Discuss Building up confidence to take on a college campus at the The 18-21 Forum within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; Building up confidence to take on a college campus
I just joined this ...
Building up confidence to take on a college campus
I just joined this forum after being recommended to the site by a friend who also lent me The Game which completely convinced me to take the steps towards being a PUA. I've had some past successes with girls with two serious g/f's and some hook-ups at campus parties. However, I still lack the confidence to approach girls without anxiety. I'm a fairly confident guy normally, I find myself tall, good-looking, and I'm usually the center of attention in social situations. To a lot of my friends I come off as an alpha because I really don't care what people think about me, but I naturally get nervous around the female persuasion and act out in response, usually getting laughs and friendship, but no attraction.
Recently I've begun to try to turn this all around through some simple confidence builders such as saying hello or making eye contact with girls as I pass and have tried the group theory on the bus once to decent success. I was just wondering if anyone on here knew of ways to build up my confidence around women so I can better approach. I really want to get out there and seriously get to know more girls and show my personality to the world. Any help would be greatly appreciated.
Take everything I say below as grain of salt.
Originally Posted by BigWayne
Well, seems like your doing the right things...keep doing the things your doing. After saying hello, just see how long you can stay in before leaving even if the vibe is weird. Another would just wear something goofy for the fun of it while talking to people, to get that "I look dumb" idea out of your head. (I actually should just get that pirate hat out for fun again ). I'd go with also checking out campus/collegue your going and chatting up some people, girls and guys, so you get a better feel for it when you actually do go there.
With that I think your pretty good already, I'll add more if needed later. As of learning routines and such...I mean you can but from my impression of you from this post I don't think you need them AT ALL.
PS: As of being a PUA, my view of it is your just cutting yourself at the knees. Its a very ego based idea to say I want to be a PUA, instead of improving yourself and getting that "reasoned confidence", just knowing you improve a women's day or everyone's in general.
Last edited by Dragon; 04-09-2007 at 01:04 PM.
Fear of what you can do is an illusion, what you can do is a illusion of fear.
Be cafeful of closed cases senarios, aka school, work, or any situation that you will be seeing the same people because as everybody knows, people talk.
People will begin to notice you if you come out and try to start gameing all the HBs. HBs know other HBs and they do talk, ABOUT EVERYTHING
Unfortunatly it might not be good talk. If i were in your shoes (college campus) i would keep it at A1 or A2 but not too much further, and remember, do it fot he love of the game.
Best of luck and welcome to the game
Embrace failure. AA is your body's way of protecting itself from potentially dangerous things. Go start a conversation with a dozen groups of people in a row. Off campus. Don't build your skillset around people you see everyday. You're conditioning yourself to the sensation of talking to strangers. The more you do it, the less anxiety is an issue.
Originally Posted by BigWayne
BTW, this is the only thing that works. Trust me.
Assuming you're not a kidney harvester, we can chat in the car. - Cedar
Thanks a lot for the responses guys, I've been having a great time just making eye contact with attractive girls when I walk by and illiciting reactions. Luckily, I go to a big public university so 99% of the people I pass I either have never seen or don't remember. I actually approached a group of girls on a bus today and used the jealous g/f opener and started a good convo so I was pretty proud of myself just for that.
I've got a good friend on campus who introduced me to this stuff so hopefully we'll be going out to some parties soon so I can put the confidence I'm building to the test.
P.S.~ I work in a hardware store and actually realized that I practice on most of the people who come in there, just starting conversations and trying to use the right body language to increase my image. So basically senior citizens are helping me build my game.