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Discuss Made plans to hang out with girl.. she wants to bring her friends at the The 18-21 Forum within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; Made plans to hang out with girl.. she wants to bring her friends Background in ...
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    Made plans to hang out with girl.. she wants to bring her friends

    Background in cliffs format:

    - Hit it off with an acquaintance at a party
    - Got her number and we agreed to hang out some time soon
    - We text each other every so often; she texts me first usually
    - Show signs of interest, but not blatant interest (both parties)
    - She invites me to hang out with her group of friends one day over text
    - I decline because a)fuck that, and b) I had plans to hang out with my friends that day anyway
    - Hoping she wouldn't pull that shit again, I arrange to meet up again later on in the week
    - She agrees, but drops the bomb that her friends will be joining her (I think 1 or 2 female friends and 1 male friend)
    - I accept at first but she knows I'll be busy that day so I can probably easily bail out at the last minute and ask for a raincheck

    Conclusion:
    a) Friend zoned
    b) Too nervous/uncomfortable 1:1, so she wants to hang out first with her friends and take it from there
    c) Wants her friends to evaluate me first
    d) Friend-zoned and simply wants to hang out

    Thoughts? Advice?



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    if its 2 female friends and 1 male.... she just wants their approval..... its up to u to be the man... make it ur mission to make them LOVE u.... because what they think matters... i used to fuck up situations like that alot....

    even if its 1 girl and one guy..... make them fall in love with u.....

    this ones easy bro... ur overthinkin it.... but u gotta bring ur A game regardless

    work on the dude first... and then her female friend.... but make sure you make your intentions known.... dont put urself in the friend zone.... your gonna see it in her eyes when shes comfortable.... and then its all up to u

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    Shes testing you. Youre cool but are you cool enough for her friends to think so. That, OR shes LJBFing you. Very commonly girls will ask to hang out and last minute add friends if they are not sexually interested. Go out with her friends, then try for 1:1. If it doesnt happen NEXT>

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    If she was interested, she'd come alone in hopes that you'll make some moves on her, not in front of her friends.
    “On the Road of Life, There's Always Another Bus”

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    So it always seems like some people think it's just a test for her approval, whereas others think I'm just being friend-zoned and she's not interested.

    REGARDLESS.. since I didn't make it explicit that it's a "DATE" and we always just said 'we should HANG OUT', I'm just thinking about having fun here with everyone. Probably won't make any blatant moves.

    I'm also planning on bringing my really charming friend so we can just entertain them and then hopefully hang out again later and escalate things.

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    Quote Originally Posted by habanero81 View Post

    I'm also planning on bringing my really charming friend so we can just entertain them and then hopefully hang out again later and escalate things.
    That's a good idea. Perhaps he'll be able to run interference while you try to attract this chick. Just agree with him beforehand that you are the alpha guy. Have him talk you up while you've stepped away to the bathroom.
    “On the Road of Life, There's Always Another Bus”

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    So we ended up hanging out. It was me, my best friend, her, and her good friend (who's also a guy), so it was 3 guys and the 1 girl.

    We were at a hookah bar and there was no booze involved (except for one drink I ordered that tasted like ass) and the conversations were good. It was mainly me talking with my friend backing up my stories and the girl laughing. I'd say my friend and I did like 65% of the talking and she did around 30% talking, with her friend doing 5%. So we pretty much dominated the conversations, which isn't good, I guess. But we made her laugh a lot so I dunno. Her friend was kind of just awkwardly there; he didn't seem to be enjoying himself too much but I tried to talk to him so I didn't ignore him completely. I sorta knew him from before too because I met him at a party once but that's about it.

    I sat next to the girl but I really wasn't paying attention to body language. Aside from our knees brushing against each other every so often, not that much going on. It was literally just a chill sesh with a lot of funny stories and laughing.

    When we parted ways, she gave me a hug and a hug to my friend and then an hour later she sent me a text saying she had fun and that we should def. hang out again.

    Thing is, I can't tell if she's just interested in being friends or if she's interested but being very discreet about it.

    I'm thinking about sending her a text or chatting with her online and basically going 'listen, I'd like to get to know you better 1:1 next time, but if you only see me as a friend, I'm totally cool with that.'

    Basically, I just want ot be direct and find out where I stand before I try to pursue or play stupid games.

    Thoughts?

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    I would simply ask her out again and see if she tries to bring people for a second time... if she does then i would go direct.

    No reason to go direct after 1 date IMO.
    "No matter how hot or how desirable a woman is to you, she is still *just a girl*. If you treat all women equally, you aren't likely to get flustered or nervous around girls you really like, they're just girls" - My number 1 rule.

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    I'm thinking about sending her a text or chatting with her online and basically going 'listen, I'd like to get to know you better 1:1 next time, but if you only see me as a friend, I'm totally cool with that.'

    Basically, I just want ot be direct and find out where I stand before I try to pursue or play stupid games.
    That may work, but I wouldn't take that angle. When a girl invites you out with her friends it gives you a good opportunity to DHV yourself to her social group, which it looks like you did. Sometimes that's as good of a first date as you're going to get and it would cost you to decline the invitation (read what magic bullets says about emotional momentum).

    Keep the text exchanges up. I agree with Kir Diesel.

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    If you tell her to bring her friends to meet you your group, or if she says she is with a friend and wants to see you, or if she'll be hanging out with a friend and can't drop him or her off and wants to see you that fine.

    However there is absolutely no way whatsoever that a girl would bring her friends to meet a guy she liked and had something going with.

    Thinking that she wants her friends to judge you is just paranoid defeatist thinking that gives women way too much credit. While women value the opinion of other women, they're not out to judge you.

    Also it's not a bad thing when you dominate the conversation, not necessarily good either, it's more complex than that, some women just like being quiet. It's if she enjoys herself and likes you or not that's important.

    I would say that there's a 30% chance she doesn't like you, and a 70% chance that she does like you but doesn't know things are supposed to be sexual between you two. You just need to turn things sexual.
    Love

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