough in his life, shove a yellow taxi up your ass instead.
xtreeme- good post man, your 16 and now way ahead of the game. I can relate to you somewhat in your little story, way to become positive. Game on man. :cool:

Accent
07-31-2006, 09:26 PM
you know, its ok, besides that i cant see a great post fromy uo either besides bashing something, but its ok man. i dont try to be like PUA or anything like that, i just read forums and try to get best if it.
dont take my advice seriously in no way, iam just another afc you know ;)

Hawt
07-31-2006, 09:26 PM
ok thanks for posting something thats been posted thousand times, and trust me, it doesnt make you any smarter by posting this.
Have a good day
ps i didnt read any of it
Wow and this is coming from the guy who told me...

hawt no offense but thats like second thread (just I see) you reaply with Worst Of. Come on dude, you can do better than that, at least suggest something, I am pretty sure you wouldnt want your topic going to worst of
Yet I don't see you suggesting anything, just dragging this guy down. Hypocrisy anyone? I mean come on dude, you can do better than that...
Edit: As for the guy who suggested a oneitis forum, it sounds like a good idea, but then again most of these guys won't admit they have oneitis. Either they don't read anything before posting or they say "this isn't oneitis but...." We would have to conceal the forum name with something like "Is there one special girl? Post here to get help"

fatjoe
07-31-2006, 10:38 PM
to be honest most of ya'll are lame. I've posted a few threads regarding specific girls I've been workin on & how they've gone & requestin tips. Everytime someones gotta reply with somethin like yeah u sound like u got one-itis.

antman
07-31-2006, 11:01 PM
Lets see one of these threads, from what you just posted though it sounds like you keep going in and out of oneitis if that even makes sense lol.
I dont mean to mock you, but wokring on girls may be your problem. The mystery method goes from point a to point b (or point s :D ). Open a girl, display value, let her display value, confirm mutual attraction, build comfort, seduce. There is no "working on it" for any amount of time....just do it. If your not closing figure out where your problem is and work on it, post about it, not about girls your "working on" over the internet, or your latest incongruent scheme you cooked up over the course of a week to use on that one girl and ask for an opinion on it...

Lazy
08-01-2006, 02:56 AM
Because from a PUA standpoint, one- itis is a bad thing. Being in pickup is about improving your game by meeting thousands of different women and trying thousands of different things in thousands of different situations. You cannot improve your game if you let "this one girl" be your sticking point. I'm kinda sick of all the kiddies who come through here without much or any knowledge of MM or the "game" in general, looking for a magical way to get "this one girl." Mystery is not Hitch, and this forum is not fucking Cosmo; so people should just stop with the one- itis posts.
Oh I'm aware of that, I merely meant it's a common problem.
When I mentioned a sub-forum that people can talk about it, I don't mean so they can dwell on it forever, I mean it should be there so they can talk about it (talking about problems and reading about other peoples similar problems can help) and get over it.
My idea was more for people that have had an LTR and just come out of it type of 1-itis rather than the people that sit and fret over someone they haven't even been that close to.
I hope that cleared that up a little for you. :D

Pseudo
08-01-2006, 03:11 AM
Just get over it. I don't say this becuase I hate hearing you talk about it and its not because you aren't justified in having your feelings or because MM is all about sex, because its not. The reason you should get over it is because it sucks to obsees over someone you're never going to get, in fact its the obsessing that will keep you from ever getting her. The constant rejection and feeling of inferiority that one-itis subjects you to can put your self-esteem in the gutter for years. So, you can sit alone in the dark and listen to love songs while you cry softly to yourself, and if thats what you want to do leave and then never log back on again. If you don't want to help yourself and you just want to play out some little romantic cliche of the tourtered soul hoping for the love of his life to notice him then you can, but I suggest you get over yourself and find a girl who will feel the same way about you. You'll be a lot happier, I know because one-itis brought me here too and I'm a lot happier with girls that like me back than being by myself feeling like no one could ever want me.
Great post to start this thread, I've done the exact same thing except with myspace, just going to her profile again and again figuring out where it had all gone wrong, until I looked at what I was doing, then laughed, then stopped doing it. When I get over it I try and look at unatractive body parts on them, feet if they have sandals and have been walking in dirty/dusty places, armpits, hair anywhere but their head, most people don't like these (no judgement if you do) and they've been a lot of help for me especially when you need to get over someone that sits near you in a class or in some other situation that forces you near her.
cool to see another 16-year-old here, keep sarging.

