Like Tree1Likes

Dont know what to do with this girl??

Discuss Dont know what to do with this girl?? at the The 18-21 Forum within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; Dont know what to do with this girl?? Hey! So me and this girl have ...

12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 14
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Gender:
    Age
    20
    Posts
    24
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Dont know what to do with this girl??

    Hey!

    So me and this girl have been spoken to each other for about 1Ĺ month. Since we both do sports at the same gym, we have been seeing each other at the gym almost every day the last month. Things went great, and i asked her to hang out, cause i thought that it would be perfect time to kiss. But now it seems that this girl doesn't have time for me. Even though she said that she wants to hang out with me so much .That means that we cant hang out for about 6 weeks, which means that i dont have the chance of kissing her.. But the story continues... Now it seems that we wont even see each other in 4 weeks because of different vacations. And she texted me that she thought that things might change without seeing eachother, and if we just could be good friends until vacations ends. I told her the way i felt, and told her that i did not want to spend time on her, if she doesnt have any time for me.. But now she keeps texting me, and i might still want to date her again, but i already know that she doesnt have time for me.
    What should i do in this case? Be patient and wait for her to have time? Just let her go? Or something different?
    Sorry for long post, and bad english! Hope you can help!



  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Gender:
    Age
    22
    Posts
    57
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    The best thing to do right now is to slowly let her go while she is on vacation. Go out, have fun, and make sure she knows that you can have fun without her and that you're a fun guy. Check in on her every now and then by texting her. Also, make sure that when you are texting her that you leave her with the last word / text. that way when you want to re-initiate contact it looks a lot better because she was the last one that texted you. When she is back from vacation and you have time for her you can then you can start it back up again.

    Oh and by the way, stay away from talking about the whole "I dont want to waste time on you if you don't have time for me". If you feel that way, SHOW it, rather than telling her. It just creates a bad mood right away and can even ruin your chances all together.

    Couple of ways of showing it can be
    Not contacting her, going out having fun. She will then contact first and want to create time for you.
    You also have to make sure that she can see that you're going out and having fun. (facebook pictures, running into her out, running into one of her friends, ect.)

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Gender:
    Age
    20
    Posts
    24
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Thank you for the answer.
    I can really use this!

    How often should i text her? And should i text her while she's on vacation?

    And theres one more thing im not sure about. Will it be a good idea, to let her know im still interested? (i kind of fucked it up, by texting her that maybe it will not work with the two of us.. She still keep texting me though) And if i should let her know im interested in what way should i do it? I guess it would not be smart to just tell her directly?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Gender:
    Age
    27
    Posts
    16
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Just slowly moved her and enjoy yourself, feel hr that you are enjoying without her.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Gender:
    Age
    20
    Posts
    24
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Thanks to you as well hira.

    But im still not sure about the thing that if i should let her know im still interested in her? And how i should tell it, withouth saying it directly.

    Hope you can help again!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Gender:
    Age
    22
    Posts
    57
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    yeah you kind of did mess it up...and you can brush it under the rug (so to speak) and hope that she forgets about it, but girls are weird man...they tend to remember A LOT of stuff. You could say something along the lines of "Hey, I know I said that things probably wouldn't work out between us earlier, but let's just forget that ever happened lol I just wanna have fun and see where it goes! And your fun starts with a bomb ass (amazing) vacation so hope you have a good one, I know I'm gonna make the most of mine! lol" something like that. really fun and playful...not pressuring her into anything.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Gender:
    Age
    25
    Posts
    933
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 27 Times in 24 Posts
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by arcsaber View Post
    Thanks to you as well hira.

    But im still not sure about the thing that if i should let her know im still interested in her? And how i should tell it, withouth saying it directly.

    Hope you can help again!
    She knows you are interested... You are messaging her. Why would you be talking to her if you werenít interested? She isnít stupid. (She may not know how into you, or initiate anything because of it, but she will definitely suspect this is the case).

    Also the above about you maybe it will not work with the two of us.. How did you say this? This can either be a good thing for a bad thing.
    If said in the right way as a false disqualifier, it can be a very powerful tool to use.

    If you said, 'You donít talk to me enough, and I miss you, this wonít work out bla bla bla' then you have acted very AFC and that will not play in your favour.

    If you said 'haha, we would never work out, you are too much of a dork', then that is more than likely going to build attraction, as you become a challenge for her by using the false disqualifier.