Xtreeme
08-01-2006, 08:13 AM
Wow, the reaction of my thread sure was big. Now obviusly it started a debate and some people were arguing. Don't really know how to comment that so i'll leave it empty.
Anyway, the reactions were both good and bad, thank you all. First of all, thanx for the good reactions, but also those who wrote the bad ones. It made me re-read the thread and clearify some stuff that i noticed i may have come wrong on.
I wrote this, NOT because I don't like the newbies or the guys that posts about one-itis. BUT for the only reason that pretty much 80% of everyone KNOWS how to deal with it. I want to remind people that the only way to get rid of a one-itis is to get rid of her. We aren't doing "The Hitch" thing over here and saving relationships, we are doing social dynamics so that u'll have relationship with the KIND of womanS you REALLY want. But still, a one-itis is really hard to drop. But what i really meant about writing is before you get the one-itis, before u get LJBFd or whatever. The time when u ACTUALLY CAN save yourself. Like with what i wrote, i gave the girl so much value and we've only kissed, she's still intrested of me (I think, at least, since we're still talking) but i was getting WAY much interest. It's at this point when u can choose. Choose to either obsesse over her, write in the forum about her and in your subconcius mind claim her as a oneitis (or at least claim that u just CANT afford to screw up) OR choose to lower her value, consider your other options, that way you'll higher you chanses on getting her, though u still may fail, you wont be obsessed since you know you got options and u never claimed to urself that u CANT afford to screw up. U don't need her.
I'm sure that people tend to get obsessed by admitting it somehow before they are.
Hope everyone got the picture and my point.
Keep it coming guys, this is indeed a debate-able topic, but PLS keep it friendly haha :)
Peace

Xtreeme
08-01-2006, 08:15 AM
Wow, the reaction of my thread sure was big. Now obviusly it started a debate and some people were arguing. Don't really know how to comment that so i'll leave it empty.
Anyway, the reactions were both good and bad, thank you all. First of all, thanx for the good reactions, but also those who wrote the bad ones. It made me re-read the thread and clearify some stuff that i noticed i may have come wrong on.
I wrote this, NOT because I don't like the newbies or the guys that posts about one-itis. BUT for the only reason that pretty much 80% of everyone KNOWS how to deal with it. I want to remind people that the only way to get rid of a one-itis is to get rid of her. We aren't doing "The Hitch" thing over here and saving relationships, we are doing social dynamics so that u'll have relationship with the KIND of womanS you REALLY want. But still, a one-itis is really hard to drop. But what i really meant about writing is before you get the one-itis, before u get LJBFd or whatever. The time when u ACTUALLY CAN save yourself. Like with what i wrote, i gave the girl so much value and we've only kissed, she's still intrested of me (I think, at least, since we're still talking) but i was getting WAY much interest. It's at this point when u can choose. Choose to either obsesse over her, write in the forum about her and in your subconcius mind claim her as a oneitis (or at least claim that u just CANT afford to screw up) OR choose to lower her value, consider your other options, that way you'll higher you chanses on getting her. Though u still may fail, you wont be obsessed since you know you got options and u never claimed to urself that u CANT afford to screw up. U don't need her.
I'm sure that people tend to get obsessed by admitting it somehow before they are.
Hope everyone got the picture and my point.
Keep it coming guys, this is indeed a debate-able topic, but PLS keep it friendly haha :)
Peace

that_asian_guy
08-01-2006, 08:30 AM
I gotta be honest I have one-itis, i just know better then to ask for help on it.
I don't want to have it anymore. I want to use MM to get any girl i want, not waste time on one girl...

RockHouse
08-01-2006, 08:32 AM
Being in pickup is about improving your game by meeting thousands of different women...
I have to disagree with that. I haven't read through the rest of the posts to see if someone commented on this, but my main reason for looking for the community was so I could help myself improve myself. Not to necessarily seduce a million women. I've already found myself doing things I prolly wouldn't have before.
I look at my situation like Sweater, from The Game. He was looking for the skills to marry an extremely beautiful woman. I'm 24, divorced, and I'm tired of the whole dating game. I'm not to the point where I'm gonna save up thousands of dollars and get a mail-order bride. That'll never happen.
But pickup, to me and quite possibly many others, is more about self-improvement and not just sleeping with as many women as you can, or holding four or five girls at once. Two sides to every coin, bro. That's one side of it.

antman
08-01-2006, 08:51 AM
I belive by meeting thousands of women he meant improving your social skills, not laying 600+ women...
This community is about self improvement but how are you tired of the dating game at 24?
Hm lets see, if you dated her for a year and a half and you were married for say a year, got divorced, its been a few months, your looking at like 3 years.
So your telling me that by 21, before you found this community, you had seduced and been in more fufilling ltrs than you could ever want?
I forget where this quote came from but it goes something like, "the chances of her being the one are almost zero, you have a 3 times better chance of getting struck by lightning than finding the one that soon"-Thats the basis of the quote anyways. Basically its saying that dating 10 women and then getting married to the girl you were meant to find is an illusion and extremely unlikely. Now going and dating 100+ women increases your chance of finding the one 10 fold if you look at it from a mathematical viewpoint.
The game is a novel based on a true story, dont take everything from it so literally. Not to mention i belive sweater ended up in quite a shitty situation after all was said and done.

Xtreeme
08-01-2006, 09:55 AM
"the chances of her being the one are almost zero, you have a 3 times better chance of getting struck by lightning than finding the one that soon"
Malibu said it in the One-Itis faq on the "best of forum"
Peace

JohnnyOs
08-01-2006, 10:29 AM
I belive by meeting thousands of women he meant improving your social skills, not laying 600+ women...
That.