    AS for messaging her when she is away, I would leave her alone. She is going to be busy, having fun with her friends, probably out partying and picking up dudes. You do not want to be the annoying little shit on the side who keeps messaging and wanting her attention. Even if she writes back, you are probably not going to get the greatest responses, and you will end up sitting by your phone for hours wondering why she doesnít care enough about you to write back.

    On the other hand, if she is busy and having fun with her friends, and still finds the time it initiate a text conversation with you, or better yet a PHONE CALL (Yes, mobile phones CAN be used for calling each other as well) then I would be taking that as an IOI.


    When you are on holiday, limit your text (unless she is initiating). Try to not have long conversations via text.... But more importantly try to limit the texting period. Try to get her on the phone. You canít really do anything except build limited levels of comfort with text. Via a phone call you can DHV a lot easier and build attraction, comfort and even qualification.

    Stop being needy as well. You havenít really done anything with this girl except get her phone number. I donít understand why you are telling someone who havenít kissed or anything how you feel about her? How do you know how you feel? You donít really know her that well, and you donít really know her intimately either. Plus, you havenít slept with her... How can you have strong feelings for someone who you havenít slept with, or spent a significant amount of time with?


    Patients is good - But you also have to know when to act. If you just sit around and wait for her to initiate everything, and ask you out, and grab your cock and put it inside of her, I think you will be waiting for a very long time. Give her positive reinforcement when she does things you like. If she asks you what you are up to bla bla bla and wants to have a chat, say, 'Hey, Iím busy right now, I will give you a call when I get a bit of spare time'.

    Once you have her on the phone you will find it significantly easier to get her out. Girls are so much less likely to flake via phone call, than via text.

    Sorry for long post, but the above vague and ambiguous advice was annoying me, so I thought I would spell it out for you.
    I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds, and fast cars. The rest I just squandered.
    ~ George Best
    The war between the sexes is over. Men won the second women started doing pole dancing for exercise.
    ~ Jacob Palmer

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Gender:
    Age
    27
    Posts
    16
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by arcsaber View Post
    Thanks to you as well hira.

    But im still not sure about the thing that if i should let her know im still interested in her? And how i should tell it, withouth saying it directly.

    Hope you can help again!
    Well not saying directly, hmmm! Write on paper your feeling and post it and leave rest on her what she do.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Gender:
    Age
    20
    Posts
    24
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Thanks again!

    So Portrait:
    Well i kind of said to her that it wouldn't work out, cause i needed a girl which have time for me. She became a bit angry, but i think that she's okay now.
    And yeah i think i will have to be more relaxed about her, since it way to early to say that i do really like her.
    And about this patience, i've already been pushing her very much, to take time for me. Both in a slight serious way, but also in a kind of teasing way. So in my own opinion i think that she also have to initiate a bit now.

    Thanks again for these advices!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Gender:
    Age
    25
    Posts
    933
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 27 Times in 24 Posts
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by hira View Post
    Well not saying directly, hmmm! Write on paper your feeling and post it and leave rest on her what she do.
    Whatever you do - DONT DO THAT.

    Thats is super lame, super AFC and she will think your weird for sending her a 'love letter'.

    Hira, I am not sure if you where joking about this or not?



    As for arcsaber, it doesnt mean you cant ask her out again, but just be a little bit less full on with her. I think you probably just freaked her out a bit. This holiday for both of you is probably coming at a good time, as you have a bit of an excuse not to talk for while, but when you reinitiate there should be heaps to talk about due to your holidays.
    I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds, and fast cars. The rest I just squandered.
    ~ George Best
    The war between the sexes is over. Men won the second women started doing pole dancing for exercise.
    ~ Jacob Palmer

Similar Threads

  1. Met this girl, dont know what to do
    By efisoccer in forum Newbie Discussion Forum
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 05-05-2011, 12:33 PM
  2. *HELP* I dont understand this girl
    By Karlsaysthat in forum The 18-21 Forum
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 03-10-2011, 12:14 AM
  3. What to do when your girl does something you dont like?
    By stricktease in forum Relationships
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 05-27-2010, 07:22 PM
  4. I got a girl to like me, but dont like her. How do i IOD?
    By Bomb1288 in forum The 18-21 Forum
    Replies: 12
    Last Post: 08-22-2006, 05:32 AM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  • Forum Rules

Recommended


Daytime Dating



Magic Bullets



Beyond Words



Love Systems Routines Manual



The Ultimate Guide to Text and Phone Game



Interview Series



Love Systems Relationship Management



Love Systems Program Schedule





Facebook  Twitter