RockHouse
08-01-2006, 11:16 AM
I realize that it was a novel and I'm not taking everything in it literally.
While I think it was a good book of literary art, I know that there's a good deal in there that's fiction.
I'm just trying to draw a comparison about myself and a character in the book, but not saying we're one in the same. And, yes, Sweater got himself fucked because he couldn't handle it. I can. This I know beyond a shadow of a doubt.
And you hit it right on the head. Married at 20. Divorced at 21.
Not saying I've lived a life harder than anyone else on here, but through everything that I had to go through when I was younger, I feel as though I've lived as long as my 50 y/o father. Part of me does feel like I'm so much older than I really am. That's why my friend's come to me for relationship advice is because I've been there, done that, got the certificate.
I'm just beyond my years and feel old. Do I still go out to the bars and drink, get buck wild and swangin'? Hell yeah.
Now, I wasn't tryin' to attack anybody here with this post or my previous one. Just putting out another point of view. To each his own. Right?

Mayhem
08-01-2006, 11:32 AM
I didn't read all of this, but what does it matter if people post threads about one-itis?

Accent
08-01-2006, 12:53 PM
I didn't read all of this, but what does it matter if people post threads about one-itis?
Thank you

antman
08-01-2006, 01:01 PM
1/10 oneitis threads isnt bad but when the majority of the threads in a section are about the same loser topic it becomes a hassle to sort through them and find a decent thread to help someone with a real problem.
so conveince at best

Hawt
08-01-2006, 01:33 PM
Like Antman said, it's a pain in the ass. Every week there are like 4-5 new threads about something oneitis related and if these people would just read the faq it would cut down on them. I come to this forum wanting to help out new guys, and I don't mind a few repetitive posts, but oneitis ones are all the same, "I'm in love with this girl" "this isn't oneitis but" or "i just read the game how can i pick up this girl in my class? i used to follow her around and sit outside her window at night but i think i have a chance now that i know about game"
Some sort of solution where they have to read the faq and a take a quiz, or making a sticky that says "Is there one special girl? Find out how to game her here!" that will trick guys with oneitis into reading it and then learning about oneitis. Even a oneitis forum was suggested by none of these ideas seem to be acknowledged by the mods. I guess because these retards make the company the most money by signing up for bootcamps.
Also please note that I am not calling these people stupid for having oneitis, which seems to be what a lot of you guys think. I have had oneitis, you have had oneitis, pretty much everyone has had oneitis, that's why we got into the community. I am calling them stupid because they don't read the faq or even the stickies related to oneitis, and then come and post about this one special girl, and then argue in denial about it by claiming they are in love/what the fuck ever. They aren't willing to accept the truth and learn, and thus in turn waste everyones time.

Accent
08-01-2006, 05:05 PM
Just by saying this it wont stop guys, there will be always people in this world who little behind and those who are ahead. It might not be a big deal for you or anyone in here about one-itis, but it is for those guys who come in here totaly lost (yes they should read faq) but we alway will have at least one person who will post that, so we gotta deal with it or make new sub forum :D

Xtreeme
08-02-2006, 06:22 AM
Kinetic and Accent. Please just read what i've wrote. at least the second post on this thread.
It's not about DONT WRITE IT, WE HATE IT. It's about less talking more action. And MOST of all, its about from the start of having a one-itis, DONT give up admitting, she's my one-itis, i can't forget about her. Let me quote myself: " I'm sure that people tend to get obsessed by admitting it somehow before they are. " And this applies to a lot of persons. My thread isn't about cleaning up the forum, but to help guys realise that posting on the forum wont help, this is something that REALLY needs action, and not repairing through a guide u got from a couple of PUAs that never even met a girl.
Got the picture? Please just say yes or no so this boring debate can stop.
Peace!

Accent
08-02-2006, 12:33 PM
I wasnt debating, we cool man, its all good :D

Xtreeme
10-05-2006, 12:15 PM
I didn't read all of this, but what does it matter if people post threads about one-itis?
It matters because when they do it, they are actually subcounciously giving up in their mind.
Especially the early one itis, you just met a girl and you feel like "man I CANT afford to mess this up, I need to post this on the forum"
That is a slippery slope. You are subcounciously admitting that this girl has specific VALUE to you and ever MORE value then you have for her.
Of course we all are going to get married, but when we do, we want the value to grow mutually. (this apply to LTRs too)
So what this post is about is simply:
If you ever feel like you need to post about a single girl cause you can't afford to loose her. then it's over, it's game over!
But try instead to fight it, to forget about it and be READY to move on!!!
That's going to save you from what Accent witness as something that's a REALLY PAIN IN THE ASS!!!
Peace!

Sheek
10-08-2006, 12:18 PM
"i just read the game how can i pick up this girl in my class? i used to follow her around and sit outside her window at night but i think i have a chance now that i know about game"
Hawt, you're my hero.
:cool:

Tyler Junior
10-08-2006, 12:41 PM
EXtreeme. This was an great post. ONE-itis is like a fuckin disease.
I hope we all can get over our one-itis. It sucks man.
TJ.

Xtreeme
10-08-2006, 02:01 PM
Hey man!
How did it go with that model?
PM me.
Peace!